About SHAMUS_the_WITTY : http://www.facebook.com/ChurchOfTheCowOverlords
Like it up, page I run (I'm Overlord). Satirical comedy, we're building a fanbase.
Shamus is the nickname I've had from my friends since I was 14 years old. I grew up in southern Alabama, and am attending college at LSU. IMHO, New Orleans is amazing
Why am I up so early?
You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.
An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
100 kick ass comments
100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!
Today, it is my boyfriend's and my one year anniversary. I bought him a Playstation 2. As soon as I gave it to him, he went straight to set it up without giving me anything. I said "What about me?" He walked over to me, gave me a kiss and said "I love it when you buy me things for no reason." FML
I agree, your life sucks (38425) - you deserved it (4974)
On 09/18/2009 at 7:27pm - love - by luvizwar (woman) - Australia (Queensland)
Today, my (now former) best friend kicked me out of the band I started because I wasn't 'dedicated enough' after a 3 day 'holiday' to visit my dying uncle. He also during this 3 day 'holiday' convinced my girl friend to leave me and date him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (46104) - you deserved it (2167)
On 09/16/2009 at 4:25am - misc - by dj163 (man) - Australia (Western Australia)
Today, I am still coughing. I was diagnosed with whooping cough last week, which apparently cannot be treated. Basically, it appears I'm a 19th century English peasant. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29684) - you deserved it (3008)
On 09/16/2009 at 1:33am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)
Today, at my cashier job, I got written up for accepting obviously photocopied coupons. Last week, I got written up for "inadequate customer service" because I refused to accept the same bogus coupons from the same customer. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35995) - you deserved it (1381)
On 09/15/2009 at 7:39pm - work - by bonedregardless (man) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I was in the bathroom defecating when I felt something hanging there. I reached back with toilet paper and starting pulling it out inch by inch; 3 feet later I learned I had a tapeworm. Worst of all, no pharmacy has the med the doctor prescribed. I have to live with this thing until the med gets here. FML
I agree, your life sucks (52988) - you deserved it (2609)
On 09/15/2009 at 5:14pm - intimacy - by benander (man) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I had dinner with my family at a fancy restaurant. They kept commenting about how cold it was and asked the waitress to turn off the air conditioning. When I got home, I realized the embroidered daisies on my undershirt made it look like I have giant protruding nipples. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13836) - you deserved it (3618)
On 09/14/2009 at 12:19am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, I was helping my dad move into his new house. It's a 4-bedroom house and he has three kids so it's perfect. I was wandering around and noticed that the first bedroom is his, the second is my older brother's, the third is my younger sister's, and the fourth is an office. I have no room. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40782) - you deserved it (2041)
On 09/13/2009 at 5:23pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, my Marine friend got back from his tour of duty overseas. We went out for drinks to celebrate his return. His own form of celebration was to pick a fight with a returning Navy SEAL and his friends. We lost. Badly. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23356) - you deserved it (9883)
On 09/13/2009 at 2:17am - health - by beaten (man) - United States (Idaho)
Today, after picking up my 6 year old from school, he says, "Drew said his dad could beat you up." I told him that he needs to respect his own father more and stand up for me! I get home, look up his class roster and low and behold, Drew's dad beat me up in Jr. High. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23287) - you deserved it (14726)
On 09/11/2009 at 4:11pm - work - by jeph23 (man) - United States (Nebraska)
Today, I was driving in the left lane and was suddenly hit by a woman who was in the right lane. I ran off the road, taking out a fence and totaling my car. When the cops asked the woman what happened she responded, "My tom-tom told me to turn left." FML
I agree, your life sucks (42045) - you deserved it (1567)
On 09/10/2009 at 12:36pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Montana)
Today, I played a goth character in my friend's student film with goth clothes, lip ring, eyeliner, etc. We went into Starbucks at break and an elderly man came up to me and said "Your kind is the reason for all the bad stuff in this world" and then spat in my $5 drink. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35628) - you deserved it (3752)
On 09/09/2009 at 12:15am - misc - by comet5002 (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I took a look at my boyfriend's videocamera. On it were several videos of me on the toilet. My boyfriend has been hiding the videocamera in the bathroom airvent, and taping me taking dumps for the past three months. FML
I agree, your life sucks (61797) - you deserved it (3172)
On 09/07/2009 at 2:05am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)
Today, my husband asked me for permission to have an affair with his hot secretary. FML
I agree, your life sucks (61324) - you deserved it (4654)
On 09/06/2009 at 5:35pm - love - by mandinga (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I went on a busy train. I packed myself in close to a very good looking woman and, too scared to say anything, looked out the window. After feeling a hand on my ass, I assumed it was her. To not ruin the moment, I didn't look back. After a few stops, I looked back. It was an old man. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27939) - you deserved it (8281)
On 09/06/2009 at 5:09pm - misc - by M.L. (man) - United States (New York)
Today, I was fired from my job. I was a lifeguard and the other day a 30 year old man who only spoke spanish hit on me. I'm 16 and politely rejected him. He then went to the front desk and told them how I tried molesting him in the locker room. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37629) - you deserved it (1515)
On 09/06/2009 at 2:23pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)
Monday 20 May 2013
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