Sakeyaki

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Sakeyaki

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 10 September 1991 (24 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 52768
  • Number of comments : 113
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 23 posted

About Sakeyaki : I go on here for shits and giggles.
I listen to Muse, Coldplay, Secondhand Serenade, Daft Punk, Franz Ferdinand, and Yellowcard.
I'm a senior in high school and I plan on going to college for Computer Science and MAYBE minor in web design.

And don't bother sending me shit about how you want to fuck me or how hawt I am, I'm taken. :I I get the same shit every day, kthx.

Sakeyaki's page activity

Visits<b>invaginawethrust</b> - the 07/13/2016 at 6:00pm<b>Gwen4var</b> - the 07/07/2016 at 12:30am<b>meaganlo</b> - the 07/06/2016 at 1:26am<b>ebroks</b> - the 07/04/2016 at 1:29am<b>URBeingLied2</b> - the 05/09/2016 at 9:58am<b>Adjuss</b> - the 05/03/2016 at 5:51pm<b>analbeadlicker</b> - the 05/02/2016 at 2:33am<b>MRflyingplatypus</b> - the 04/10/2016 at 5:11am<b>racerboy102</b> - the 03/21/2016 at 12:15pm<b>ragnarok1540</b> - the 02/25/2016 at 4:45pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 02/16/2016 at 10:45pm<b>Cyrus00</b> - the 01/25/2016 at 9:15pm<b>0x48656C6C6F</b> - the 01/20/2016 at 2:56pm<b>lightningclicks</b> - the 12/15/2015 at 10:37pm<b>ridwaanrazak</b> - the 11/29/2015 at 12:00am<b>Genius_Kitty</b> - the 11/17/2015 at 12:30am<b>Zoldyck</b> - the 11/03/2015 at 11:46am<b>xadeel</b> - the 10/28/2015 at 1:57am

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 02/17/2016 at 4:45am

Sakeyaki's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

Sakeyaki's favorite FMLs

Today, I caught my dog attempting to shit on the carpet. When I saw him, I screamed. Startled, he ran around the house, continuing to take his shit. Now, I don't have to clean up a nice pile, I get to go on a scavenger hunt and find all of the scattered turds. FML

by Catois / 03/05/2010 at 12:17am / United States (Virginia) / Animals

Today, I came down with sudden diarrhea while at taekwondo practice. I discreetly called my dad for a pickup, but on our way out, he told my instructor that I had to go because I was "shitting my pants with fear". He did this in front of all my classmates. FML

by GoDiarrhea / 03/04/2010 at 1:52pm / Argentina (Distrito Federal) / Health

Today, I got a 95 on my term project. To congratulate me, my boyfriend said we're having sex tonight. I only get laid if I get good grades. FML

by lalararara / 03/04/2010 at 10:48am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I found out exactly what Ducolax stool softener is all about. Holy colon cleanse Batman! FML

by Username / 03/03/2010 at 11:34am / Health

Today, I finally felt ready to take my bra off during sex. My breasts had "deflated" somewhat due to weight loss and I was really self-conscious about them, but my boyfriend insisted I was hot no matter what. When the bra came off, the dick got soft. FML

by victoriassecret / 03/03/2010 at 4:24am / United States / Intimacy

Today, a really hot guy smacked my ass. I farted. FML

by Anonymous / 03/01/2010 at 5:04pm / United States (Georgia) / Love

Today, I parked and noticed a car that was identical to mine across from me. I thought it was an amusing coincidence until I came back to find both cars trashed. At least the vandal realized their mistake and left a note saying, "You deserve it for having the same car as that cheater, asshole!" FML

by GuiltByTenuousAssociation / 03/01/2010 at 8:17am / United States (Massachusetts) / Transportation

Today, after finalizing my divorce, I decided to go out with a guy I had been ogling for months, after much anticipation and a few rounds of drinks at the bar, I was ready to roll. Much to my disappointment, his penis was so small the condom wouldn't stay on. FML

by Lovejunkie / 03/01/2010 at 2:30am / United States (Oklahoma) / Intimacy

Today, a wild squirrel managed to get into my house. I can't see him but I hear him in the walls. FML

by Anonymous / 02/28/2010 at 6:16am / Canada (Ontario) / Animals

Today, I was with my friend and her entire family at a restaurant. While we were eating, her brother who is really cute asked what "brown sauce" is. I said thats probably 'penis' sauce. I'd meant to say 'peanut sauce' but the damage was done. The entire family just stared. FML

by princess4242 / 02/26/2010 at 4:10am / India (Delhi) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was working at Publix ringing up some 70 year old woman. She says "Man, you're a fast cashier, I like my men fast!" and then gives me a wink. I got really nervous and didn't know how to respond, so not thinking, I quickly said, "Yeah, me too." FML

by Patrick / 02/22/2010 at 8:29pm / United States (Florida) / Work

Today, I lied to my crush telling him I can play the piano. To 'prove' it, I recorded a video on my phone of a girl playing a beautiful piece. After I sent it, I realized my mouse cursor was in the center of the page the entire time. FML

by Piano999 / 02/21/2010 at 2:41am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I hung out with the guy I've liked for the first time in 3 years. And when he left, I gave him a hug, he pushed me, I tripped, and hit my head into the wall. Then to save his embarassment, pushed me over onto the couch and pretended to rape me. FML

Today, I went to the hospital to get my ingrown toenail removed. The doctors put me on a little surgery table and told me to relax. They then injected anesthetic into my toe four times and used a pair of scissors to slowly cut through my nail. Only, the anesthetic hadn't started to work just yet. FML

by papertrains / 02/20/2010 at 10:13am / Singapore / Health

Today, while in bed with my game obsessed girlfriend, she told me I was a "noob" in bed. FML

by anonymous / 02/19/2010 at 8:47pm / Ireland (Dublin) / Intimacy