About SHAMUS_the_WITTY : http://www.facebook.com/ChurchOfTheCowOverlords
Like it up, page I run (I'm Overlord). Satirical comedy, we're building a fanbase.
Shamus is the nickname I've had from my friends since I was 14 years old. I grew up in southern Alabama, and am attending college at LSU. IMHO, New Orleans is amazing
Why am I up so early?
You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.
An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
100 kick ass comments
100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!
Today, I put on some goggles on in the pool, only to go underwater and see an old man "discreetly" jerking it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27008) - you deserved it (2960)
On 03/17/2010 at 2:12am - intimacy - by today -
Today, I loaded up all of my belongings into my Dad's truck to head back to my home state. After two hours of playing Tetris with my furniture, I threw a tarp over everything and sealed it tight with straps. When I went to start the truck, I couldn't find my keys. There's a chance I just dropped them outside, but my best bet is that they're probably in some nook in the bed of the truck. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14466) - you deserved it (3103)
On 03/13/2010 at 2:26pm - misc - by AprilFlowers - United States (Minnesota)
Today, while attempting a DIY pest removal, one of our tenants lit a skunk on fire. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15703) - you deserved it (1678)
On 03/09/2010 at 9:07pm - misc - by Al (woman) - United States (Colorado)
Today, I woke up with one of the worst migraines I've had in months. My mother (who thinks I'm a hypochondriac) began to scream at me about "making up an illness". When I asked for my meds, she called me an addict and dumped my $300 prescription down the sink. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21672) - you deserved it (1808)
On 03/07/2010 at 7:16pm - health - by space_cadet90818 (woman) - United States (Vermont)
Today, a soldier in my unit had unknowingly lost a GPS in the woods and my section was sent to go find it. After hours of wading through chest high swamps in 32 degree weather, the GPS was found, thanks to the soldier who lost it. It was in his vest. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20353) - you deserved it (1321)
On 03/05/2010 at 8:11pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)
Today, a soldier in my unit had unknowingly lost a GPS in the woods and my section was sent to go find it. After hours of wading through chest high swamps in 32 degree weather, the GPS was found, thanks to the soldier who lost it. It was in his vest. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20353) - you deserved it (1321)
On 03/05/2010 at 8:11pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)
Today, I went to go see a specialist for my prostate and was told he would have to do an exam before I could leave. Having had this checked just the previous year, I was more than a little irritated. As I was bent over the table the Dr. said, "Now, just pretend I'm Angelina Jolie." FML
I agree, your life sucks (17742) - you deserved it (1760)
On 03/05/2010 at 7:40pm - health - by artsmart1 - United States
Today, while at my tutoring job, a middle school kid couldn't find a word in the online dictionary. I told him he could check a regular paperback dictionary. His response was, "That's what you did in your day. That's not what we do in our day." I'm only 19. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18339) - you deserved it (2074)
On 03/02/2010 at 7:00pm - kids - by csc4lyfe09 - United States (Kansas)
Today, I was making out like a sixteen year old at the high school prom with this guy I kinda liked. All of a sudden, he rolls away and tells me he's "finished." We both had our clothes on the entire time. He is 23, I'm 25. I didn't know that was possible. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13202) - you deserved it (2320)
On 03/02/2010 at 7:38am - intimacy - by virginmary - Reserved
Today, I'm a 25-year-old married woman and I'm currently living with my grandfather to take care of him. Today, he grounded me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21697) - you deserved it (2706)
On 03/02/2010 at 1:46am - misc - by grounded. - United States (Delaware)
Today, I locked my keys in my car. I was late for work so I went to smash the side window with a big rock. The rock bounced off the window and into my face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6983) - you deserved it (20284)
On 02/28/2010 at 12:36am - work - by chevysprint (man) - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I went to throw out the garbage outside. I noticed at the bottom of my can was a lot of rice. I was angry at my brother for making a mess. As I went to clean it up, the rice moved. It wasn't rice, it was maggots. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18050) - you deserved it (3017)
On 02/25/2010 at 6:46am - misc - by SayWhat (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I had my final economics exam, and needed to ace it, or else I would fail the entire module. After studying all day yesterday, and pulling an all-nighter today, I managed to pull it off and get a perfect score. Unfortunately, my teacher didn't believe that it was possible, and accused me of cheating. Now I may be thrown out of college. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30560) - you deserved it (1907)
On 02/24/2010 at 4:28pm - misc - by koolkidx3 - United States (Virginia)
Today, my girlfriend of 3 years left me for a guy whose favorite color is camouflage. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28080) - you deserved it (3425)
On 02/24/2010 at 10:29am - love - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I had to file for bankruptcy because my ex-wife didn't want to pay for the house she didn't want me to have in the divorce, and didn't bother to have my name removed from the loan before she filed bankruptcy herself. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17620) - you deserved it (2300)
On 02/23/2010 at 11:22pm - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Kentucky)
Friday 24 May 2013
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