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SHAMUS_the_WITTY

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SHAMUS_the_WITTY

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Thursday 2 August 1990 (24 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 7591
  • Number of comments : 379
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 10 posted

About SHAMUS_the_WITTY : http://www.facebook.com/ChurchOfTheCowOverlords

Like it up, page I run (I'm Overlord). Satirical comedy, we're building a fanbase.

Shamus is the nickname I've had from my friends since I was 14 years old. I grew up in southern Alabama, and am attending college at LSU. IMHO, New Orleans is amazing

SHAMUS_the_WITTY's page activity

Visits<b>Melonxo</b> - the 08/04/2014 at 11:13pm<b>llamasbederpin</b> - the 07/18/2014 at 6:02pm<b>spencr</b> - the 07/04/2014 at 10:45pm<b>leonlee2002</b> - the 06/27/2014 at 10:37pm<b>thefavoredbrony</b> - the 06/27/2014 at 4:02pm<b>pumpkinpii</b> - the 06/21/2014 at 3:07am<b>coolio4120</b> - the 05/17/2014 at 11:31am<b>zeriously95</b> - the 05/01/2014 at 5:05pm<b>hunteryager</b> - the 05/01/2014 at 1:14pm<b>aa1717</b> - the 05/01/2014 at 10:15am<b>callmefireman</b> - the 04/20/2014 at 1:28am<b>gshocker20</b> - the 04/15/2014 at 6:54pm<b>higgy6969</b> - the 04/14/2014 at 2:55am<b>cnparks1990</b> - the 04/13/2014 at 10:26pm<b>IgneelDragneel</b> - the 04/12/2014 at 3:31pm<b>coconutcocus</b> - the 04/08/2014 at 11:36pm<b>skyeyez9</b> - the 04/08/2014 at 10:50pm<b>xAttackAttackx</b> - the 04/08/2014 at 9:08pm

SHAMUS_the_WITTY's FML badges

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The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

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SHAMUS_the_WITTY's favorite FMLs

Today, while showing my art work at a festival, a very old cougar walked up to me and asked if I wanted to hook up later. After refusing more than one time, the woman walked away with my business card. I've been getting emails with naked pictures. FML

#6437512
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19928) - you deserved it (4866)

On 11/24/2009 at 4:42pm - intimacy - by deathbysnoosnoo - United States (California)

Today, I was outside, peeing on a cactus. Then all of a sudden my dog jumped on my back, knocking me into the cactus. FML

#6435507
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11862) - you deserved it (48234)

On 11/24/2009 at 12:11pm - animals - by yomamma787 - United States (New Mexico)

Today, I had to break up with my girlfriend on her request because she "didn't have the heart to do it." Within twenty minutes I'd received 4 calls from mutual friends, including my best friend, telling me what a jerk I am. And one from my mom. FML

#6433183
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25528) - you deserved it (4616)

On 11/24/2009 at 3:11am - love - by Face_loser (man) - United States (California)

Today, my four year old got mad that he couldn't find his favorite character on the Wii. So, he decided to smash the Wii remote into my $700 LCD TV, shattering the screen. That was the only TV in the house, and the $80 service plan I bought doesn't cover accidental damage. FML

#6370061
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26480) - you deserved it (7778)

On 11/19/2009 at 4:14pm - kids - by mizzy (woman) - United States

Today, a woman cursed me out, called me a perverted freak, and said I should be ashamed of myself because I had asked her "How much for one night?." She works in a toy shop, I was with my five year old daughter, and was pointing to the sign, "Rent A Helium Tank!" FML

#6354900
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39564) - you deserved it (2760)

On 11/18/2009 at 2:52pm - kids - by whatthewhat - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I had a pig kidney dissection in Biology. I see a 'sack' which appeared to contain a liquid. Being the curious type, I cut open the sack, spraying said liquid over me and my desk. My teacher, after giggling, informed me that the liquid was in fact urine. I was pissed on by a dead pig. FML

#6340257
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11394) - you deserved it (33752)

On 11/17/2009 at 11:12am - misc - by Araya (man) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I was the paramedic at the scene of a car accident. One lady was hurt, and we had trouble getting any information from her as she was sobbing. I radioed in the details and said "...a lady in her mid 30's, ETA 10 minutes." She stopped crying, slapped me, and said, "I'm 28." FML

#6338943
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35440) - you deserved it (3886)

On 11/17/2009 at 6:16am - work - by Paramedic (man) - United Kingdom (Rochdale)

Today, a neighbour called to say my water tank burst. A colleague followed me home to help, took off his shirt so it wouldn't get wet and climbed through my window to get to the roof. My boyfriend unexpectedly came home as we were emerging from the bedroom. My colleague was still buttoning his shirt up. FML

#6309981
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42612) - you deserved it (5452)

On 11/15/2009 at 3:42am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my Dad decided to take his medicine before eating. He passed out with his face in a plate of chocolate cake. He wasn't responsive so I called the paramedics. When he got to the hospital, the doctor asked him if he knew why he was there. He replied, "Because my stupid daughter over reacted." FML

#6298520
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31491) - you deserved it (3048)

On 11/14/2009 at 7:35am - misc - by Kassiopia (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I went to the pharmacy to purchase a brace for my sprained wrist. My wife and I had recently ran out of KY lotion, so I decided to pick up a bottle while I was there. It didn't occur to me that these two items could be perceived as being related until the cashier began to giggle. FML

#6285234
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24825) - you deserved it (5895)

On 11/13/2009 at 7:57am - misc - by joeheathen (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I went through with my elaborate plans to propose to my girlfriend with creativity. I took her skydiving and proposed in midair. She rejected. Why? She wanted a more "traditional" proposal. FML

#6283772
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31047) - you deserved it (6316)

On 11/13/2009 at 2:14am - love - by rejectedmidair (man) - United States (California)

Today, I suffered a mental breakdown. I told my roommates about it, and they decided to throw a very loud party while I was sobbing in my room, unable to sleep. My Xanax prescription ran out, I have no more sick days, and I have to wake up in two hours to work a ten hour day. FML

#6177742
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31595) - you deserved it (6814)

On 11/06/2009 at 1:05am - health - by sadparty (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, as I stepped into the shower, I slipped and fell over the edge of the tub, pulling the shower curtain down with me. I called my roommate to help me up as I put on a towel over me. But before she could help me up, she grabbed her phone to take a picture. The picture became a mass text. FML

#6150429
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27267) - you deserved it (3233)

On 11/04/2009 at 12:40pm - misc - by xo007 (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, the police came to my door and told me about a woman who called the cops on me because she said that I had been following her in my car. We were on the highway. FML

#6129254
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29253) - you deserved it (1599)

On 11/02/2009 at 11:33pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I went on a date, and within the first five minutes, he said, "Before we go any further and get anymore serious, you need to know a few things, I have kissed a guy drunk because it was a dare, and have a $400 silk rose Victoria's Secret blanket." FML

#6128327
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26676) - you deserved it (5152)

On 11/02/2009 at 10:41pm - misc - by Shawty (woman) - United States (Georgia)



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