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STP907

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STP907

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 5 September 1994 (19 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 569
  • Number of comments : 20
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About STP907 : I hate the people on this website who write a fucking book for a comment. Lets try and keep it to a minimum here people, and truthfully, no one really cares about your advice.

Now that that's out of the way, I'm generally pretty easy going. Message me if you want, although I rarely use the computer so it might take me a while to respond.

"Think of how stupid the average person is, then realize half of them are stupider than that."-George Carlin

STP907's page activity

Visits<b>LovelyStones</b> - the 07/24/2014 at 3:13pm<b>rabbittboi</b> - the 11/27/2011 at 3:05am

STP907's FML badges

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

See all of STP907's badges

STP907's favorite FMLs

Today, while I was driving home, some jackass in an open-top sports car overtook us and flipped me off. Just as I overtook him in turn, my wife rolled down her window, pulled out her tampon, and launched it at the kid. I'm not sure who was more horrified: me or him. FML

#19793582
401 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37115) - you deserved it (3994)

On 06/15/2012 at 6:13pm - misc - by 16590 (man) - Sweden

Today, I went to see a movie with my girlfriend and a few others. Mid-way through, I noticed my girlfriend giving a hand-job to my best friend. I couldn't believe my eyes, and I confronted them. He claimed he had been asleep, she claimed she was mopping up a spill, and I'm now single again. FML

#19788440
288 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49609) - you deserved it (3358)

On 06/14/2012 at 6:51pm - intimacy - by aranya (man) - Netherlands (Overijssel)

Today, my face got intimate with several plywood boards, and I suffered lacerations and bruising. I told my friends I got the wounds from taking a few guys down in a bar fight. Now they're dragging me out into a rough part of town to give them "muscle" while they try to score some crack. FML

#19787973
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6441) - you deserved it (38129)

On 06/14/2012 at 4:59pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Croydon)

Today, my husband and I were pulled over by a cop. He was still angry from our earlier argument over his constant freeloading, and when the cop told him we'd been doing 75 in a 55, he retorted, "Yeah? I did 75 in your mom last night, fuzzball." One more ticket I have to pay for. FML

#19644251
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23303) - you deserved it (4749)

On 05/18/2012 at 10:41pm - money - by me (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I had to collect my daughter from the hospital. Her boyfriend was even more upset than she was, because his iPhone's screen was damaged beyond repair when the doctor pulled it out of my daughter's vagina. FML

#19631928
472 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47061) - you deserved it (4367)

On 05/16/2012 at 12:10pm - intimacy - by smart move there (woman) - Ireland (Kildare)

Today, my boyfriend cuffed my legs to the bed. After the sex we discovered one of the cuffs wouldn't open. After an hour of trying to pry them open, I had to waddle with him to the fire station to have them removed in front of 4 amused firefighters. FML

#19576314
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21504) - you deserved it (7792)

On 05/05/2012 at 8:07am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Israel (Tel Aviv)

Today, I was working at the local liquor store. An obviously drunk girl stumbles in, grabs two cases of beer and puts them on the counter. Then she grabs a pregnancy test, pees on it right there, shows me, and says, "I'm not pregnant, I want beer." FML

#19572319
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30446) - you deserved it (1911)

On 05/04/2012 at 8:08am - work - by viviham - United States (Texas)

Today, I discovered that last night, my son snuck downstairs at 3am, drank two glasses of my very expensive wine, threw up on his bed, and then slept in his own vomit. My son is 14. FML

#19517989
211 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29539) - you deserved it (5440)

On 04/23/2012 at 6:51pm - kids - by sadmommy - United States (Texas)

Today, I woke up to a really cold feeling down below. I opened my eyes and saw my girlfriend grinning like a maniac and holding my crotch-sausage between two scissor blades. I screamed in terror like a little bitch, and she says I'm never gonna live this down. FML

#19506149
425 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41822) - you deserved it (3824)

On 04/21/2012 at 1:38pm - intimacy - by Hakimstah (man) - Lebanon

Today, while my mom was driving me to work, we drove past a lake with an old wooden dock. She stopped the car, pointed and said, "Some guy fucked me right there. I got a splinter in my butt, though, so we finished in his car." FML

#19443097
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36057) - you deserved it (2783)

On 04/10/2012 at 1:47pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I'm recovering from colon surgery. They gave me codeine as pain relief, which has made me constipated. I'm currently sat on the toilet, trying to push out what feels like a small child wrapped in barbed wire out without busting my stitches. FML

#19405476
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28776) - you deserved it (1694)

On 04/04/2012 at 6:13am - health - by screaming monkey - United Kingdom (Windsor and Maidenhead)

Today, I was babysitting this 12 year old. We were watching a movie, and he was being an angel just laying with his head in my lap. He fell asleep so I closed my eyes and had a little nap. When I woke up he had taken my shirt off and was feeling up my boobs. FML

#19343662
362 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39335) - you deserved it (12170)

On 03/25/2012 at 8:09am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I met my girlfriend's parents. Her huge, ex-Marine father took me out back, saying he wanted to show me something. That something was a machete. He savagely buried it in a tree stump and said, "Son, if you break my daughter's heart, that'll be your dick." FML

#19279132
240 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32821) - you deserved it (5843)

On 03/14/2012 at 9:06pm - intimacy - by PUA - United States (Georgia)

Today, while making my daily offering of turd to the porcelain throne, I took out my phone and started playing a game. I suddenly felt a tickling sensation on my leg, and I freaked out as I saw hundreds of ants had emerged from behind the toilet. FML

#19215354
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28852) - you deserved it (3820)

On 03/04/2012 at 5:20pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I found out that the pool boy has been stealing from me for over a year now. The latest things that he has taken are my laptop, the cash I hide in my closet and my wife. FML

#19092869
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36682) - you deserved it (3739)

On 02/16/2012 at 11:26am - misc - by mypoolisstilldirty (man) - Australia



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