This member hasn't filled in their description.
SalsaVerdeDonut's FML badges
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.
You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
SalsaVerdeDonut's favorite FMLs
Today, the owner of the house I'm renting said he doesn't want to pay $4000 to fumigate the home, and that he'll take care of the issue himself. I have killed 30 angry wasps in the last hour. There are thousands living in the walls, but I think their favorite place is my bathroom and my bed. FML
by wasp infestation / 10/03/2016 at 12:54am / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 03/11/2016 at 5:09pm / United Kingdom (Hertford) / Intimacy
Today, my dad went to a hardware store to replace the broken shower head in my bathroom. He got the cheapest shower head he could find, and so when I took a shower, the shower head burst out and hit me square in the face. FML
by NoBasement4U / 11/26/2015 at 3:24pm / Canada (Alberta) / Money
Today, my roommate confided in me that she hadn't been taking showers while at school because she was afraid of being in the shower when the fire alarm goes off. She goes home once every month, and will only shower there. I have to live with her for the rest of the year. FML
by Utterly_Confused / 10/07/2015 at 6:07pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 07/31/2015 at 2:55pm / United States (California) / Animals
Today, I told my mom I was going hiking with a couple of friends and wouldn't be back for 4 or more hours. Not even 2 hours later, she called the cops and reported us as missing. She didn't realize that we wouldn't have service up the canyon so we could call her back. FML
by use your brain mother / 06/16/2015 at 1:47am / United States (Utah) / Miscellaneous
Today, I took the bus to work. A sweet old lady got on after and sat next to me. Halfway there, she fell asleep, her head on my shoulder. I gently tried to wake her up before my stop. She wasn't sleeping. I let a dead woman lie on me for 30 minutes. FML
by meteorbabe0101 / 04/13/2009 at 10:11pm / United States (Michigan) / Health
- « Previous page
- Next page »
- Today, my boyfriend whispered to me, “I’m so tired of these fucking mosquitos.” When I asked why he… Today, at lunch, my seven-year-old daughter and I had a chat. I asked her if she had a sweetheart.… Today, I’m on vacation in Peru in the Amazonian forest. I woke up in the middle of the night to the…