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Mobility
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
50 favourites
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
It’s in the can
Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!
Today, I went to Victoria's Secret to get fitted for a new bra since mine weren't fitting properly. To my amazement, I wasn't a 32A, but a 32AA. I might as well have craters on my chest. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26683) - you deserved it (4372)
On 02/24/2011 at 5:09pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arkansas)
Today, my mom was snooping around my room, and found the unopened box of glow in the dark condoms I bought myself year ago. She laughed and said, "No takers yet, eh?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (26007) - you deserved it (12791)
On 02/24/2011 at 2:14pm - intimacy - by Animal (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I went to my son's high school play. The moment I arrived at the auditorium, I shouted out his name to let him know I made it. Thinking I was a student, a teacher yelled, "SHUT UP AND SIT DOWN!" Scared out of my mind, I quickly obeyed, to mass giggling from the kids. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10422) - you deserved it (22928)
On 02/24/2011 at 1:39am - kids - by Annie (woman) - United States (Tennessee)
Today, I asked for permission to marry the girl I love. Her father not only said no, he said "HELL no!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (24195) - you deserved it (3402)
On 02/22/2011 at 10:21pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, after some passionate love making with my husband, I accidentally farted on his leg. He shrieked and frantically began shaking his leg while screaming, "Get it off! Get it off!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (16306) - you deserved it (24429)
On 02/22/2011 at 4:02pm - intimacy - by CutieBooty (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I desperately tried to explain to my boyfriend why he shouldn't talk about the bible during sex. He honestly doesn't understand. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29372) - you deserved it (5547)
On 02/21/2011 at 6:15pm - intimacy - by Clare (woman) - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I finally taught my mom how to text message people. Now I get a message from her every 30 seconds saying "Hi". FML
I agree, your life sucks (20339) - you deserved it (11865)
On 02/21/2011 at 4:07pm - misc - by moweezy9 (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, my boyfriend walked in on me in the bathroom. That's how he found out that I wax my nipples. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20739) - you deserved it (20739)
On 02/21/2011 at 8:07am - intimacy - by weezer - United States
Today, my girlfriend called me and asked me if I wanted to have phone sex with her. We got into it. It took us 13 minutes to figure out my mom had been on the other line the whole time. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30329) - you deserved it (9992)
On 02/21/2011 at 12:01am - intimacy - by anonymous -
Today, I had my buddies over for a few beers and, trying to be cool, I told my wife to get out of the living room and back in the kitchen. I felt smug, right up until she said, "Why? Your mom doesn't need to be turned over for another 20 minutes, dick." FML
I agree, your life sucks (5534) - you deserved it (83515)
I agree, your life sucks (28239) - you deserved it (6191)
On 02/19/2011 at 8:12am - intimacy - by anonymous - United States (Texas)
Today, I dreamed I was getting married. I was wearing a white dress, had incredible cleavage and perfectly done makeup. Just one problem. I'm a guy. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40046) - you deserved it (7605)
On 02/14/2011 at 1:24am - misc - by bride (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I cleaned up my dog's crap after my wife asked me. 5 minutes later she yelled at me for being lazy as she slammed the door leaving for work. My dog shit in the exact same spot apparently to make me look stupid. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27096) - you deserved it (2441)
On 02/12/2011 at 9:17pm - animals - by Username - United States (Kentucky)
Today, I learned that ham is part of a pig, and not a completely different animal. I'm eighteen. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5663) - you deserved it (43237)
On 02/10/2011 at 5:37pm - misc - by acab93 - United States (Texas)
Today, I got a call from my daughter’s teacher asking me to come pick her up. My daughter wouldn’t tell her what was wrong. I left an important work meeting. When I got there she stated her boyfriend broke up with her and she couldn't emotionally make it through the rest of the day. She's 5. FML
I agree, your life sucks (45142) - you deserved it (5735)
On 02/08/2011 at 12:46pm - kids - by mom21 - United States (Wisconsin)
Monday 20 May 2013
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