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SHAMUS_the_WITTY

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SHAMUS_the_WITTY
  • Town/Country : South of the Mason-Dixon, USA
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Thursday 2 August 1990 (23 years)
  • Number of visits : 5305
  • Number of comments : 375
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 10 posted

About SHAMUS_the_WITTY : http://www.facebook.com/ChurchOfTheCowOverlords

Like it up, page I run (I'm Overlord). Satirical comedy, we're building a fanbase.

Shamus is the nickname I've had from my friends since I was 14 years old. I grew up in southern Alabama, and am attending college at LSU. IMHO, New Orleans is amazing

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You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

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SHAMUS_the_WITTY's favorite FMLs

Today, I came home after ten hours at work to find my unemployed wife and 4 kids sprawled out watching TV waiting for me to get home and cook for them. I had to wash all the dishes first because they didn't feel like getting up or helping. FML

#10499435
224 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32744) - you deserved it (6511)

On 05/13/2010 at 12:07am - work - by justkillm3 - United States (North Carolina)

Today, after church, my 5-year-old son asked me about God, so I answered his questions in full. We talked about God for over 2 hours. At the end of it all, he pondered for a moment, before saying to me "That's the stupidest thing I ever heard. You're dumb." FML

#9721953
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23540) - you deserved it (54071)

On 04/08/2010 at 12:27am - kids - by bleredoshia (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. I was making a list of things to do tomorrow while faking an orgasm when I realize my boyfriend had finished about two minutes ago. He's pissed. FML

#9519577
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10245) - you deserved it (58730)

On 03/31/2010 at 3:56am - intimacy - by darthmilfious - Sent from mobile version

Today, I bullied a kid at school, just so someone would talk to me. FML

#9154406
310 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14057) - you deserved it (68973)

On 03/17/2010 at 5:22am - kids - by Kid (man) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I put on some goggles on in the pool, only to go underwater and see an old man "discreetly" jerking it. FML

#9152447
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31760) - you deserved it (3790)

On 03/17/2010 at 2:12am - intimacy - by today -

Today, while attempting a DIY pest removal, one of our tenants lit a skunk on fire. FML

#8956566
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16247) - you deserved it (1712)

On 03/09/2010 at 9:07pm - misc - by Al (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I woke up with one of the worst migraines I've had in months. My mother (who thinks I'm a hypochondriac) began to scream at me about "making up an illness". When I asked for my meds, she called me an addict and dumped my $300 prescription down the sink. FML

#8899793
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26891) - you deserved it (2375)

On 03/07/2010 at 7:16pm - health - by space_cadet90818 (woman) - United States (Vermont)

Today, a soldier in my unit had unknowingly lost a GPS in the woods and my section was sent to go find it. After hours of wading through chest high swamps in 32 degree weather, the GPS was found, thanks to the soldier who lost it. It was in his vest. FML

#8852783
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24224) - you deserved it (1715)

On 03/05/2010 at 8:11pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, a soldier in my unit had unknowingly lost a GPS in the woods and my section was sent to go find it. After hours of wading through chest high swamps in 32 degree weather, the GPS was found, thanks to the soldier who lost it. It was in his vest. FML

#8852783
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24224) - you deserved it (1715)

On 03/05/2010 at 8:11pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I went to go see a specialist for my prostate and was told he would have to do an exam before I could leave. Having had this checked just the previous year, I was more than a little irritated. As I was bent over the table the Dr. said, "Now, just pretend I'm Angelina Jolie." FML

#8851700
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20547) - you deserved it (2191)

On 03/05/2010 at 7:40pm - health - by artsmart1 - United States

Today, while at my tutoring job, a middle school kid couldn't find a word in the online dictionary. I told him he could check a regular paperback dictionary. His response was, "That's what you did in your day. That's not what we do in our day." I'm only 19. FML

#8779479
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21957) - you deserved it (2584)

On 03/02/2010 at 7:00pm - kids - by csc4lyfe09 - United States (Kansas)

Today, I was making out like a sixteen year old at the high school prom with this guy I kinda liked. All of a sudden, he rolls away and tells me he's "finished." We both had our clothes on the entire time. He is 23, I'm 25. I didn't know that was possible. FML

#8769205
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16949) - you deserved it (3048)

On 03/02/2010 at 7:38am - intimacy - by virginmary - Reserved

Today, I'm a 25-year-old married woman and I'm currently living with my grandfather to take care of him. Today, he grounded me. FML

#8766084
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25934) - you deserved it (3421)

On 03/02/2010 at 1:46am - misc - by grounded. - United States (Delaware)

Today, I locked my keys in my car. I was late for work so I went to smash the side window with a big rock. The rock bounced off the window and into my face. FML

#8706906
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8405) - you deserved it (26760)

On 02/28/2010 at 12:36am - work - by chevysprint (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I went to throw out the garbage outside. I noticed at the bottom of my can was a lot of rice. I was angry at my brother for making a mess. As I went to clean it up, the rice moved. It wasn't rice, it was maggots. FML

#8634808
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18575) - you deserved it (3077)

On 02/25/2010 at 6:46am - misc - by SayWhat (woman) - United States (New York)



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