SLSmith0815

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Offline (the 05/21/2015 at 5:41am)

SLSmith0815

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 15 August 1950 (66 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1239
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About SLSmith0815 : Hehe

SLSmith0815's page activity

Visits<b>SauceySarah</b> - the 07/25/2014 at 4:27am<b>BexBaby86</b> - the 07/24/2014 at 1:56pm<b>worldclassrager</b> - the 07/24/2014 at 1:44am<b>Toutejulie</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 5:54pm

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SLSmith0815's favorite FMLs

Today, at work, an old man was having trouble using his credit card at the checkout. I told him to "just stick it in", and he replied with "I love it when you talk dirty to me." The whole line at the checkout laughed. FML

by Anonymous / 08/03/2014 at 1:16am / Australia (Western Australia) / Work

Today, upon arriving at a town festival, I was immediately singled out by a rent-a-cop. He began questioning if I had been drinking, saying he smelt it on my breath. He smelt his own breath. FML

by porkabye / 08/02/2014 at 7:44pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I managed to not laugh as a potential high-profile Italian client with a heavy accent repeatedly pronounced "sheet metal" as "shit metal". Unfortunately, my boss and a senior colleague couldn't contain their own laughter. We lost that deal, and our jobs are now endangered. FML

by Shitmetalseller / 08/02/2014 at 6:37pm / United Kingdom (Cheshire) / Work

Today, I asked my boyfriend if he wanted me to get him some take out. He responded with, "I think we should see other people. Uh, chicken please." FML

by bertiebeth / 08/02/2014 at 1:35am / Australia (New South Wales) / Love

Today, my girlfriend interrupted my proposal to take a selfie with the ice cream I had just bought her. She then said no. FML

by Anonymous / 08/02/2014 at 12:00am / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, I was watching my 3 year old brother. He asked me to get him a cookie and I said, "What's the magic word?" He looked at me angrily and said "Bitch, please." FML

by WickedRene / 08/01/2014 at 9:57pm / United States (New York) / Kids

Today, my dad was doing FaceTime with a friend. He turned his iPhone towards my sister and said "There's my daughter..." He then turned it to me and said "...and there's my ugly son", then walked away. I'm still not sure if it's a joke or not. FML

by Anonymous / 08/01/2014 at 8:20pm / Canada (Quebec) / Geek

Today, I won a big raffle. However, my name is so ridiculous-sounding that they thought someone was playing a prank, and pulled a different ticket. I was too embarrassed to say anything. FML

by infortunatename / 08/01/2014 at 7:10pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got suspended from work after getting caught reading a work-related FML. Irony is funny, but it doesn't pay the bills. FML

by Anonymous / 08/01/2014 at 6:38pm / United Kingdom / Work

Today, my girlfriend's dad returned home from deployment. Being the grade A fucktard that I am, I got flustered and asked, "So um, did you make it back?" He looked me dead in the eyes and said completely deadpan, "No, obviously I died. Moron." FML

by whoops / 08/01/2014 at 4:45pm / United States (Indiana) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that my wife of 12 years has slept with the workmen we've had working on our long term building project. They call her the "quickie queen". FML

by Anonymous / 08/01/2014 at 2:27pm / United Kingdom (Glasgow City) / Intimacy

Today, I had to explain to my father why it isn't a good idea to shove a metal knife into the toaster when trying to get at a small piece of toast. This man is 45-years-old and has a PhD. FML

Today, I spent my afternoon rummaging through old jeans and other pants, due to being broke and needing cash for ramen. FML

by baconistasty27 / 08/01/2014 at 1:33am / United States (California) / Money

Today, I got sent to the head teacher's office for doing "stupid hand gestures and disrupting the class". Yesterday my teacher told the class to do the same hand gesture to ask for permission to go to the toilet so it wouldn't interrupt her talking. FML

by Bad Teacher / 08/01/2014 at 1:24am / Australia (Queensland) / Work

Today, my fiancé said "Rachel" instead of my name when asked to repeat, "I take thee, Emily, to be my lawfully wedded wife." I was shocked, so he explained while laughing that he doesn't even know a Rachel. He ruined our wedding for a Friends quote. FML

by Emliy / 08/01/2014 at 1:06am / United States (Illinois) / Love

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