Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

SalviBarbie

Offline (the 10/14/2014 at 7:20pm) | Search for a member

SalviBarbie

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1379
  • Number of comments : 14
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About SalviBarbie : I'm the one on the left in my profile pic.
Salvi is short for el salvadorian.
If you're on my bad side, you're stuck there. If you're on my good side, that can always change. Message me if you'd like, my mood always affects my replies.

SalviBarbie's page activity

Visits<b>SychoticFML</b> - the 12/12/2014 at 9:21pm<b>maxyutd</b> - the 11/27/2014 at 9:17pm<b>sweetbliss3</b> - the 11/27/2014 at 5:14am<b>Bryanb1306</b> - the 11/27/2014 at 3:01am<b>ccr386590</b> - the 10/14/2014 at 5:19pm<b>icekitten14</b> - the 10/12/2014 at 1:58pm<b>FanOfAnimations</b> - the 09/29/2014 at 6:04pm<b>saucetheman</b> - the 09/24/2014 at 12:16am<b>abattior</b> - the 09/21/2014 at 10:08pm<b>ricardof</b> - the 09/16/2014 at 2:10pm<b>HomelessDonut</b> - the 09/12/2014 at 8:30pm<b>icnburbbygrl</b> - the 09/11/2014 at 4:03pm<b>noway1987</b> - the 09/09/2014 at 1:25pm<b>abdiG</b> - the 09/07/2014 at 1:40pm<b>theoneandonlybro</b> - the 09/06/2014 at 12:44am<b>iHiccupBS</b> - the 09/05/2014 at 12:22am<b>Welshite</b> - the 09/03/2014 at 8:20pm<b>AirBusDriver</b> - the 09/03/2014 at 12:22am

SalviBarbie's FML badges

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

See all of SalviBarbie's badges

SalviBarbie's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to my new gynecologist. He has an eye twitch, and every time he asks about my genitals, he winks at me. FML

#21237829
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40120) - you deserved it (3238)

On 08/14/2014 at 11:35pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, I made fun of a girl singing passionately along to a song on her radio while in traffic next to me. She decided that her chocolate milkshake would make a good addition to my brand new seat covers. FML

#21237592
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15032) - you deserved it (72335)

On 08/14/2014 at 5:54pm - misc - by oops - United States (California)

Today, after having multiple dreams where I have a daughter with my boyfriend, I'm now emotionally attached to a child who isn't real, and I get depressed when I can't be with her in real life. FML

#21237524
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37680) - you deserved it (8263)

On 08/14/2014 at 3:50pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was chatting with the cute new receptionist at the gym. I told her that I would be going there more if she was there. She looked me up and down and said that I should go regardless. FML

#21237096
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34278) - you deserved it (14050)

On 08/13/2014 at 11:46pm - health - by fatty (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my professor told everyone that he thinks all med students should be required to get a catheter and an enema at least once in their lives so they can relate to their patients, saying, "Gentlemen, it might change your lives." FML

#21236595
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35859) - you deserved it (6485)

On 08/13/2014 at 11:19am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I went to a job interview, and a guy ahead of me went to enter the building, only to walk face-first into a glass door. I rushed to help him up, and after we had a good laugh about it, I turned to walk inside, only to walk straight into the door as well. FML

#21236025
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41215) - you deserved it (8849)

On 08/12/2014 at 5:23pm - health - by facefuckedguy (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I hooked up with a girl at a club, and we had sex. She just lay there like a corpse the whole time. It got so bad, I ended up faking an orgasm and blaming the lack of semen on a botched vasectomy. She actually believed it. What the hell? FML

#21235982
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40621) - you deserved it (9264)

On 08/12/2014 at 4:24pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, was the first day my grandma has seen me since I started going to tanning beds. She is now considering taking me out of her will because I look like "a damn Indian". FML

#21235555
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26159) - you deserved it (32668)

On 08/12/2014 at 2:07am - misc - by kirstyrd - United States (Michigan)

Today, after months of dinners, coffees, drinks, and a few nights together, the girl of my dreams told me about this awesome guy she met yesterday. FML

#21235196
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40515) - you deserved it (3990)

On 08/11/2014 at 8:34pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Indiana)

Today, a customer came into McDonalds and placed his order. He insisted on putting each coin on the counter rather than handing them straight to me, because he doesn't like touching "poor people". FML

#21234971
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45134) - you deserved it (3304)

On 08/11/2014 at 3:54pm - work - by poorman (man) - United States (California)

Today, my husband and I attended a funeral. After the service, my phone vibrated. It was a text from my husband, saying "I've got mourning wood like you wouldn't believe! get it? MOURNING. haha :D" I looked up and saw him across the room, winking at me. Not the place, honey. FML

#21234106
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48496) - you deserved it (5594)

On 08/10/2014 at 3:26pm - intimacy - by jackie89 (woman) - United Kingdom (Cornwall)

Today, my mother kicked me out of the house because her new boyfriend needs my room. Evidently he also needs my credit card, passport, and wallet too, because she kept all three, while tossing everything else out on the lawn. FML

#21234023
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46553) - you deserved it (2944)

On 08/10/2014 at 1:24pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Germany (Bayern)

Today, I called my boyfriend and invited him over to watch a movie. He was all for it, until I mentioned I was on my period, at which point he said "NOPE." and hung up on me. FML

#21234002
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39497) - you deserved it (6109)

On 08/10/2014 at 12:42pm - love - by painedandpissed (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I proposed to the love of my life by having the waitress place the ring in her dessert. She ate the whole thing and didn't find the ring. I guess the waitress stole the ring. FML

#21233475
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43124) - you deserved it (5605)

On 08/09/2014 at 7:03pm - love - by jakethemuss - Australia (Western Australia)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Xmas illustrated FML
  • Here we go, final lap before Christmas is finally upon us. Although, you could say we've been subjected to quite a few strains of Christmas already. The decorations are up since mid-August, and certain family…

Friday 19 December 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: