Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Sakeyaki

Search for a member

Sakeyaki

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 10 September 1991 (23 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 50500
  • Number of comments : 113
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 23 posted

About Sakeyaki : I go on here for shits and giggles.
I listen to Muse, Coldplay, Secondhand Serenade, Daft Punk, Franz Ferdinand, and Yellowcard.
I'm a senior in high school and I plan on going to college for Computer Science and MAYBE minor in web design.

And don't bother sending me shit about how you want to fuck me or how hawt I am, I'm taken. :I I get the same shit every day, kthx.

Sakeyaki's page activity

Visits<b>DuncanHills</b> - the 11/17/2014 at 6:27am<b>luckyme143</b> - the 11/15/2014 at 1:51pm<b>LOUNGE_LIZARD</b> - the 11/12/2014 at 7:28pm<b>LordGrew</b> - the 10/25/2014 at 4:10am<b>JackSkellingtons</b> - the 10/15/2014 at 6:11pm<b>Roaryah</b> - the 10/03/2014 at 6:51pm<b>Zman2017</b> - the 09/17/2014 at 8:50pm<b>alliegatorrrr</b> - the 09/02/2014 at 9:46am<b>Germrules</b> - the 08/20/2014 at 4:34pm<b>adamrjprice</b> - the 08/13/2014 at 11:04am<b>boomHEADSHOTllll</b> - the 08/11/2014 at 11:25am<b>Martijn1102</b> - the 07/25/2014 at 12:00pm<b>anothemy</b> - the 07/24/2014 at 3:05pm<b>Damafia</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 6:40pm<b>tshurtz722</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 1:41am<b>YoloTillIDie</b> - the 06/24/2014 at 4:37pm<b>RagingWill</b> - the 06/20/2014 at 1:02am<b>rabechan</b> - the 06/20/2014 at 12:08am

Sakeyaki's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

Sakeyaki's favorite FMLs

Today, my mother and I were driving through Del Taco. Instead of ordering "Macho Diet Coke", she said "Macho Diet Cock". After correcting herself and pulling up to the window, the employee who goes to my high school gave her the drink and his phone number. FML

#7898835
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23387) - you deserved it (2313)

On 02/05/2010 at 2:52am - misc - by MachoFluster (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was in the car with my 16 year old daughter. There was a guy on a fast looking motorcycle next to me at the stop light. I yelled to him to "get it up!" so that he would do a wheelie. Just before the light turned green he yelled back, "You're too old for me, but I'll get it up for her!" FML

#7897076
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7757) - you deserved it (26182)

On 02/05/2010 at 1:18am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, after pulling an all-nighter for my Bio final at 8AM and drinking 6 sodas, 3 energy drinks, and coffee throughout the night, an hour into the exam, I had to go to the restroom, so I get permission and go. I'm 1 of 3 people. They later find a cheat sheet in the restroom. Now I'm a suspect. FML

#6716496
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27230) - you deserved it (3747)

On 12/12/2009 at 12:00am - misc - by fuckbio (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was in a meeting at work. In the middle of our CEO's speech, I farted. Everyone heard including my boss, who looked over and said, "Do you have anything else you wanted to add?" FML

#6708463
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15493) - you deserved it (21284)

On 12/11/2009 at 1:11pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend and I were laying in his bed. I was watching the Terminator on T.V. A commercial came on in the middle of the movie. We just started having sex when the movie came back on he said "I'll be back." in the Arnold Schwartzenegger accent and rolled over to watch the movie. FML

#6705813
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17142) - you deserved it (3823)

On 12/11/2009 at 4:26am - intimacy - by Tee (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I woke up in my best guy friend's bed to the sound of him jerking off. As I laid there motionless with my back to him, he reached around me to grab a tissue. I don't think I can ever speak to him again. FML

#6676757
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20843) - you deserved it (4193)

On 12/09/2009 at 4:20am - intimacy - by dfkjhregoiuberiug (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, a cat came up to me on the pavement so I petted it a little. An elderly man rode past on his bicycle and shouted "I'd like to stroke your pussy too!" FML

#6367890
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25328) - you deserved it (3424)

On 11/19/2009 at 12:20pm - intimacy - by pussystroker (woman) - United Kingdom (Peterborough)

Today, I ran into a bird. Not with my car, with my face. It was so scared, it crapped all over me. FML

#6207441
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30636) - you deserved it (3131)

On 11/08/2009 at 2:26am - animals - by birdbath (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I had a police officer come to my house because I've been reported missing. My friends online decided to call the police because I haven't signed in for 6 days. FML

#6191568
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31806) - you deserved it (6025)

On 11/07/2009 at 1:55am - misc - by iheartvodka (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I was performing an experiment in science class. The prac required me to shake up a test tube filled with different materials. Taking the test tube in one hand, I shook it up and down. My teacher then stood next to me and said, "It's disturbing how good you are at that." FML

#6186656
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24458) - you deserved it (4809)

On 11/06/2009 at 8:02pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I was trying on dresses in a stall that requires an employee of the store to have a key to open. After I took off one dress to go to another, an employee quickly opens my door, to give the stall to someone else. The entire store could see me in my granny panties and bra. FML

#5631961
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30333) - you deserved it (5857)

On 10/03/2009 at 10:56pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I went to the doctors and was told I would need an inhaler. My mom came back from the pharmacy and told me the copay of $35 dollars was way too expensive, so she is making me use my cat's old inhaler. My mom values my cat's ability to breathe more then my own. FML

#5627700
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35398) - you deserved it (2195)

On 10/03/2009 at 7:17pm - misc - by juliasaman - United States (Washington)

Today, I was on a date with a guy having a great time. I went up to go to the ladies' room, but as I walked back to the table, I heard some giggles. I looked and found out why. My skirt was tucked into my underwear. I was wearing my lucky Star Wars-themed panties. FML

#5622961
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32122) - you deserved it (13733)

On 10/03/2009 at 2:41pm - love - by diva467 (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I wore a beautiful new dress that I got for £5 only in a sale. I've been turning heads in it all day. When I got home, my mum pulled the massive red £5 tag off of the back. FML

#5620277
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12265) - you deserved it (35245)

On 10/03/2009 at 11:38am - misc - by Adalia (woman) - United Kingdom (Bournemouth)

Today, during the opening night performance of our schools musical, while I wasn't on stage I decided to use the restroom. I came out to find two of my fellow actresses putting their hands over my mouth. Apparently, I had left my microphone on and everyone heard me using the restroom. FML



Emily Chan's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Emily Chan's Illustrated FML
  • This week, we landed a spacecraft on a comet. Not FML, though. You've got to admit that the human brain is quite amazing when it comes to resources, creativity and inventing new ways to push things forward. On…

Friday 14 November 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: