About SHAMUS_the_WITTY : http://www.facebook.com/ChurchOfTheCowOverlords
Like it up, page I run (I'm Overlord). Satirical comedy, we're building a fanbase.
Shamus is the nickname I've had from my friends since I was 14 years old. I grew up in southern Alabama, and am attending college at LSU. IMHO, New Orleans is amazing
Why am I up so early?
You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.
An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
100 kick ass comments
100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!
Today, I got a call from the police dept. My ex-boyfriend is applying for a job there, and they called me to ask if he was "a good candidate for a police officer." I had to start my day off by saying great, nice things about the guy who broke my heart and completely disrespected me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20584) - you deserved it (13978)
On 02/23/2011 at 9:26am - love - by karmaplz (woman) - United States (Connecticut)
Today, I woke up next to my best friend after lots of drinking and the best sex I've ever had in my life. The only problem is we're both straight males. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42543) - you deserved it (33104)
On 02/19/2011 at 4:29pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)
Today, I was forced to attend a fire safety class, as required by my job. Last year, I completed the fire academy as a volunteer fireman. The class was not only insulting, but wrong in many ways. I got kicked out for pointing them out. I now have to take it again, or be fired. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19602) - you deserved it (4172)
On 02/17/2011 at 8:47pm - work - by peeved (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I was forced to attend a fire safety class, as required by my job. Last year, I completed the fire academy as a volunteer fireman. The class was not only insulting, but wrong in many ways. I got kicked out for pointing them out. I now have to take it again, or be fired. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19602) - you deserved it (4172)
On 02/17/2011 at 8:47pm - work - by peeved (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I woke up to a bloody nose. Instead of rushing to the bathroom, I creatively dripped the blood over a knife for photography class because the assignment was to show emotion. So many of the students and faculty were disturbed that I'm now forced to talk to the school psychologist. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19559) - you deserved it (27490)
On 02/16/2011 at 7:56am - misc - by rhartnett11 -
Today, I received my first wedding present in the mail. I opened it immediately and called the sender to say thanks. She yelled at me for opening it and, because she shipped it to me by mistake, requested it back. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19891) - you deserved it (2165)
On 02/13/2011 at 9:22pm - misc - by bride2be (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)
Today, I opened my car door on reaching destination and my dog escaped. I never found him. My destination was the vet's office to get him micro-chipped. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29026) - you deserved it (4268)
On 02/11/2011 at 4:02am - animals - by Jen -
Today, my sister lost a leg. Immediately after hearing the news, my boyfriend started cracking jokes about getting her a job at IHOP. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39750) - you deserved it (4563)
On 02/11/2011 at 1:13am - misc - by mariet (woman) - United States
Today, I finally got a reply to the letter to a celebrity that I had to write for my English class. It was a restraining order. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24455) - you deserved it (5584)
On 02/09/2011 at 10:53am - misc - by PrestonW -
Today, I was leaving school to get tested for peptic ulcers, because my stomach has been hurting for a few months. To wish me luck, one of my friends gave me a friendly punch in the stomach. I threw up blood. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37487) - you deserved it (2386)
On 02/08/2011 at 7:48am - health - by soccerscout7 -
Today, I bought a pretty blue parakeet to keep my parrot company, and named her Sky. I went to work a few hours later. When I came home that night, I found my parrot dead. There wasn't a huge mess to clean, though; Sky had already eaten half of his corpse. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24280) - you deserved it (5398)
On 02/04/2011 at 7:29pm - misc - by omnomnom (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, the midwest blizzard hit my town, burying the roads in snow. All the local stores are closed. I'm not only currently on my period, but I'm out of pads and toilet paper. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35793) - you deserved it (7797)
On 02/03/2011 at 3:59pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)
Today, I was rudely stopped in the park by a woman screaming at me for being a slut for having a baby so young. She got so worked up that she started swearing. Not only was I just babysitting for a friend, I am unable to get the toddler to stop swearing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35008) - you deserved it (2373)
On 01/30/2011 at 9:46am - kids - by QuicksilverMaximoff (woman) - United Kingdom (St. Helens)
Today, while at my boyfriends place, I thought I would be nice by folding his laundry and putting it away since he was working late. I opened his sock drawer and sitting on top was a photo of his mother, naked. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44581) - you deserved it (3308)
On 01/29/2011 at 1:55am - intimacy - by FamilySecret - United States
Today, I came home to find a note on my door. I thought it was from my elderly disabled neighbors thanking me for cleaning off their snow covered car, since about 6 inches came down. It was from them, only it said I owed them for damages to their car. Damages that were already there. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22622) - you deserved it (2398)
On 01/28/2011 at 12:24am - misc - by kittyd (woman) - United States (West Virginia)
Monday 20 May 2013
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