Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

SS99

Offline (14 hours ago) | Search for a member

SS99

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2545
  • Number of comments : 82
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 9 posted

About SS99 : Ummm not much to say. I wrestle and am just a generally friendly person :) I like to talk and meet new people so message me anytime!have a great day!

SS99's page activity

Visits<b>drew60</b> - the 09/07/2014 at 11:54pm<b>awishadahbau5</b> - the 09/01/2014 at 10:43am<b>Rozza17</b> - the 08/23/2014 at 4:39am<b>Maria_BVB_Army</b> - the 08/19/2014 at 8:08pm<b>AE101</b> - the 08/19/2014 at 1:50pm<b>Mons</b> - the 08/06/2014 at 5:49am<b>BBlah</b> - the 08/03/2014 at 8:03pm<b>Bradddd</b> - the 08/03/2014 at 4:58am<b>katherhinooo</b> - the 07/30/2014 at 11:58pm<b>delhh</b> - the 07/17/2014 at 4:55pm<b>travelfreak</b> - the 07/16/2014 at 10:32am<b>Miss_Brii</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 6:26am<b>GirlGamer12345</b> - the 07/06/2014 at 11:04pm<b>krupa1017</b> - the 07/05/2014 at 8:57am<b>xDochx</b> - the 07/02/2014 at 11:49pm<b>beatlesgirl2u2</b> - the 06/30/2014 at 5:22pm<b>RaspberryFlower</b> - the 06/25/2014 at 8:37pm<b>Xotoolyxo</b> - the 06/20/2014 at 11:41am

SS99's FML badges

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

See all of SS99's badges

SS99's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out that my girlfriend had replaced our picture in her locket for a picture of Taylor Lautner shirtless. FML

#7724225
258 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32383) - you deserved it (5535)

On 01/30/2010 at 10:20pm - love - by Twilightsux (man) - United States

Today, I was spooning with my wife when I said, "It's cold tonight." Previously when I used that line, my wife would respond by saying, "I know how to warm you up" and we would make love. Tonight, she said "I know how to warm you up" and farted on me. FML

#7293990
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25434) - you deserved it (8116)

On 01/12/2010 at 1:30am - intimacy - by cold-n-stinky (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I found out that I have been declared dead by my credit card company in England because I haven't used it since I moved to Thailand last year. I will need three witnesses to convince them that I am actually alive. FML

#7167765
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26866) - you deserved it (2183)

On 01/05/2010 at 7:02pm - money - by Arsinoe (woman) - United Kingdom (Reading)

Today, I was playing with my yo-yo. I began showing off to my friends. When the girl I liked walked by, I thought it'd be really cool to do the move "dog bite". I ended hitting myself in the balls. Hard. FML

#6792186
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6933) - you deserved it (31965)

On 12/17/2009 at 11:34am - misc - by owmyballs - Thailand (Krung Thep)

Today, my mom revealed to me that when I was in Preschool, I used to get caught in the bathroom with little boys while I was feeling their "no no" area. I was giving hand jobs to boys before I could read. FML

#6768891
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28256) - you deserved it (6930)

On 12/15/2009 at 9:20pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, while driving, I witnessed the neighbors dog viciously shaking a black cat. So I slammed on the brakes and jumped out of the car, frantically chasing around the huge dog screaming "Help, someone please help!" I finally managed to tackle him and release the cat. It was a stuffed animal. FML

#6659884
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10662) - you deserved it (28446)

On 12/08/2009 at 1:26am - animals - by damncat (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my mom said I was the worst of her 5 children. My IQ is 130, an honor student, I don't smoke, I don't drink alcohol, or do drugs. I'm the "worst" because I don't go to church every Sunday. FML

#5791977
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44123) - you deserved it (9761)

On 10/12/2009 at 4:23am - misc - by worst (man) - Philippines (Quezon City)

Today, I had to pretend to give birth in a play. I wanted to make it a realistic as possible but ended up crapping myself on stage by accident. FML

#5774504
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52938) - you deserved it (26872)

On 10/11/2009 at 11:42am - misc - by oxjessiiox (woman) - United Kingdom (Leicestershire)

Today, my best friend and I went to the movies. There was a hot cashier, so I thought it would be cool to talk in a British accent to try and be sexy. I walked up and started talking when he interrupted me and said in a very heavy British accent, "I know you're faking. You can stop now." FML

#5752857
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6905) - you deserved it (53041)

On 10/10/2009 at 2:10am - work - by dammitt (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I found out that my sister who is 16 years older than me is actually my biological mother. She and my parents decided it was best that I didn't know who my real mother was, and to be raised by my grandparents as their child. I've always hated my sister. FML

#5701860
314 comments

I agree, your life sucks (164238) - you deserved it (8184)

On 10/07/2009 at 12:07pm - misc - by dinosaurman (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, while talking online with my boyfriend, the conversation turns sexual. He stops responding but I continue with the conversation. Then I get a response: "this is his sister. He fell asleep and I need the computer. I'll tell him you said goodnight, but not that other stuff". FML

#5266141
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22566) - you deserved it (7026)

On 09/15/2009 at 12:44am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, my daughter used the kids potty chair on her own for the first time. Bad: The bucket was not in it so poo hit the floor. Good: she tried to clean it... Bad: with her socks. Good: she decided to clean the socks. Bad: she used the wall. Good: she finally called dad. FML

#5164209
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45180) - you deserved it (4262)

On 09/10/2009 at 3:51am - kids - by Udxero (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was going to ask this girl I love to homecoming. I set up a scavenger hunt, and my friend led her through it. At the end of the scavenger hunt I had a note that said, "Homecoming?" She said yes and hugged my friend. When I told her it was me who was asking, she laughed and said no. FML

#5058289
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43402) - you deserved it (9438)

On 09/05/2009 at 10:16am - love - by thisrllysucks (man) - United States (Kansas)

Today, I was walking with my boyfriend down the street and a really hot guy walked past with no shirt on. While distracted by his hardened stomach muscles, I promptly walked into a pole, then became single. FML

#4994498
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13801) - you deserved it (64267)

On 09/02/2009 at 5:21am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia



FML's blog

  • Gragrou's illustrated FML
  • One day, cats will rule the world, but not today, there's a bit of tin foil stuck under the couch. The Internet and cats is quite the love story, everybody knows that. A very serious study that was done…

Friday 26 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: