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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 12 February 1991 (25 years old)
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 1080
  • Number of comments : 73
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 10 posted

About SW500 : I eat socks. Don't judge me!

SW500's page activity

Visits<b>sonasonic</b> - the 04/15/2016 at 11:57pm<b>Cakeslovespans</b> - the 11/08/2015 at 10:33pm<b>Colden_H</b> - the 01/14/2015 at 7:19pm<b>hduebdo</b> - the 11/20/2014 at 10:31pm<b>ILoveHashtags</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 1:13am<b>ireply_wlyrics</b> - the 05/10/2014 at 3:58pm<b>AnonymousFunFMLs</b> - the 05/04/2014 at 10:36pm<b>teotsi</b> - the 02/09/2014 at 12:45am<b>emmawu</b> - the 02/06/2014 at 5:19am<b>jetsown08</b> - the 12/22/2012 at 11:43am<b>j_js182</b> - the 10/15/2012 at 7:11am<b>freeturnedslave</b> - the 07/03/2012 at 8:31am

SW500's FML badges

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SW500's favorite FMLs

Today, after falling on my way out the door, hitting a bird with my car, and sitting in an hour and a half of traffic, I remembered I had the day off work. FML

Today, my grandmother sat me down and gave me a talk about the importance of personal hygiene. According to her, it's important that I shower twice a day, because "Fat people tend to have a most curious smell about them." FML

by Username / 08/19/2011 at 8:22pm / United States / Health

Today, I went to court expecting to walk out a free man. Turns out my misdemeanor offense couldn't compare to the crime I committed when I walked into the court house with a switchblade tucked into my shoe. FML

by Tom / 08/17/2011 at 2:27pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I took my new boyfriend to a family dinner. Despite having made everyone agree to be on their best behavior, my grandma spewed obscenities such as "fuck me sideways, aren't you a catch?" and "you just can't pull ass like that at my age" throughout. FML

by moonstone15 / 08/05/2011 at 8:24pm / United States (Arizona) / Intimacy

Today, I had drunk sex with a girl that I barely know. I didn't have a condom and was nervous about getting her pregnant, but she assured me that I could pull out. Right when I was about to pull out, she wrapped her legs around me and yelled, "BE MY BABY'S DADDY!" I couldn't get out in time. FML

by RC3Welly / 03/09/2009 at 6:58pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy