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Today, ma usband finally returned from is 18-mont deployment. Sexually starved, we wasted no time getting busy. Later as we finally cooled off, I got a message from ma Aunt. Se was iding in our closet teole time to surprise us wit cake for is safe return. FML
Today, mah friend an I were talking about the creepy stranger that usd to stalk me back in high school. I guess his looks changd a lot through the years cuz I found out that he's mah current boyfriend of 4 months. big fat FML
Today mah aunt drove to mah house an screamed at me fir skateboarding in her driveway an denting her car. She then ransacked mah room fir said skateboard so she could break it in half. My aunt lives 4 hours away. I don't own a skateboard. FML
while at hospital with a broken arm , I was askd to raise my hand onto the x-ray machine. I told the nurse I couldn't move it without extreme pain. She told me to suck it up , pickd up my arm , and droppd it on the machine. I could feel the bone completely separate. FML
TODAY, I WAS SO OUT OF IT FROM A LACK OF SLEEP AND AN ACCIDENTAL ANTIISTAMINE OVERDOSE, I TRIED TO OFFER MA CAT A CUP OF TEA, AND ACTUALLY GOT PISSED OFF WEN E DIDN'T REPLY. IT TOOK ME A GOOD FIVE MINUTES TO UNDERSTAND WAT JUST APPENED.
Today, I Was To Ave An Important Pone Interview 4 A Job. I Got A Call And Everyting Went Perfectly, And Tey Said I Was Ired. Later, I Found Out Tat One Of My "friends" Ad Gotten One Of Is Buddies To Prank Call Me And Make Sure Te Line Was Engaged Wen Te Real Interviewer Called. FML
Friday 27 March 2015