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SHAMUS_the_WITTY

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SHAMUS_the_WITTY

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Thursday 2 August 1990 (24 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 8091
  • Number of comments : 383
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 10 posted

About SHAMUS_the_WITTY : http://www.facebook.com/ChurchOfTheCowOverlords

Like it up, page I run (I'm Overlord). Satirical comedy, we're building a fanbase.

Shamus is the nickname I've had from my friends since I was 14 years old. I grew up in southern Alabama, and am attending college at LSU. IMHO, New Orleans is amazing

SHAMUS_the_WITTY's page activity

Visits<b>YouMadBra</b> - 16 hours ago<b>pilusepi</b> - 18 hours ago<b>Im_a_GOAT</b> - 20 hours ago<b>toomanyidiots</b> - the 09/16/2014 at 2:13am<b>metalscales</b> - the 09/15/2014 at 10:51pm<b>SampleSext</b> - the 09/15/2014 at 9:20pm<b>yoursmileishawt</b> - the 09/08/2014 at 12:18am<b>Melonxo</b> - the 08/04/2014 at 11:13pm<b>llamasbederpin</b> - the 07/18/2014 at 6:02pm<b>spencr</b> - the 07/04/2014 at 10:45pm<b>leonlee2002</b> - the 06/27/2014 at 10:37pm<b>thefavoredbrony</b> - the 06/27/2014 at 4:02pm<b>pumpkinpii</b> - the 06/21/2014 at 3:07am<b>coolio4120</b> - the 05/17/2014 at 11:31am<b>zeriously95</b> - the 05/01/2014 at 5:05pm<b>hunteryager</b> - the 05/01/2014 at 1:14pm<b>aa1717</b> - the 05/01/2014 at 10:15am<b>callmefireman</b> - the 04/20/2014 at 1:28am

SHAMUS_the_WITTY's FML badges

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You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

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SHAMUS_the_WITTY's favorite FMLs

Today, I bought weed for the first time. The dealer was an undercover cop. FML

Today, after holding it in for hours, I finally managed to run to the bathroom for a pee. I thought it was impossible for rats to climb up the sewer pipes and into the toilet, but apparently I was wrong. FML

#18192690
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31468) - you deserved it (2330)

On 11/08/2011 at 12:20pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, my recently ex-girlfriend's mother called me regarding her baby girl, saying, "If you mess with the chicklet, you mess with the momma hen." I have no idea what the hell this means for my future, but I'm a bit scared. FML

#18181651
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29186) - you deserved it (4859)

On 11/07/2011 at 2:20am - love - by roadkill0321 - United States

Today, I scored the winning goal in my soccer tournament. For the other team. FML

Today, I watched Change-Up with my dad. He made us leave half-way through the movie, because he thought I was too young to watch a movie this explicit. I'm 25. FML

Today, I was dared to walk home through a rough part of town. My rep hung in the balance, so I accepted. A kid kicked a football in my direction, so I kicked it back at him hard. It hit him in the nuts, and the next thing I know, I'm running for my life from three bald, shirtless, six-packed thugs. FML

#18159887
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13054) - you deserved it (32457)

On 11/04/2011 at 9:21pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was pulled over for going the wrong way on a closed highway. The construction signs pointed me in that direction, and the cop agreed that they should be fixed. Did it stop him from giving me a ticket anyway? Nope. FML

#18096005
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31114) - you deserved it (2351)

On 10/28/2011 at 11:59am - misc - by ashleyyyy - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was pulled over for going the wrong way on a closed highway. The construction signs pointed me in that direction, and the cop agreed that they should be fixed. Did it stop him from giving me a ticket anyway? Nope. FML

#18096005
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31114) - you deserved it (2351)

On 10/28/2011 at 11:59am - misc - by ashleyyyy - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was bitched out by my 17 year old son's teacher. It seems the idiot teacher made the kids advocate for his own political beliefs in a presentation, and my son ended his speech saying, "And it remains my opinion that our instructor is cramping my motherfucking style." Instant suspension. FML

#18095977
241 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26461) - you deserved it (4899)

On 10/28/2011 at 11:52am - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was bitched out by my 17 year old son's teacher. It seems the idiot teacher made the kids advocate for his own political beliefs in a presentation, and my son ended his speech saying, "And it remains my opinion that our instructor is cramping my motherfucking style." Instant suspension. FML

#18095977
241 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26461) - you deserved it (4899)

On 10/28/2011 at 11:52am - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was rear-ended by a girl barely out of her teens. I got out of my car and went to get her insurance details, only for her mother to get out and up in my face, screaming at me to, "Get back in your fucking car and get the fuck out of here!" I panicked and did just that. FML

#18091969
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13357) - you deserved it (33233)

On 10/27/2011 at 9:22pm - misc - by Benjamin - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, as I was driving to work, I witnessed a kid apparently getting jumped. Being a good citizen, I got out and started yelling at them. I ended up alongside the kid in the hospital. FML

#18078650
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34157) - you deserved it (3983)

On 10/26/2011 at 3:41am - health - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I went to the hospital with severe chest pain, thinking it was a heart attack. Turns out now I just can't have booze, pop, chocolate, fruit with skins, seeds, tomatoes, or mint. I'd rather have the heart attack. FML

#18058320
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26472) - you deserved it (3516)

On 10/23/2011 at 9:37pm - health - by heartsick (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I dislocated my jaw while giving my boyfriend a blowjob. FML

#18051286
361 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41421) - you deserved it (19124)

On 10/23/2011 at 1:45am - intimacy - by canucks_chick - Canada

Today, I was sitting in my room while my mom was talking to my uncle. I had my door open. She said "Yeah my son doesn't know I have his phone password. Girls nowadays are real sluts." FML

#18051184
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27060) - you deserved it (7956)

On 10/23/2011 at 1:30am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)



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