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SHAMUS_the_WITTY

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SHAMUS_the_WITTY

8Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Arc, France
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Thursday 2 August 1990 (25 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 18520
  • Number of comments : 412
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 10 posted

About SHAMUS_the_WITTY :
Shamus is the nickname I've had from my friends since I was 14 years old. I grew up in southern Alabama, and am attending college at LSU. IMHO, New Orleans is amazing

SHAMUS_the_WITTY's page activity

Visits<b>Spartancjm</b> - the 01/20/2016 at 6:18pm<b>Red_Curls1995</b> - the 01/18/2016 at 6:06pm<b>ciaraash</b> - the 01/10/2016 at 6:32pm<b>THE_GLOW_CLOUD</b> - the 01/10/2016 at 12:23pm<b>UberMom</b> - the 01/10/2016 at 1:46am<b>AirplaneFan03</b> - the 01/09/2016 at 2:14pm<b>spicyburrito</b> - the 01/09/2016 at 12:47pm<b>Sunkkissed</b> - the 01/09/2016 at 8:57am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 01/09/2016 at 8:38am<b>LyonDetreny</b> - the 01/09/2016 at 4:25am<b>Katdurin</b> - the 01/09/2016 at 3:36am<b>UncleCactus</b> - the 01/09/2016 at 3:26am<b>minxxx</b> - the 01/08/2016 at 10:36pm<b>tgodluke</b> - the 11/04/2015 at 8:30pm<b>Mewling_Quim</b> - the 10/23/2015 at 2:47am<b>Cookie_Overlord</b> - the 10/20/2015 at 8:15pm<b>xninix</b> - the 10/11/2015 at 11:06pm<b>CandienInEurope</b> - the 09/01/2015 at 9:07pm

Fucked!<b>dying_to_know</b> - the 08/30/2015 at 9:23am<b>Hop6e</b> - the 08/30/2015 at 7:00am<b>ScratchCatPower</b> - the 05/29/2015 at 12:34pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/02/2015 at 3:28pm<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 02/01/2015 at 7:32am<b>WoldowJR</b> - the 11/20/2014 at 6:59pm<b>emmaaadotcom</b> - the 11/01/2014 at 11:06pm<b>mintyowlgirl</b> - the 10/18/2014 at 1:29am

SHAMUS_the_WITTY's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

See all of SHAMUS_the_WITTY's badges

SHAMUS_the_WITTY's favorite FMLs

Today, I was bored at my job at Home Depot. I got a bar code tattoo 3 weeks ago and thought it would be funny to scan it. I'm a $5.98 160z claw hammer. FML

#881347
304 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42734) - you deserved it (139966)

On 04/09/2009 at 2:03am - work - by tool (man) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I got all my co-workers motivated. We were all going to quit and walk out the door. I went first. I gave an emotional speech to my boss and threw my uniform to the ground. Then I turned around to to see the rest follow, they all began laughing. They didn't. They WANTED me to quit. FML

#877150
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53124) - you deserved it (34921)

On 04/08/2009 at 8:34pm - work - by ineedanewjob (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I was at work laminating a large photo. While I was doing this, I had a sudden itch on my nut sack. So I quickly scratched it away. When the customer came to pick up the print, I noticed that one of my pubic hairs had laminated itself on the cheek of the woman in the photograph. FML

#869023
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17962) - you deserved it (96309)

On 04/08/2009 at 10:48am - work - by StevieMe (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was at the mall shoplifting when a girl who looked my age pointed to a shirt I had in my bag. "Stole that, huh?" she asked smiling. She looked pretty cool, so I nodded and asked if she stole the jeans she was wearing, which were from the store. Turns out she didn't, she's the manager. FML

#843065
712 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39179) - you deserved it (521444)

On 04/06/2009 at 8:41pm - misc - by blovesg (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, on my flight to Vegas, I was wishing that a really cute guy would come sit in the seat next to mine. A few minutes later, a really cute guy sat in the seat next to me and even started to talk to me. When I said, "I like rugged men." he said "Oh ya, me too! I really like buff guys also." FML

#831202
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68607) - you deserved it (13011)

On 04/06/2009 at 3:40am - love - by vela9002 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, for about the fifth time, my neighbors parked blocking my driveway. After parking across the street I stuck a note on their windshield reading “Nice park job asshole“, only to find out that their nephew just passed away and everyone was gathering to go to the viewing. FML

#765740
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27384) - you deserved it (52224)

On 04/02/2009 at 12:41pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, for April fools I decided to set off the smoke detectors in my friend's apartment while he was sleeping and saran wrap the outside of his bedroom doorway so he would smack into it. Instead, he jumped out the window and broke his leg. FML

#748414
237 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20876) - you deserved it (117531)

On 04/01/2009 at 4:06pm - health - by nic (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was ringing an old man up in the local grocery store when I had realized all he was buying was 3 bottles of vodka and a box of condoms. While I was loading the bags into his cart he laid his hand on my shoulder and told me "I'd take you home with me but chances are I would be arrested". FML

#711978
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (108865) - you deserved it (5843)

On 03/30/2009 at 9:13pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Maine)

Today, a mother wrote me a $130 check for babysitting her four kids for a few hours. Trying to be gracious, I said, "Wow, thank you, this is very generous!" She thought for a minute, then said, "You're right." She took the check back, ripped it up, and wrote me a new one for $55. FML

#699603
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (79355) - you deserved it (29891)

On 03/30/2009 at 9:34am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)

Today, I decided to cheat on my math test by writing a couple of equations on my hand. Totally satisfied, I handed my test in feeling like I had aced it. As I was heading toward the door, I happily waved goodbye to my teacher. She saw everything. FML

#637114
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19898) - you deserved it (203315)

On 03/27/2009 at 12:39am - misc - by rutho (man) - United States (California)

Today, after finishing a huge French essay, I realized my printer wasn't working. So, I emailed it to a guy in my class to print and then give to me. When I get to French, he said he had already turned his in early and never got my email. It turned out he used mine. I got an F on the essay. FML

#635600
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66920) - you deserved it (17839)

On 03/26/2009 at 11:38pm - misc - by lauren555 - United States (Virginia)

Today, I had my girlfriend over and we we're watching a movie in my basement. I run upstairs and pop a bag of popcorn. Later I come downstairs to find my 10 year old brother sitting next to my girlfriend saying," My brother always says he wants to screw your brains out, whatever that means". FML

#620278
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28564) - you deserved it (72981)

On 03/26/2009 at 11:42am - kids - by CaoNiMa (man) - China (Beijing)

Today, my parents were out so I invited my girlfriend over. It was the afternoon, and things started to heat up. We were having sex, and I was about to finish. Then I looked through the window, to see a construction worker (who was fixing the house next to mine) giving me a thumbs up. He's her dad. FML

#527563
386 comments

I agree, your life sucks (190627) - you deserved it (33567)

On 03/22/2009 at 9:04am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Malta

Today, I awoke to the sound of my dad knocking on my dorm room door for a surprise visit. He's barely outside the door and I pull the door open and say hey, when my roommate strips naked pulls the door open, kisses me on the cheek, says in an uber-gay voice, "Thanks for last night", and leaves. FML

#527227
533 comments

I agree, your life sucks (267245) - you deserved it (35528)

On 03/22/2009 at 6:38am - intimacy - by konens_dick (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I came out to my mom. I had an epic speech planned, and when I tried to tell her, it all fell apart and I started crying and just said, "I'm gay." After a few seconds silence, my mom sighs and says, "Duh." FML

#506180
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63642) - you deserved it (17382)

On 03/21/2009 at 5:13am - misc - by teriyaki124 - United States (California)



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