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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Sambo110

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Sambo110
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4625
  • Number of comments : 52
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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Today, while making out with my boyfriend, he started playing with my nipples. Suddenly he stops kissing me, looks at my nipples and says, "Have they always been like this? They look like joysticks!". He then started singing the Super Mario Brother's theme song and playing the game with my nipples. FML

#9086835 (241)

I agree, your life sucks (19044) - you deserved it (3543)

On 03/14/2010 at 10:09pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, while in bed with my game obsessed girlfriend, she told me I was a "noob" in bed. FML

#8455591 (284)

I agree, your life sucks (11223) - you deserved it (3845)

On 02/19/2010 at 8:47pm - intimacy - by anonymous - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, my very drunk mother decided to run down the block naked, screaming at the top of her lungs, "She's trying to kill me" as I followed behind her in my car, yelling for her to get in. FML

#8158295 (173)

I agree, your life sucks (22860) - you deserved it (1489)

On 02/12/2010 at 2:51am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)

Today, while I was in the middle of making love with my boyfriend, I mentioned bringing another lady in the picture to spice it up. He looked at me and said "let's ask your sister." He then got dressed and called her. FML

#6334893 (78)

I agree, your life sucks (5750) - you deserved it (14610)

On 11/16/2009 at 10:46pm - intimacy - by 3sacrowd (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, at my bachelorette party, I got so wasted, I ended up giving my stripper a lap dance because he "wasn't doing it properly". There's photos. FML

#5015078 (144)

I agree, your life sucks (6142) - you deserved it (33632)

On 09/03/2009 at 2:47am - misc - by sexyfreak2510 (woman) - South Africa (Gauteng)

Today, I was following my girlfriend up the stairs, I was pretty sure I was going to get lucky. As I was almost up the set of stairs, she lifted her skirt and revealed to me that she wasn't wearing any panties. I fell backwards down the stairs. FML

#4275637 (171)

I agree, your life sucks (34484) - you deserved it (13778)

On 08/04/2009 at 3:55am - love - by Ouchithurt (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, my boyfriend and I were cuddling on his couch when suddenly I tried to get up. Before I could stand, he grabs onto me and says, "I'm a koala and you're my eucalyptus tree!" He then continued to latch onto me for a good five minutes pretending to eat my hair. FML

#4046377 (746)

I agree, your life sucks (81749) - you deserved it (24055)

On 07/26/2009 at 1:57am - love - by treegirl (woman) - United States

Today, I tried to break up with my boyfriend. He said no. FML

#3991086 (384)

I agree, your life sucks (47711) - you deserved it (20011)

On 07/23/2009 at 10:26pm - love - by Ella (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was riding the subway to work. Barely anyone was on because of how early it was. Me and this one guy in a trench coat were in the same cart. His stop came. He walked by me, flashed me, rubbed his penis on my arm, and then ran away really fast. FML

#3268493 (298)

I agree, your life sucks (88403) - you deserved it (5295)

On 06/27/2009 at 4:20am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Japan

Today, my dog started to hump my leg. He always does this and I heard that humping in the dog world meant dominance. Well, I decided to instill my dominance and I dry humped him back. As I was doing this I said "How do you like that!" And then my mom walked in. FML

#2026481 (435)

I agree, your life sucks (22251) - you deserved it (97750)

On 05/17/2009 at 7:40pm - animals - by sucks (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was showing my new iPhone case to my friends, saying how it was scratchproof, shockproof, and waterproof. I demonstrated it by dropping it on the sidewalk from about 5 feet. It bounced onto the road. Apparently, its not truck-proof. FML

#2018927 (149)

I agree, your life sucks (9104) - you deserved it (69675)

On 05/17/2009 at 3:49pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I woke up to a hand rubbing my very erect penis, and a woman's peppermint breath in my ear. "Mom?" I called out instinctively, recalling how she always smells like peppermint. The hand stopped rubbing, and I turned to face my very disgusted looking girlfriend of three years. FML

#2005903 (233)

I agree, your life sucks (22858) - you deserved it (64741)

On 05/17/2009 at 2:42am - intimacy - by Ohshit (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my parents hosted a party at our house. After seeing one of the extremely beautiful guests, I went to masturbate in my room. When I was about to finish, my bedroom door opened suddenly. It was my mom showing around 10 party guests that our dog can open doors. FML

#1791192 (276)

I agree, your life sucks (18267) - you deserved it (59170)

On 05/09/2009 at 9:04pm - intimacy - by Jeremy (man) - United States (California)

Today, I came home from work and went to open the door. I Iooked in the window and saw a man in my house. Terrified, I called the police. They came, searched the house, and found nothing missing. I went back inside and looked through the window and saw him again. It was my reflection. FML

#1467567 (141)

I agree, your life sucks (8211) - you deserved it (54799)

On 04/29/2009 at 7:12pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I absentmindedly stuck two magnets in my mouth while talking, and accidentally swallowed them. I had to go the emergency room. The nurses at the station laughed at me. They thought it was a joke. They couldn't believe an 18 year old would swallow magnets. FML

#894059 (138)

I agree, your life sucks (7889) - you deserved it (53480)

On 04/09/2009 at 10:40pm - health - by clublulu (woman) - United States (Minnesota)