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Samuu212

Offline (the 09/17/2014 at 6:55pm) | Search for a member

Samuu212

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Thursday 1 December 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 532
  • Number of comments : 3
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Samuu212 : Hey there :3

Samuu212's page activity

Visits<b>xivoricbutterfly</b> - the 06/24/2014 at 7:30pm<b>DeadshotDaquiri</b> - the 05/31/2014 at 1:37am<b>jelly_rolls</b> - the 05/27/2014 at 2:49am<b>animalover9</b> - the 03/24/2014 at 4:01pm<b>Comet_Candy</b> - the 03/12/2014 at 1:57am<b>billionair11</b> - the 01/28/2014 at 11:31am<b>RinkuTheHero</b> - the 01/21/2014 at 12:56am<b>StiffPvtParts</b> - the 12/29/2013 at 3:15pm<b>fairy1775</b> - the 12/28/2013 at 11:40pm<b>Paulcs</b> - the 12/24/2013 at 7:47am<b>Welshite</b> - the 12/05/2013 at 4:34pm<b>killerky</b> - the 11/18/2013 at 3:47am<b>DeidaraAkatsuki</b> - the 10/20/2013 at 10:00am<b>actuallyahippo</b> - the 10/09/2013 at 2:28pm<b>KatieMajestic</b> - the 10/02/2013 at 11:26pm<b>StarrliteFire</b> - the 09/30/2013 at 1:35am<b>Angel_of_Night</b> - the 09/20/2013 at 1:22pm<b>FMLkoala</b> - the 09/19/2013 at 7:53am

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Samuu212's favorite FMLs

Today, my mum begged me to let her put fake nails on me to practice for her styling exam. I've been sitting on the toilet for the past half an hour trying to figure out how to wipe without damaging something. FML

Today, I downloaded Grindr to my phone. It also downloaded to my mom's phone, my dad's phone, and my brother's phone. FML

#21030290
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37274) - you deserved it (19940)

On 01/16/2014 at 9:51pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, it was raining heavily so I wore my black poncho as I walked to work. On the way there I noticed an old and seemingly homeless man following me. I turned around to confront him. He picked up a stick and screamed "Expecto Patronum!" Apparently I look like a dementor. FML

#20558527
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31314) - you deserved it (5900)

On 03/24/2013 at 8:23pm - misc - by Anna L. - United States (Texas)

Today, my husband thought it would be funny to tell my 10-year-old son that if he wanted to get girls, he had to do the Gangnam Style. My son has now non-stop been doing the Gangnam Style. FML

#20136801
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21304) - you deserved it (4126)

On 10/28/2012 at 10:53am - kids - by friedbutter - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my mom was feeling down, so I decided to buy her a gift. Knowing she likes lighthouses, I bought her a tiny one that plugs in and lights up. I brought it home, plugged it in, and when she saw me with it, she said, "Wipe that smirk off your face and get that junk out of here." FML

Today, I was talking to my boyfriend. He won't go on a cruise with me in the gulf of Mexico, because he thinks we will crash into an iceberg like in Titanic. FML

#19950905
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24448) - you deserved it (3349)

On 07/17/2012 at 5:11pm - love - by Alliente - United States

Today, a man on the bus questioned my sexuality for being a male nurse. I asked him what he did and he said he worked in a garage. When I pointed out that I work with sexy nurses all day and he works with sweaty guys, he punched me in the stomach. FML

#19743527
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35832) - you deserved it (5832)

On 06/06/2012 at 10:19am - misc - by Bishop (man) -

Today, I walked in on my dad introducing his stuffed gorilla to his cat. FML

#19625273
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19383) - you deserved it (2471)

On 05/14/2012 at 11:52pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, after several years of having her help me out by doing household chores, I bought my fifteen-year-old daughter a new pair of jeans. Her reaction was to squeal, "Master has presented Dobby with clothes. Dobby is free!" FML

#19463606
583 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13721) - you deserved it (55272) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 04/13/2012 at 10:06pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - France

Today, I was cleaning the windows at work and a guy walked in so I opened the door for him. After I opened the door, he stood there with his eyes closed and his arms open. I thought he wanted a hug so I hugged him. Apparently he wanted me to spray him with Windex. FML

#19409952
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20448) - you deserved it (2916)

On 04/05/2012 at 12:13am - work - by Kait - United States

Today, I was so baked out of my mind that I argued with my parakeet over who farted. I could be wrong, but I think I lost the argument. Worse still, my boyfriend had been standing in the doorway long enough to hear everything, even me farting. FML

#19406343
336 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7946) - you deserved it (36545)

On 04/04/2012 at 12:14pm - misc - by woohoo420 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, while I was cuddling with my girlfriend, she looked at me and leaned in. Thinking she was going to kiss me, I leaned too. Just as we were about to kiss, she screamed "COW KISSES" and somehow managed to lick my eyeball. FML

#19297004
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26681) - you deserved it (4433)

On 03/17/2012 at 10:32pm - love - by Brian - United States (Washington)

Today, my extremely OCD girlfriend wouldn't have sex with me because my bedroom wasn't "properly symmetrical." FML

#18623946
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30229) - you deserved it (6470)

On 12/27/2011 at 10:20am - intimacy - by gtfoocd (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, after rocking my one-year old daughter for nearly two hours, she finally fell asleep. As I went to leave her room, I stubbed my toe. I now have a broken toe, a screaming child, and a wife who will be so proud that her daughter's first word is "FUCK!" FML

Today, I and a policeman confronted my psychotic neighbor who stole my cat because she thinks flea bites cause cancer. She refused to tell us what she'd done with the cat. I just spent $100 last month in vet bills, and my kids are crying for their pet. He's probably in pieces in her freezer. FML

#18249265
236 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37945) - you deserved it (2266)

On 11/14/2011 at 7:46pm - animals - by Stalked (woman) - United States (Georgia)



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