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Sal_Plissken

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Sal_Plissken

2Fucked!

Sal_PlisskenSal_Plissken
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1102
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Sal_Plissken : 18, a visionary robbed by fate. Look for your light, and keep it safe. I'm a listener, so if you need someone to talk to, I'll be there to listen. I don't hide the truth, so you can expect a sincere response at all times; it's not easy but someone has to do it. Don't let anyone else tell you who are, you make a name for yourself and you earn respect, if they don't want to respect it, reply in kind.

Sal_Plissken's page activity

Visits<b>GoldCyclone</b> - the 07/16/2015 at 11:07pm<b>macncheeze97</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 10:23pm<b>hotheadslav</b> - the 07/10/2015 at 6:49pm<b>yellosno</b> - the 06/16/2015 at 3:31am<b>Bazinga_1821</b> - the 05/09/2015 at 6:51pm<b>NikhilBajaj</b> - the 05/05/2015 at 10:49pm<b>tea_brewer</b> - the 05/04/2015 at 10:37pm<b>delilablue95</b> - the 03/29/2015 at 3:58am<b>kkkkkkkkkka</b> - the 03/29/2015 at 12:30am<b>tantanpanda</b> - the 03/26/2015 at 12:19am<b>hurtfeet</b> - the 01/03/2015 at 6:11am<b>123765</b> - the 11/12/2014 at 7:15pm<b>JMichael</b> - the 10/02/2014 at 3:16pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 08/12/2014 at 12:10am<b>itscare1217</b> - the 07/28/2014 at 1:50pm<b>letmehavemytea</b> - the 06/24/2014 at 10:21am<b>MrGauss</b> - the 04/13/2014 at 5:02pm<b>thelifelesson</b> - the 01/18/2014 at 11:46pm

Fucked!<b>GoldCyclone</b> - the 07/17/2015 at 5:07am<b>Bazinga_1821</b> - the 05/10/2015 at 12:52am

Sal_Plissken's FML badges

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

See all of Sal_Plissken's badges

Sal_Plissken's favorite FMLs

Today, after a 4 or 5 month-long dry spell, I woke up next to an amazing and beautiful woman. Neither of us were wearing pants. She looked me in the eyes and said, "Did I piss the bed?" FML

#21448401
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21950) - you deserved it (2559)

On 07/28/2015 at 2:44am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I got the last clean bowl out of the cupboard for a bowl of cereal. After I had finished, my family asked me if I had cleaned it first. It turns out that that specific bowl is apparently the dog's, and everyone just puts it back after feeding him. FML

#21447917
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24464) - you deserved it (4799)

On 07/27/2015 at 5:25am - misc - by NoOrdinaryNZer - New Zealand (Bay of Plenty)

Today, I went on a fabulous date with a really cute, smart, funny guy. He only mentioned his dad, so when I asked about his mom, I asked if they were divorced. She'd died of breast cancer so I felt awful. Then I asked if his dad had ever remarried. His stepmom had died of cancer too. FML

#21447547
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27135) - you deserved it (2161)

On 07/26/2015 at 2:15pm - love - by lextoast - Rwanda

Today, I was telling 3 classmates on Whatsapp about my depression. One of them told me to "nut up n grow a pear." 2 hours after we mocked him for being an illiterate jackass, one of us has had our car tires knifed and another's house has been egged. I'm terrified of what will happen to me. FML

#21446551
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21589) - you deserved it (4586)

On 07/24/2015 at 1:59pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - Northern Mariana Islands

Today, it was my first day working at a library. I expected it to be fun and peaceful, not to end up having to call the cops on a guy who started jerking off into a book. FML

#21446464
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24715) - you deserved it (1563)

On 07/24/2015 at 10:02am - work - by fishingforubies2 - Aruba

Today, over the course of three hours, I was burned by our toaster oven, hit in the head by a fridge door, hit my toes on a chair, clipped my hip on a table edge, and had both the washer and dryer lids slam on the same hand. I'm not sure what hurts more, my body or the shame. FML

#21446242
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24305) - you deserved it (3711)

On 07/23/2015 at 10:13pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, a girl called me a racist, stereotyping asshole. All I did was ask a kid who happens to be Asian to tutor me in math. Which I didn't do just because he's Asian, but rather because he's in college and is actually a brilliant mathematician. FML

#21443245
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27398) - you deserved it (1821)

On 07/17/2015 at 10:26pm - misc - by yep, she does have a tumblr (man) - United States (California)

Today, I witnessed the most awful park job ever. Without thinking, I found a piece of paper and wrote on the back, "Nice park, asshole". Turns out it was an old airline boarding pass, and my name, address and phone number were neatly displayed with the message. FML

Today, I went downstairs early in the morning to watch a movie. As I walked into the living room and reached for the light switch, I heard my dad say "Knew you'd change your mind. Get them panties off." followed by the sound of a zipper being undone. I've never been so mortified in my life. FML

#21442030
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33138) - you deserved it (2320)

On 07/15/2015 at 12:29pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, while walking alone through a sketchy neighbourhood after a party, I learned that I look too broke to even rob and "not worth the bother". Overhead from a guy waiting for me in a bush with a flashlight and his equally charming friend. FML

Today, most of my family was out of the house, so I took the opportunity to go to the bathroom and browse some porn. Five minutes later my sister comes and asks me to disconnect from bluetooth and that my "dinosaur noises" were blocking her and her friend's music. I'm currently hiding in shame. FML

#21441140
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22551) - you deserved it (10763)

On 07/13/2015 at 5:15pm - intimacy - by Nigel - United States

Today, during family therapy the therapist asked if I believe I'm a good parent/husband. When I said yes my two sons, my daughter and even my wife very passionately disagreed. FML

#21437483
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22657) - you deserved it (11061)

On 07/06/2015 at 4:52pm - kids - by --- - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my dad texted me, saying "My dicks so hard 4 u". I'm desperately hoping he meant to send that to his girlfriend instead. FML

#21434895
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29495) - you deserved it (1789)

On 07/01/2015 at 2:56pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) -

Today, my boyfriend called me while I was at work. He sounded very excited and told me he had a surprise for me. He doesn't usually do this kind of thing, so I was excited. When I came home, I found him naked, with "Bone Appetite" written right above his penis. FML

#21432853
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25973) - you deserved it (3361)

On 06/27/2015 at 2:37pm - love - by stillhungry - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend came back from her mission trip with hickies all over her boobs. She said it wasn't cheating because she was doing God's work and that they canceled each other out. FML

#21432849
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30388) - you deserved it (2317)

On 06/27/2015 at 2:29pm - love - by isaidfuckoff (woman) - United States



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