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SHAMUS_the_WITTY

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SHAMUS_the_WITTY

5Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Arc, France
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Thursday 2 August 1990 (24 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 14139
  • Number of comments : 409
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 10 posted

About SHAMUS_the_WITTY :
Shamus is the nickname I've had from my friends since I was 14 years old. I grew up in southern Alabama, and am attending college at LSU. IMHO, New Orleans is amazing

SHAMUS_the_WITTY's page activity

Visits<b>BMF96</b> - the 04/03/2015 at 12:08pm<b>zoratheexplora</b> - the 04/03/2015 at 1:13am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/02/2015 at 9:28am<b>EmmaRey</b> - the 04/02/2015 at 7:17am<b>abNormal62</b> - the 04/02/2015 at 7:03am<b>AZ09_AZ09</b> - the 04/02/2015 at 3:59am<b>Leafa</b> - the 04/02/2015 at 3:47am<b>sarahyep</b> - the 04/02/2015 at 2:32am<b>dakatabg</b> - the 03/18/2015 at 1:51am<b>tchatfield9413</b> - the 03/14/2015 at 3:46pm<b>leahb99</b> - the 03/07/2015 at 10:26pm<b>Mukuro</b> - the 03/04/2015 at 6:10pm<b>ThongWarrior</b> - the 02/28/2015 at 4:18am<b>karwank</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 6:04am<b>SwagBasket</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 1:45am<b>Jaredphamtom</b> - the 02/22/2015 at 2:22am<b>Iwtumn</b> - the 02/18/2015 at 10:20am<b>awesomepantTamia</b> - the 02/04/2015 at 9:07pm

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/02/2015 at 3:28pm<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 02/01/2015 at 7:32am<b>WoldowJR</b> - the 11/20/2014 at 6:59pm<b>emmaaadotcom</b> - the 11/01/2014 at 11:06pm<b>mintyowlgirl</b> - the 10/18/2014 at 1:29am

SHAMUS_the_WITTY's FML badges

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The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

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SHAMUS_the_WITTY's favorite FMLs

Today, I decided to cheat on my math test by writing a couple of equations on my hand. Totally satisfied, I handed my test in feeling like I had aced it. As I was heading toward the door, I happily waved goodbye to my teacher. She saw everything. FML

#637114
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17350) - you deserved it (190790)

On 03/27/2009 at 12:39am - misc - by rutho (man) - United States (California)

Today, after finishing a huge French essay, I realized my printer wasn't working. So, I emailed it to a guy in my class to print and then give to me. When I get to French, he said he had already turned his in early and never got my email. It turned out he used mine. I got an F on the essay. FML

#635600
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64391) - you deserved it (17219)

On 03/26/2009 at 11:38pm - misc - by lauren555 - United States (Virginia)

Today, I had my girlfriend over and we we're watching a movie in my basement. I run upstairs and pop a bag of popcorn. Later I come downstairs to find my 10 year old brother sitting next to my girlfriend saying," My brother always says he wants to screw your brains out, whatever that means". FML

#620278
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26601) - you deserved it (69888)

On 03/26/2009 at 11:42am - kids - by CaoNiMa (man) - China (Beijing)

Today, my parents were out so I invited my girlfriend over. It was the afternoon, and things started to heat up. We were having sex, and I was about to finish. Then I looked through the window, to see a construction worker (who was fixing the house next to mine) giving me a thumbs up. He's her dad. FML

#527563
377 comments

I agree, your life sucks (182748) - you deserved it (32157)

On 03/22/2009 at 9:04am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Malta

Today, I awoke to the sound of my dad knocking on my dorm room door for a surprise visit. He's barely outside the door and I pull the door open and say hey, when my roommate strips naked pulls the door open, kisses me on the cheek, says in an uber-gay voice, "Thanks for last night", and leaves. FML

#527227
526 comments

I agree, your life sucks (248841) - you deserved it (32368)

On 03/22/2009 at 6:38am - intimacy - by konens_dick (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I came out to my mom. I had an epic speech planned, and when I tried to tell her, it all fell apart and I started crying and just said, "I'm gay." After a few seconds silence, my mom sighs and says, "Duh." FML

#506180
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59133) - you deserved it (16332)

On 03/21/2009 at 5:13am - misc - by teriyaki124 - United States (California)

Today, my parents saw my report card. Now, they refuse to buy me my the new computer I've always wanted because my grades had 'slipped'. I made honor roll for three terms, and was kept off for the fourth for a single bad grade. I failed gym. FML

#504973
307 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60630) - you deserved it (38702)

On 03/21/2009 at 2:22am - work - by MollyMo - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I went into my older brother's room to get a condom. This happened the other day too when my boyfriend forgot one. So I went in there today and there was a note that said "Little Sister, stop using my condoms. And your boyfriend sounds like a girl when he climaxes." FML

#497309
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29772) - you deserved it (111164)

On 03/20/2009 at 8:43pm - intimacy - by Stacy (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I saw a video in class about women aged 65+ and their sex lives. An elderly, blind woman was having sex at her senior's home. I don't know what's worse, watching an hour-long documentary on this, or the fact that these women are having way more sex than I am. FML

#459732
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (83594) - you deserved it (9588)

On 03/19/2009 at 1:46am - intimacy - by notenoughsex (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my parents, who are out of town but driving back tomorrow, called to see how I was doing. They asked if I'd thrown a party in their absence, and I said no. My dad replied, "Well I'm currently looking at pictures on Facebook of our kitchen with beer and a bong on the table." FML

#456719
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16155) - you deserved it (118423)

On 03/18/2009 at 11:47pm - misc - by its_all_legit - United States (Virginia)

Today, I met my boyfriend's parents for the first time. In his front room was a giant parrot. Hoping to impress them, I went over to the bird and began talking to it proving I wasn't scared. Out of nowhere, it's beak clenched onto my nose making it gush blood on the carpet. I was hospitalized. FML

#454917
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53705) - you deserved it (17506)

On 03/18/2009 at 10:57pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, I received an e-mail from the girls at work. It was an invite to lunch but it said, "Lunch today at Camber's, PLEASE don't tell Francoise, I don't think any of us can take any more of her!" I'm Francoise. FML

#436130
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (82363) - you deserved it (18417)

On 03/18/2009 at 9:02am - work - by Francoise3 (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I was on a webcam with my friend. We were joking around so I stood up and flashed her. Her grandma choose that second to walk past and look at the screen. Her grandma now thinks were lesbians and that I'm a whore. FML

#416306
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21469) - you deserved it (71761)

On 03/17/2009 at 4:51pm - misc - by webcammistake (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was out with my friend. My six year old daughter was also with us. While we were walking through the parking lot, my daughter asked me in a very loud voice "Mommy, does a blow job taste bad?" FML

#360907
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (73114) - you deserved it (16963)

On 03/15/2009 at 10:18pm - intimacy - by hala (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I went to a birthday party for my friend's daughter. I picked up a gift for the girl and another for her parents. I got the mother a cute little garden stone that read "What our children see in the world depends on what we show them." Later, I found out her daughter is blind. FML

#334841
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64673) - you deserved it (15815)

On 03/15/2009 at 1:39am - misc - by Noname (woman) - United States (Connecticut)



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