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SamSwebb

Offline (the 06/29/2015 at 2:00am) | Search for a member

SamSwebb

13Fucked!

SamSwebbSamSwebb
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 29 September 1992 (22 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 6421
  • Number of comments : 30
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About SamSwebb : Hi 👋

SamSwebb's page activity

Visits<b>styles829</b> - the 06/28/2015 at 4:50pm<b>FamousPeace</b> - the 06/24/2015 at 2:27am<b>w0nd3rl4nd</b> - the 06/20/2015 at 9:20am<b>seetei</b> - the 06/14/2015 at 1:04pm<b>missmorggan</b> - the 06/10/2015 at 2:58pm<b>Emi1y</b> - the 06/05/2015 at 11:31pm<b>PharmGirl14</b> - the 05/25/2015 at 2:31pm<b>becre8ve</b> - the 05/25/2015 at 12:31am<b>Defalt</b> - the 05/24/2015 at 7:24pm<b>kkorn051212</b> - the 05/18/2015 at 2:21am<b>random_funnygirl</b> - the 05/14/2015 at 12:40am<b>Darkness_Hate</b> - the 05/08/2015 at 2:44pm<b>vlalam</b> - the 04/20/2015 at 12:17pm<b>skiddymarker</b> - the 04/13/2015 at 9:31pm<b>aishah77</b> - the 04/13/2015 at 7:13am<b>qwertsarecool122</b> - the 04/03/2015 at 9:57pm<b>extrasnipes</b> - the 03/29/2015 at 7:04pm<b>mattzawesome</b> - the 03/28/2015 at 12:33am

Fucked!<b>seetei</b> - the 06/14/2015 at 7:03pm<b>Emi1y</b> - the 06/06/2015 at 5:32am<b>becre8ve</b> - the 05/25/2015 at 6:31am<b>random_funnygirl</b> - the 05/14/2015 at 6:40am<b>skiddymarker</b> - the 04/07/2015 at 7:48am<b>marctdiaz</b> - the 02/19/2015 at 8:23am<b>zBerryz</b> - the 02/17/2015 at 1:14am<b>StaceeeP</b> - the 02/17/2015 at 12:56am<b>Dylanlev05</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 6:26am<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 12/17/2014 at 4:40am<b>amamalfoy</b> - the 10/07/2014 at 6:15pm<b>dying_to_know</b> - the 10/06/2014 at 5:05am<b>FamousPeace</b> - the 10/06/2014 at 1:39am

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You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

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You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

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SamSwebb's favorite FMLs

Today, a weird friend of my father's decided to visit us. Our house isn't very big, so when he went to the bathroom, I could hear everything. He didn't wash his hands after a massive dump, and when he came out of the bathroom he patted my face. FML

Today, I found out that, due to the walls at my uni dorm being ridiculously thin, my entire flat overheard me lose my virginity. Spanking and all. FML

#21344108
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27855) - you deserved it (8380)

On 01/25/2015 at 5:10pm - intimacy - by Orgasmataz (woman) - United Kingdom (Manchester)

Today, I had a job interview. The interviewer blatantly farted as I sat down, then she sneered, "Making yourself comfortable, I see..." FML

#21344008
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29177) - you deserved it (2196)

On 01/25/2015 at 1:21pm - work - by fartje - Netherlands

Today, I noticed that my boyfriend's sister looks at my ass more than my boyfriend does. FML

#21343548
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27550) - you deserved it (3030)

On 01/24/2015 at 4:40pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, at dinner, my downstair's neighbors described how they can listen to most of my movements, including the buzz of my phone when I text late at night. I think all of us knew it is not my phone that vibrates at that time. FML

#21343273
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30690) - you deserved it (4658)

On 01/24/2015 at 2:57am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, during a family game of basketball, my 15 year old son shoved me hard to get the ball. I fell and cut my arm badly on the ground. I yelled at him for being an idiot. He replied "Oh jeez, a bleeding woman being a bitch, what a fucking shocker." My husband doubled over laughing. FML

#21342921
265 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38378) - you deserved it (6743)

On 01/23/2015 at 2:25pm - kids - by nosexforthee (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my asshat roommate tricked me into eating a weed brownie. I thought it was his terrible attempt at baking regular brownies until it kicked in at college. I was so high, I started giggling like a schoolgirl when my instructor said "Dickens". Now everyone thinks I'm a retard. FML

#21342882
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31431) - you deserved it (4432)

On 01/23/2015 at 1:12pm - misc - by Annomymous (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, thinking he was being so hilarious, my friend slipped me enough laxatives to make a horse shit its intestines out. I haven't been able to move from the toilet for over an hour. FML

#21341346
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31973) - you deserved it (2640)

On 01/20/2015 at 11:29pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I was playing Charades. My boyfriend, who I'd recently had a fight with, had trouble and just said his answer was the name of my celebrity twin. Nobody got it. He said "Really? It's Fat Bastard." Stunned silence followed, broken by a single "HAH." from my 'best friend'. FML

#21340816
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29538) - you deserved it (3398)

On 01/20/2015 at 6:04am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, just to win a bet against my mum that he could make me scream like a bitch, my dad faked his own suicide. He went the whole mile: fake blood everywhere, fake gun, yelling "Goodbye!" and playing a loud gunshot sound effect from his PC, everything. My dad won; my underwear lost. FML

#21339686
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39488) - you deserved it (3589)

On 01/18/2015 at 4:58pm - misc - by pissed out pants (man) - United Kingdom

Today, my boyfriend bought a new toaster. It not only pops up the bread when done, it also beeps loudly. It makes me scream in terror every single time. My boyfriend has now vowed to "Toast 'til the end of time." It's going to be a long year. FML

Today, my elderly neighbour told me why my other neighbours don't talk to me. I'm a massage/physical therapist and treat clients, mostly athletes, in my home. My neighbours saw the steady stream of young, buff guys coming to my house and concluded that I'm a gay prostitute. FML

#21327463
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33298) - you deserved it (2645)

On 12/30/2014 at 10:34pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)

Today, I slept on the plane ride home and had a scary nightmare. I started screaming in my dream, so loud that it shocked the old lady sitting next to me into screaming as well. The whole plane began laughing as we were both screaming. FML

Today, my mom got me a Christmas present. Since I'm a whovian, she thought it would be cool to get me what she thought was a sonic screwdriver. It was actually a dildo shaped as one. I opened the gift in front of my entire family. FML

#21323893
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33584) - you deserved it (3484)

On 12/25/2014 at 10:17am - intimacy - by whovian - United States (Maine)

Today, I witnessed my very overweight cat trying to jump over my fence, only to shit himself half way up, and then land in it. FML



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