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SHAMUS_the_WITTY

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SHAMUS_the_WITTY
  • Town/Country : South of the Mason-Dixon, USA
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Thursday 2 August 1990 (23 years)
  • Number of visits : 5276
  • Number of comments : 375
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 10 posted

About SHAMUS_the_WITTY : http://www.facebook.com/ChurchOfTheCowOverlords

Like it up, page I run (I'm Overlord). Satirical comedy, we're building a fanbase.

Shamus is the nickname I've had from my friends since I was 14 years old. I grew up in southern Alabama, and am attending college at LSU. IMHO, New Orleans is amazing

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You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

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You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

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SHAMUS_the_WITTY's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend started his first day of work. After saying our goodbyes, I went into our bedroom to get changed, picked up one of my blouses and found a camera, still recording. I guess someone has major trust issues. FML

#13729555
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21382) - you deserved it (3224)

On 11/05/2010 at 7:36pm - love - by distressed (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my own boyfriend admitted that he can't name one single thing he likes about me without naming something "physical." FML

#13642376
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24175) - you deserved it (5678)

On 10/29/2010 at 9:23pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, it was my little girl's birthday and her grandparents came over to celebrate. One of the presents from her grandparents turned out to be a sweater. She then asked, "Mommy, may I please lie?" When I shook my head no, she exclaimed, "I hate this ugly sweater!" FML

#13612697
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9908) - you deserved it (28337)

On 10/27/2010 at 7:47am - kids - by Lisaaa - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I watched a grizzled, old gas station attendant with a stain on her blouse use my driver's license to pick something out of her teeth. FML

#13559030
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25370) - you deserved it (1813)

On 10/23/2010 at 4:17am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I got pulled over by a state trooper for speeding. When he saw I had something in my pocket, he began to ask if it was a weapon. After arguing for a few minutes I was put in handcuffs. I was too embarrassed to pull the tampon out my pocket. FML

#13537704
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7788) - you deserved it (38986)

On 10/21/2010 at 2:10pm - misc - by Victoria - United States (Georgia)

Today, I received two cards in the mail for my late husband for his birthday. He has been dead for four years now, and the cards were from our two children, who live several states away. This is the fourth time it's happened, and neither of them answer my calls. Ever. FML

#13514836
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34598) - you deserved it (2461)

On 10/19/2010 at 6:58pm - kids - by widow - United States (Illinois)

Today, my boyfriend and I went to see his 72-year-old mom who just had minor surgery on her abdomen. When we asked how she was healing, she lifted up her nightgown to show us a bruise near her belly button. She wasn't wearing any underwear. FML

#13507250
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28272) - you deserved it (3009)

On 10/19/2010 at 1:20am - health - by coeurdlucky - United States

Today, in my college class, our teacher asked us what we wanted to do when we get out of college. I guess being a U.S. Marine gets you a lecture for the whole class to hear that I'm a war hungry pig, and should get a real job that requires a brain. My job field is Aircraft repair. FML

#13506521
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26847) - you deserved it (3538)

On 10/19/2010 at 12:21am - misc - by S3R1AL K1LL3R X - United States

Today, while on my run, I was attacked by my neighbor's new dog. It apparently didn't like me running past their house and broke free from its chain. I now have stitches and was just told that I'm probably being taken to court for the emotional distress I caused her and the dog. FML

#13397431
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30392) - you deserved it (2186)

On 10/10/2010 at 8:57pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I asked my girlfriend's father if I could marry his daughter. He smiled, shook my hand, and said "No, now get out of my house." FML

#13353894
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36778) - you deserved it (4005)

On 10/07/2010 at 10:26am - love - by Vinny1017 - United States (New York)

Today, I was working on my family genealogy. I found out that my best friend's great-grandfather murdered my great-grandfather. FML

#13337964
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34909) - you deserved it (3289)

On 10/06/2010 at 12:32am - misc - by cantstoplaughing (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I visited my vacation cabin. I've been planning to sell it, and it was in perfect condition when I last visited about 6 months ago. I walked in the door to find the floor covered in muddy pawprints and bloody remainders of meals. It appears some bears moved in during my absence. FML

#13313277
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24137) - you deserved it (3021)

On 10/04/2010 at 2:46am - misc - by screwthewilderness (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, the girl who I was in love with for almost seven years listed me on facebook as her "Brother." FML

#13281816
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26664) - you deserved it (4395)

On 10/01/2010 at 10:11pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Israel (Tel Aviv)

Today, I had to sneeze really bad in a restaurant. To avoid sneezing on everybody's food, I turned my head to the side and sneezed, it just so happens a waitress was there serving a table. My nose went straight into her ass. FML

#13274666
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24319) - you deserved it (5057)

On 10/01/2010 at 9:06am - health - by Embarrassed - United States

Today, my dad borrowed my new iPad to amuse him while he was in the shower without my knowledge. The iPad is now completely ruined, and my dad is refusing to buy me a new one. He says, "How was I to know that it wasn't waterproof?" FML

#13158291
234 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37545) - you deserved it (3163)

On 09/22/2010 at 4:39pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Denmark (Hovedstaden)



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