Samuraiguy

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Samuraiguy

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 4 November 1982 (33 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 777
  • Number of comments : 16
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Samuraiguy : Awesome jewish guy

Samuraiguy's page activity

Visits<b>bloodberry23</b> - the 01/03/2015 at 9:21am<b>thischick113</b> - the 06/29/2014 at 1:01pm<b>sarah1024</b> - the 03/26/2014 at 7:07am<b>yerpitskaylee</b> - the 08/09/2013 at 1:10pm<b>AdamsNumberOne</b> - the 06/23/2013 at 1:15am<b>bluemaster101</b> - the 06/19/2013 at 10:16am<b>LeezaIsTheBest</b> - the 06/18/2013 at 10:48pm<b>DyslexicPanda</b> - the 06/18/2013 at 9:03pm<b>vb68</b> - the 06/18/2013 at 5:23pm<b>maosquare</b> - the 06/18/2013 at 4:20pm<b>jfreeman86</b> - the 06/13/2013 at 12:10am<b>swiggidyswag</b> - the 06/12/2013 at 2:49pm<b>BellaBelle</b> - the 06/08/2013 at 4:53pm<b>tbwilson</b> - the 06/04/2013 at 9:13am<b>iLike2Teabag</b> - the 06/04/2013 at 12:41am<b>xALEXx</b> - the 06/04/2013 at 12:30am<b>awkwardjellybean</b> - the 05/27/2013 at 6:02pm<b>dead_insects</b> - the 05/27/2013 at 4:25pm

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Samuraiguy's favorite FMLs

Today, my landlord emailed me, stating that she hasn't been receiving my rent. After some investigation, I found out she's been using the money to buy booze, and hasn't been putting it into the house owner's account. FML

by BrokeAsHell / 05/30/2013 at 4:51am / Australia (Victoria) / Money

Today, I was in bed with my fiancé. After a while of quiet cuddling, I said, "Babe, I have cold feet." He replied with, "Me too. Let's call off the wedding." I was talking about the actual temperature of my feet. Our wedding is tomorrow. FML

by anonymous / 05/26/2013 at 8:23am / Australia / Love

Today, I was helping my father-in-law out at a family barbecue. Somehow, the topic turned to grand-children, at which point I confessed that my wife has been having trouble conceiving. His response was to boom: "Sure you've been putting it in the right hole, son?!" FML

by um... maybe / 03/12/2013 at 6:43pm / United Kingdom / Kids

Today, my wife packed my lunch. Inside of my lunchbox was a photo of her eating my sandwiches. FML

by Anonymous / 03/01/2013 at 2:18am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to sneak out of work early to pick my 14-year-old son up from school. He and a friend had been found covered in Astroglide, racing each other down the corridor on their bellies. My boss noticed my absence from work, and now my son and I are both on suspension. FML

by Anonymous / 02/28/2013 at 7:15pm / United States (Colorado) / Kids

Today, my mother-in-law purchased matching Christmas presents for myself and my sister-in-law to open together in front of everyone. Guess who are now the proud owners of matching metal tampon cases. FML

by Shelle / 12/26/2012 at 3:53am / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke up after a few friends came over last night. There are eggs, coins and Oreos glued to the ceiling, 10 broken jars, no food left, and most of the contents of my house are in the garden. And I'm naked and covered in permanent marker drawings of Pokémon. My parents return in an hour. FML

by danii / 10/03/2011 at 9:19pm / Reserved / Miscellaneous

Today, I walked in on my daughter trying to tan herself with her regular desk lamp. She won't believe that it wouldn't give her a tan. She's 16 years old. This isn't the first time this has happened. FML

by Anonymous / 09/20/2011 at 3:24am / Canada (British Columbia) / Kids

Today, my five year old ran down the street wearing nothing but flip flops, Star Wars underwear, and a baseball helmet. He was swinging a badminton racket while screaming "THIS IS SPARTA!" My neighbors watched laughing as I had to run after him down the street in my pajamas. FML

by awesomekidsmum / 09/17/2011 at 9:20pm / Canada (Ontario) / Kids

Today, I accidentally asked a one-armed man which arm he wanted me to take blood from. He asked for a different nurse. FML

by ohmygosh / 07/21/2011 at 7:35pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Work

Today, I told my son that his grades are dropping and his behavior is getting out of hand. To which he replied, "Yeah, so is your weight." FML

by randa / 04/19/2011 at 2:38am / Kids

Today, my six year old told me I have a big nose. When I told her that she hurt my feelings, she laughed and said "Don't be silly mummy, ugly people don't have feelings." FML

by uglywoman / 12/14/2010 at 3:21am / Australia (Queensland) / Kids

Today, without even trying, I convinced my 17-year-old daughter that blueberries are just peas holding their breath. I have raised a complete airhead. FML

by parentfail / 12/11/2010 at 9:44am / United Kingdom / Kids

Today, I was on a bench enjoying the sun, when a guy comes and sits next to me. Next thing I know, he lets out a loud fart, then looks my way with pride. I stare back in shock. He then says to me, "Yeah, that just happened," and walks off. FML

by flying13 / 11/03/2010 at 3:27am / United States (Nevada) / Miscellaneous

Today, while walking to work, I accidentally dropped my $400 cell phone on the sidewalk. The screen shattered into a million pieces. A woman passing by looked at the ruined phone and said, "Now that's what you call a dropped call!" She laughed and kept walking. FML

by Cellismasher / 11/04/2009 at 5:37pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous