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Sabraynay's favorite FMLs
by Sammylad / 09/07/2011 at 6:14pm / United Kingdom (London) / Work
by abby181 / 09/03/2011 at 10:36am / United States (Colorado) / Kids
Today, I went to a restaurant with a girl I really liked. She started crying when an overweight family walked in and loudly sobbed about how the parents were "murdering" their children. This made the father of that family try to fight me. FML
by whatdidIdo / 09/03/2011 at 1:33am / United States (New Hampshire) / Health
by CHStennis_4 / 09/03/2011 at 12:48am / United States (Utah) / Love
Today, my report card finally came in. My mom took one look at it and told me that if I'm not going to take my grades seriously, I might as well start looking for a sugar daddy. But first, I apparently need to work on prettying myself up. FML
by tryingtobepretty101 / 09/02/2011 at 12:58pm / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous
by mannydanny / 09/01/2011 at 7:40pm / United Kingdom (Coventry) / Miscellaneous
by Bigpoppa0507 / 08/31/2011 at 10:02am / Canada / Health
by piece of shed / 08/31/2011 at 10:00am / United States (New York) / Kids
Today, I excitedly showed my new roommate my pet fish. She then told me about how she purposely starved her last fish to see how long it would take before they started eating each other before starving to death. FML
by Anonymous / 08/27/2011 at 6:59pm / United States (Arkansas) / Animals
by Alexis / 08/26/2011 at 7:32pm / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous
Today, I had to take my dog to the vet for him to be put to sleep. I could feel the cold, hard shaft of irony slide its way up my ass and slowly fuck me senseless with every step I took on this beautiful National Dog Day. FML
by Anonymous / 08/26/2011 at 1:49pm / United States / Animals
Today, I learned that the "If I can't see you, you can't see me." rule is entirely false. Just because I can't initially see my creepy neighbor, doesn't mean he isn't watching me change my clothes through the blinds. FML
by Peekaboo / 08/26/2011 at 1:25pm / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous
Today, I got a text message from a number I don't know saying "I'm sorry, but I'm cheating on you, I couldn't do this in person because you're ugly when you cry." I haven't had a relationship in 6 years and I still manage to get dumped. FML
by j_babydoll6520 / 08/26/2011 at 7:09am / Australia (Victoria) / Love
by EpicMayonnaise / 08/26/2011 at 3:35am / United States (Texas) / Love
by skichick54 / 08/24/2011 at 1:28am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous
- Today, I woke up from a dream in which I was making passionate love with a beautiful woman. The bad… Today, after months of planning & asking her father permission, I proposed to my girlfriend of five… Today, my boyfriend once again accused me of cooking food with too much fat, making him gain 35 lbs…