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Offline (the 10/20/2016 at 8:08pm)



  • Town/Country : Arc, France
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Thursday 2 August 1990 (26 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 24237
  • Number of comments : 413
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 10 posted

About SHAMUS_the_WITTY :
Shamus is the nickname I've had from my friends since I was 14 years old. I grew up in southern Alabama, and am attending college at LSU. IMHO, New Orleans is amazing

SHAMUS_the_WITTY's page activity

Visits<b>ItnHmn</b> - the 09/16/2016 at 3:46pm<b>SpartyOnWayne</b> - the 08/02/2016 at 12:13pm<b>Jkalia</b> - the 08/01/2016 at 12:14pm<b>AirMelon</b> - the 06/16/2016 at 11:45pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/17/2016 at 9:11am<b>ragnarok1540</b> - the 04/26/2016 at 6:56pm<b>random2212</b> - the 04/25/2016 at 10:38pm<b>courtly25</b> - the 04/14/2016 at 10:11pm<b>alecspangler</b> - the 04/04/2016 at 8:52pm<b>EwahWeeWah</b> - the 03/30/2016 at 9:18pm<b>DragonBorn69</b> - the 03/03/2016 at 1:16pm<b>Spartancjm</b> - the 01/20/2016 at 6:18pm<b>Red_Curls1995</b> - the 01/18/2016 at 6:06pm<b>ciaraash</b> - the 01/10/2016 at 6:32pm<b>THE_GLOW_CLOUD</b> - the 01/10/2016 at 12:23pm<b>UberMom</b> - the 01/10/2016 at 1:46am<b>AirplaneFan03</b> - the 01/09/2016 at 2:14pm<b>spicyburrito</b> - the 01/09/2016 at 12:47pm

Fucked!<b>dying_to_know</b> - the 08/30/2015 at 9:23am<b>Hop6e</b> - the 08/30/2015 at 7:00am<b>ScratchCatPower</b> - the 05/29/2015 at 12:34pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/02/2015 at 3:28pm<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 02/01/2015 at 7:32am<b>WoldowJR</b> - the 11/20/2014 at 6:59pm<b>emmaaadotcom</b> - the 11/01/2014 at 11:06pm<b>mintyowlgirl</b> - the 10/18/2014 at 1:29am

SHAMUS_the_WITTY's FML badges


You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of SHAMUS_the_WITTY's badges

SHAMUS_the_WITTY's favorite FMLs

Today, as I was getting out of my car, an old and obese lady walked up to me and called me an "inconsiderate heartless bitch" for using the last handicap parking spot. I guess she didn't see my wheelchair. FML

by regstl / 06/01/2013 at 2:21am / United States (Oregon) / Miscellaneous

Today, while feeding my neighbour's cats, I mistakenly switched up their foods. One has medicated food that causes drowsiness. The healthy cat got knocked out like a log. I panicked, laid him out by the bed, and spilled milk around his head to make it look "natural." I think I'm going to hell. FML

by fuckshitcockwaffle / 05/31/2013 at 10:59am / Australia (Victoria) / Animals

Today, I uttered the phrase "the pot calling the kettle black" in class. Moments later, I'd been called a "racist twerp" and kicked out of class by the same English teacher who once tried to have another kid suspended for using the word "titillate", because apparently it's "pornographic". FML

by Anonymous / 05/30/2013 at 11:20am / United Kingdom (Northamptonshire) / Love

Today, the doorbell rang. I saw my incredibly overbearing mum's car outside, so I stayed quiet and tried to sneak upstairs. As I crawled through the hallway, commando style, I realised the door blinds were still out for cleaning. If scowls could kill, I'd be roasting in Hell right now. FML

by Anonymous / 05/30/2013 at 8:40am / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was sending intimate pictures to my girlfriend and accidentally sent one to my best friend. He sent me one back. FML

by Abrams52 / 05/28/2013 at 1:44am / United States (Indiana) / Intimacy

Today, my grandma's chihuahua was run over while I was taking her for a walk. She later whispered to me, "It should have been you." FML

by Anonymous / 05/28/2013 at 1:05am / United States / Animals

Today, I was taking a bus ride home, listening to some music. The music stopped and I assumed my iPod's battery had run out. Turns out someone managed to steal it, leaving my earphones in. I didn't feel a thing. FML

by stupid / 05/27/2013 at 7:16am / Lithuania (Kauno Apskritis) / Transportation

Today, as I was lying on my bed with one of my arms hanging from the side, I felt something sniff my hand from underneath. I don't have any pets. FML

by scared-straight / 05/27/2013 at 12:05am / United States / Animals

Today, I got dragged along to a family dinner. Some idiot invited my douchebag vegan uncle, who spent half the night making condescending remarks and lecturing us on how disgusting it was to have steak on offer at the table. A fistfight eventually erupted, and the cops were called. FML

by Anonymous / 05/26/2013 at 12:56pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I got on the subway with a broken leg. A kind woman stood up and offered me her seat. Before I could sit down, a guy shoved past me and took it for himself. The woman and I pointed out my cast and crutches, and asked him to give up the seat. He responded by flipping us off. FML

by a hex upon your anus, sir / 05/25/2013 at 12:14pm / United Kingdom / Transportation

Today, my uncle drove to my house in his tractor, beer in one hand, and a radio strapped to the dash blasting country music at unimaginable volume. Neither of us live on a farm. Half the neighborhood stood angrily glaring at us until we went inside. FML

by unwilling redneck / 05/24/2013 at 6:48pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, the communications expert I'm forced to work with added the line "as they can catch bigger fishes" to a film script. She does not believe me when I tell her that the plural of fish is "fish." This idiot not only has the final word, she makes twice what I do. FML

by onefishtwofishes / 05/23/2013 at 4:15pm / United States (District of Columbia) / Work

Today, I got a call from work stating that my employment was being terminated. This was after being suspended while they investigated my sexual harassment claim. Their reason for firing me: misuse of company time. Yes, I suppose reporting being sexually harassed is a huge waste of time. FML

by Anonymous / 05/23/2013 at 3:24am / United States / Work

Today, my mom scolded me and threatened to ground me for coming home past midnight. Normally, it wouldn't be unreasonable, except for the fact that I'm 24 years old, and that my parents live with me, in my own house. FML

by mammasboy / 05/21/2013 at 2:30pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, my brother broke his mountain bike, so he stole mine, and managed to break it as well. Then he made some kind of franken-bike out of parts from both, and messed that one up too. FML

by jfc, how just how / 05/19/2013 at 3:56pm / United Kingdom (Milton Keynes) / Miscellaneous