Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

SS99

Offline (the 08/26/2014 at 1:53am) | Search for a member

SS99

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2397
  • Number of comments : 82
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 9 posted

About SS99 : Ummm not much to say. I wrestle and am just a generally friendly person :) I like to talk and meet new people so message me anytime!have a great day!

SS99's page activity

Visits<b>Rozza17</b> - the 08/23/2014 at 4:39am<b>Maria_BVB_Army</b> - the 08/19/2014 at 8:08pm<b>AE101</b> - the 08/19/2014 at 1:50pm<b>Mons</b> - the 08/06/2014 at 5:49am<b>BBlah</b> - the 08/03/2014 at 8:03pm<b>Bradddd</b> - the 08/03/2014 at 4:58am<b>katherhinooo</b> - the 07/30/2014 at 11:58pm<b>delhh</b> - the 07/17/2014 at 4:55pm<b>travelfreak</b> - the 07/16/2014 at 10:32am<b>Miss_Brii</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 6:26am<b>GirlGamer12345</b> - the 07/06/2014 at 11:04pm<b>krupa1017</b> - the 07/05/2014 at 8:57am<b>xDochx</b> - the 07/02/2014 at 11:49pm<b>beatlesgirl2u2</b> - the 06/30/2014 at 5:22pm<b>RaspberryFlower</b> - the 06/25/2014 at 8:37pm<b>Xotoolyxo</b> - the 06/20/2014 at 11:41am<b>ronak</b> - the 06/19/2014 at 11:13am<b>kitcat517</b> - the 06/18/2014 at 3:01pm

SS99's FML badges

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

See all of SS99's badges

SS99's favorite FMLs

Today, my parents asked me if I was sexually active. My grandma then screamed from upstairs, "She's not even physically active!" FML

#20548943
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48217) - you deserved it (14392)

On 03/18/2013 at 4:59am - intimacy - by Susan (woman) - Ireland

Today, a technician from my ISP came to my house to replace my router. He asked for a glass of water, one thing led to another, and for some reason I'll never fully understand, we ended up having sex. Looks like porn logic is not so far off the mark after all. FML

#20537010
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20473) - you deserved it (59844)

On 03/09/2013 at 1:50pm - intimacy - by je_regrette_tout (woman) - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was making out with my girlfriend, and after a while, she moved her hand down to my crotch. She felt my erection, then got up and yelled at me, calling me a horny pig for "assuming we were going to have sex." FML

#20527203
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61424) - you deserved it (5376)

On 03/01/2013 at 5:54pm - intimacy - by sn-511 (man) - Italy (Campania)

Today, I was at a club when a notoriously desperate and disgusting guy asked me to grind with him. Hoping for some backup, I coolly said, "You'll have to ask my boyfriend." My boyfriend's response? "Yeah, man, I don't care." FML

#20513337
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32827) - you deserved it (7604)

On 02/19/2013 at 10:27am - misc - by really (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I was getting a haircut. The lady accusingly told me she'd have to thoroughly wash my hair before she started, as it was way too greasy to cut through. FML

#20473123
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9071) - you deserved it (41634)

On 01/22/2013 at 2:18pm - misc - by Whoops (man) - United Kingdom

Today, after applying for a job at a tanning salon, I was told they don't hire "naturally tan" people. I'm black. FML

#20470936
209 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46369) - you deserved it (3961)

On 01/21/2013 at 7:48am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Maryland)

Today, my hubby asked for a morning blow job, and I happily obliged. All was going great until he came and farted at the same time. I laughed and reassured him it was no big deal. He cried. FML

#20470929
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48551) - you deserved it (5851)

On 01/21/2013 at 7:36am - intimacy - by airbiscuit (woman) - United Kingdom (Cardiff)

Today, on my job as a police officer, I received a typical domestic disturbance call. Not so typical was the address. Guess my wife's affair went terribly wrong while I was on shift. FML

#20155904
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39893) - you deserved it (1818)

On 11/09/2012 at 2:18am - love - by SebastianMiko (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I texted my boyfriend saying that I couldn't wait for him to get home and see my costume, and that I had dressed up as a naked lady. He texted back asking if I could dress up as someone who was making dinner instead. FML

#20142541
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30570) - you deserved it (6483)

On 11/01/2012 at 3:54am - intimacy - by okay._. - United States (California)

Today, I decided to watch some porn to cheer myself up after having recently been dumped. Halfway through wanking the gibbon, I got a horrifyingly painful cramp in my foot, and cried out in pain. Ten seconds later, with my pants still down, my dad rushed in to see if I was okay. FML

#20135660
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24227) - you deserved it (13650)

On 10/27/2012 at 3:18pm - intimacy - by whoreticulturalist (man) - United Kingdom (Plymouth)

Today, I woke up and found a little note where my husband should have been. It said, "We've had some good times, hun, but it's time for me to move on." We've been married for 15 years, and have 3 children. FML

#20121146
239 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40724) - you deserved it (2141)

On 10/17/2012 at 4:16pm - love - by AbandonedHouseWife - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I walked in on my boyfriend and best friend making out. His explanation was that he was trying to stop her from having an allergic reaction to peanut butter. FML

#20118571
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24724) - you deserved it (1596)

On 10/15/2012 at 8:04pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)

Today, I choked on a gummy bear and ended up in the emergency room. The first thing the doctor said to me was, "Well, that must have been 'beary' uncomfortable." The entire room burst into laughter. FML

#19222956
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25135) - you deserved it (7712)

On 03/05/2012 at 7:43pm - health - by Kayla - United States

Today, my girlfriend got a necklace from one of her guy friends. She loves it. It's a heart shaped necklace. She doesn't see a problem. FML

#17496847
297 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38890) - you deserved it (6169)

On 08/17/2011 at 2:19am - love - by CashChamp20 - United States

Today, I'm too sunburned to masturbate. Now I have nothing to do. FML

#16432194
267 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20493) - you deserved it (63933)

On 05/31/2011 at 7:21am - intimacy - by Anonymous -



FML's blog

  • Jim Trim's Illustrated FML
  • Action stations! I'm back from my holiday, I've got some sort of weirdly uneven tan and I already want to go back to the beach to bum about and finish off my colouring book. But I can't. I'm still…

Friday 29 August 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: