About Samandra : Tacos.
Mobility
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50 favourites
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
Consolation prize
Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
Today, after math class, the resident creepy kid approached me and asked me out. I've only spoken to him twice before, so I was creeped out, and I politely declined. He totally lost it, and shouted that I'm a "friend-zoning bitch" before storming out of the room. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16265) - you deserved it (2205)
On 09/14/2012 at 8:03pm - love - by wow kid just leave me alone (woman) - United States
Today, my five-year-old daughter asked me why moms don't swallow clothes, so that their babies won't be born naked. My husband burst into derisive laughter, and has now trained her into responding to the name "Derp-Derp." FML
I agree, your life sucks (17325) - you deserved it (1853)
On 09/14/2012 at 7:06pm - kids - by -___- (woman) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)
Today, after having a long talk with my mother about gays, she told me that she was totally open. I felt completely relieved, being gay myself. Seconds later, she said, "But not for you. I want you to find me a nice girl that can give me lots of grand kids." FML
I agree, your life sucks (19843) - you deserved it (3187)
On 09/13/2012 at 8:57pm - misc - by EvilMother (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, my 2-year-old cat finally decided to start catching mice. Like any other cat would, she left it for me to find. I found it in the middle of the night, as my bare foot rolled its guts out of its ass. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18280) - you deserved it (1361)
On 09/12/2012 at 2:31pm - animals - by shadokis (man) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I was pulled over. The cop stated that he "couldn't see" me because I had "blended in with the dark car background", and that it looked like no one was driving. I was literally pulled over for being black. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36512) - you deserved it (2906)
On 09/12/2012 at 3:00am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, my cousin suddenly confided in me that he had tried to commit suicide by overdosing when he was 17. Shocked and not knowing how to respond, I blurted out, "Did it work?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (6263) - you deserved it (19533)
On 09/12/2012 at 1:40am - misc - by hahagirl (woman) - United Kingdom
Today, I realized that my manager and I have synchronized menstrual cycles. She gets extremely bitchy, and I get extremely vulnerable and emotional - she yells at me and I burst into tears. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18618) - you deserved it (1250)
On 09/09/2012 at 8:39pm - work - by darawbs - United States
Today, I snuck out to go see my girlfriend. When I got to her house, I left my bike out front and we went on a nice walk around the block. We passed a homeless-looking woman going the opposite way. About ten minutes later, the same woman passed us, on my bike. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13326) - you deserved it (6774)
On 09/09/2012 at 1:38am - misc - by crabmunch15 - United States (California)
Today, my father bet me $200 that since my boyfriend is "such a stupid shit," he wouldn't be able to locate Paraguay on a map. I gladly accepted the bet. Not only did he not know where it is, he actually accused us of making the country up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14061) - you deserved it (9237)
On 09/08/2012 at 3:16pm - misc - by dating a fucking idiot (woman) - United States
Today, I realized how much it sucks to have the same name as my dad when I overheard my mom moan his name in bed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31125) - you deserved it (1395)
On 09/08/2012 at 7:38am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, my girlfriend dumped me because I didn't take her pet rock seriously. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17611) - you deserved it (3290)
On 09/05/2012 at 4:14am - love - by steve (man) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, a girl told me she stopped eating cherries ever since her father choked on one when she was a kid. She later mentioned that she doesn't like to drive. I sarcastically asked, "Did your dad choke on a car too?" Nope, her two brothers died in a car accident. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6298) - you deserved it (36237)
On 09/04/2012 at 12:24am - misc - by Cherrish it - United States (California)
Today, my girlfriend and I were having sex. I thought I'd be spontanous and spice things up, and gave her a spank across the butt. She started crying. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19715) - you deserved it (10825)
On 08/31/2012 at 5:31pm - intimacy - by jon (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my drunk boyfriend decided to try to serenade me by throwing rocks at my window and singing a song about how much he loves me. This would have been extremely sweet if he would have gotten my window instead of my dad's. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15946) - you deserved it (1547)
On 08/31/2012 at 6:16am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, I realised a second too late why trying to hack a popcorn kernel out from between your teeth with a steak knife is really a bad idea. FML
I agree, your life sucks (3722) - you deserved it (35099)
On 07/22/2012 at 6:45pm - misc - by fmyarse (man) - United Kingdom (Perth and Kinross)
Monday 20 May 2013
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