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SHAMUS_the_WITTY

Offline (the 04/24/2015 at 6:56pm) | Search for a member

SHAMUS_the_WITTY

5Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Arc, France
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Thursday 2 August 1990 (24 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 14245
  • Number of comments : 409
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 10 posted

About SHAMUS_the_WITTY :
Shamus is the nickname I've had from my friends since I was 14 years old. I grew up in southern Alabama, and am attending college at LSU. IMHO, New Orleans is amazing

SHAMUS_the_WITTY's page activity

Visits<b>BMF96</b> - the 04/03/2015 at 12:08pm<b>zoratheexplora</b> - the 04/03/2015 at 1:13am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/02/2015 at 9:28am<b>EmmaRey</b> - the 04/02/2015 at 7:17am<b>abNormal62</b> - the 04/02/2015 at 7:03am<b>AZ09_AZ09</b> - the 04/02/2015 at 3:59am<b>Leafa</b> - the 04/02/2015 at 3:47am<b>sarahyep</b> - the 04/02/2015 at 2:32am<b>dakatabg</b> - the 03/18/2015 at 1:51am<b>tchatfield9413</b> - the 03/14/2015 at 3:46pm<b>leahb99</b> - the 03/07/2015 at 10:26pm<b>Mukuro</b> - the 03/04/2015 at 6:10pm<b>ThongWarrior</b> - the 02/28/2015 at 4:18am<b>karwank</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 6:04am<b>SwagBasket</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 1:45am<b>Jaredphamtom</b> - the 02/22/2015 at 2:22am<b>Iwtumn</b> - the 02/18/2015 at 10:20am<b>awesomepantTamia</b> - the 02/04/2015 at 9:07pm

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/02/2015 at 3:28pm<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 02/01/2015 at 7:32am<b>WoldowJR</b> - the 11/20/2014 at 6:59pm<b>emmaaadotcom</b> - the 11/01/2014 at 11:06pm<b>mintyowlgirl</b> - the 10/18/2014 at 1:29am

SHAMUS_the_WITTY's FML badges

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The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

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SHAMUS_the_WITTY's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to go see my granddad in the hospital and asked if he needed anything. He replied, "I need you to get out and send that hot nurse in, I may be old but I still got it." FML

#20644913
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47058) - you deserved it (6261)

On 05/06/2013 at 4:35am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I woke up to the sound of my newborn screaming. I frantically hopped out of bed and stumbled into the nursery where I was met by the priceless sight of my five-year-old daughter attempting to breastfeed her understandably frustrated little brother. FML

#20644821
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64862) - you deserved it (5968)

On 05/06/2013 at 2:29am - kids - by SkeetinKeaton (man) - United States

Today, I ran into my ex-girlfriend. Being the mature one, I went up to her and said, "Hey, how's it going?" She maced me and kept walking. FML

#20644793
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47812) - you deserved it (10524)

On 05/06/2013 at 2:06am - misc - by wat_dafuq_bro (man) -

Today, I was out with my grandma when a pair of very shady guys approached us in the street, hands in their pockets. Without breaking stride, she pulled a knife out of her handbag and told them they'd better keep walking. They did. What the fuck, gran? FML

#20640901
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50314) - you deserved it (7094)

On 05/04/2013 at 1:05pm - misc - by emasculated 10000% (man) - Sweden (Kronobergs Lan)

Today, walking by myself, I was caught up in a group of people that got arrested, and we all got fined for creating a public disturbance. When I explained I wasn't with them, the group backed me up. The police thought I was the ringleader, and now I have to go to court. FML

#20639737
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59237) - you deserved it (3407)

On 05/03/2013 at 9:14pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Netherlands

Today, my wife shaved her pubic hair so that it resembles Hitler's mustache. She won't stop referring to it as "the Clitler". FML

#20637691
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60630) - you deserved it (9161)

On 05/02/2013 at 8:50pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my girlfriend dumped me for cheating on her. Her "proof" was an image of me making out with a girl. Pretty damning, except she loaded it up in Photoshop, where I saw the image layers she'd used to fake the whole thing. I'm not sure what the hell she was thinking either. FML

#20637622
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53832) - you deserved it (3527)

On 05/02/2013 at 8:16pm - love - by psycho ex (man) - Brazil

Today, for a laugh, I put vanilla yogurt into a mayonnaise jar and went to the mall to eat it with a spoon. Too bad that someone called mall security on me for disturbing the peace. They shoved me into a back room and grilled me about what was in the jar. FML

#20632537
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42624) - you deserved it (18641)

On 04/30/2013 at 11:09am - misc - by longsock123 - United States (California)

Today, my fiancée broke off our engagement. For some bizarre reason, she'd hidden a pair of expensive boots and her iPad underneath our ride-on mower. I turned the mower on and destroyed both without realizing it. According to her, the fault is all mine. FML

#20630400
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51924) - you deserved it (3545)

On 04/29/2013 at 2:07pm - love - by Wow. Really? - United States (Ohio)

Today, a family of geese nested outside my halls of residence. They have started attacking everyone who tries to get in or out of the building. I'm basically being placed under house arrest by birds. FML

#20630234
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43432) - you deserved it (3705)

On 04/29/2013 at 12:14pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (York)

Today, things got pretty steamy between my boyfriend and me. We started doing stuff that neither of us had tried before. Then, he straddled me with a raging erection and boomed, "IT HAS RISEN!" He didn't understand why I was suddenly no longer in the mood. FML

#20623610
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46966) - you deserved it (9331)

On 04/26/2013 at 6:22pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I found out that I am allergic to one of the preservatives that they put in aloe. I found this out after I put some on a severe sunburn I have. Not only am I sunburned, but now I am severely itchy as well. FML

#20613229
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45550) - you deserved it (3890)

On 04/22/2013 at 2:42pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my mum asked me, "Shouldn't you be cleaning your room?" On impulse, I replied, "Shouldn't you be in the kitchen?" I've never been hit so hard in my life. FML

#20612550
270 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32835) - you deserved it (112813)

On 04/22/2013 at 3:19am - misc - by Anon - Singapore

Today, my girlfriend from high school contacted me, telling me we should hang out some time; I casually agreed. Two hours later she's on my doorstep in tears, wanting me to take her back. She's married with kids. I live four states away and haven't a clue how she found out where I live. FML

#20611227
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55535) - you deserved it (3705)

On 04/21/2013 at 7:26pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States



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