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SHAMUS_the_WITTY

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SHAMUS_the_WITTY

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Thursday 2 August 1990 (24 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 9522
  • Number of comments : 396
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 10 posted

About SHAMUS_the_WITTY : http://www.facebook.com/ChurchOfTheCowOverlords

Like it up, page I run (I'm Overlord). Satirical comedy, we're building a fanbase.

Shamus is the nickname I've had from my friends since I was 14 years old. I grew up in southern Alabama, and am attending college at LSU. IMHO, New Orleans is amazing

SHAMUS_the_WITTY's page activity

Visits<b>_liam_72_</b> - the 11/26/2014 at 7:55pm<b>WoldowJR</b> - the 11/20/2014 at 12:59pm<b>swampbaby985</b> - the 11/11/2014 at 8:42am<b>YourAuntsCousin</b> - the 11/08/2014 at 1:03am<b>Gwen4var</b> - the 11/07/2014 at 2:35pm<b>emmaaadotcom</b> - the 11/01/2014 at 6:06pm<b>tonimari3</b> - the 10/23/2014 at 11:50pm<b>Jonny_Blaze0017</b> - the 10/19/2014 at 2:59am<b>Purrrvana</b> - the 10/18/2014 at 2:39pm<b>mintyowlgirl</b> - the 10/17/2014 at 7:29pm<b>samm12099</b> - the 10/17/2014 at 5:36pm<b>turtlerae4</b> - the 10/16/2014 at 11:26pm<b>somebodywhocares</b> - the 10/16/2014 at 12:33am<b>vindown</b> - the 10/15/2014 at 9:02am<b>chipinn</b> - the 10/15/2014 at 1:47am<b>charethcutestory</b> - the 10/15/2014 at 12:36am<b>Ambrily</b> - the 10/14/2014 at 2:03pm<b>Bradley_Dillon</b> - the 10/14/2014 at 2:03pm

Liked!<b>WoldowJR</b> - the 11/20/2014 at 6:59pm<b>emmaaadotcom</b> - the 11/01/2014 at 11:06pm<b>mintyowlgirl</b> - the 10/18/2014 at 1:29am

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You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

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SHAMUS_the_WITTY's favorite FMLs

Today, I was taking a peaceful stroll in the local park when a curious turkey decided to follow me. Trying to shoo it away, I swung my leg at it, as if to fake kick it. Being the stupid animal it is, it decided to fly into my leg as I swung, causing my foot to connect to its neck. It died. FML

#20529231
229 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22251) - you deserved it (45499)

On 03/03/2013 at 9:40am - animals - by Anonymous - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my brother called me, asking if I could help him do his taxes. Since he's a high school and college dropout, I thought all I had to do was a 1040EZ. No, last year he made more than twice what I earn, through self-employment. I have two Master's degrees and work at Burger King. FML

#20527434
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33069) - you deserved it (8093)

On 03/01/2013 at 9:35pm - misc - by tax-man - United States (South Carolina)

Today, my boss gave me the task of firing a recently-hired coworker next Friday. This guy spends most of his off-hours working out, probably abusing the fuck out of steroids, and to whom prison is like a bed-and-breakfast. I fear for my life by this point. FML

#20526945
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27536) - you deserved it (2375)

On 03/01/2013 at 1:22pm - work - by cthulhu help me (man) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I went out to buy a bottle of wine and some condoms. As the cashier scanned the condoms, she snickered and muttered, "Yeah right." She was right; I really was just desperate to look like I have a sex life. I got so upset that I left my items and walked out with tears in my eyes. FML

#20526083
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36813) - you deserved it (10649)

On 02/28/2013 at 7:48pm - misc - by useless pos (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I had to sneak out of work early to pick my 14-year-old son up from school. He and a friend had been found covered in Astroglide, racing each other down the corridor on their bellies. My boss noticed my absence from work, and now my son and I are both on suspension. FML

#20526049
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27269) - you deserved it (8768)

On 02/28/2013 at 7:15pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I found that someone had paid off my $16,500 student loan. I was so excited that I called my family and posted on Facebook about how awesome it was. Then I called the loan company and found out that they had just sold my loan to another company; no one had actually paid it off. FML

#20525305
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25466) - you deserved it (12378)

On 02/28/2013 at 2:19am - money - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I found out that my mom has linked my iPhone with her iPad and has been secretly reading my texts. FML

#20524792
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35189) - you deserved it (3737)

On 02/27/2013 at 7:27pm - misc - by segal1010 - United States (Maryland)

Today, I finally made a Facebook account after being home-schooled my entire life. I friended people that I know and their friends, and subsequently sparked a debate on whether or not I exist. FML

#20523906
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27436) - you deserved it (3658)

On 02/27/2013 at 12:03am - misc - by thepokemonkid - United States (Connecticut)

Today, a German guy came into the place where I work. Eager to use the German that I'd learned from my immigrant mother and her family, I started a conversation. Things were going well until the term I grew up thinking meant "Africa" turned out to be racist, translating as "Ape Land." FML

#20523889
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27741) - you deserved it (3753)

On 02/26/2013 at 11:50pm - misc - by Jan (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, a German guy came into the place where I work. Eager to use the German that I'd learned from my immigrant mother and her family, I started a conversation. Things were going well until the term I grew up thinking meant "Africa" turned out to be racist, translating as "Ape Land." FML

#20523889
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27741) - you deserved it (3753)

On 02/26/2013 at 11:50pm - misc - by Jan (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, a guy I went on one date with asked me out again via text. Being honest, I texted back, politely saying that he was a good guy but I wasn't really interested. He came over to my house, screaming about how awful I was for "text message breaking up with him" and then cracked my windshield. FML

#20522936
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35834) - you deserved it (4215)

On 02/26/2013 at 11:43am - love - by fuckedover - United States

Today, I gave birth to my daughter in a hospital corridor. The nurse who took me to my room afterward tried to comfort me by saying there've been worse incidents; she said that two years ago, a lady gave birth in the parking lot. That was me too. FML

#20521872
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56161) - you deserved it (4520) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 02/25/2013 at 2:47pm - health - by laprochainefoisjerestealamaison (woman) - France (Languedoc-Roussillon)

Today, my boyfriend of three years told me he was thinking about us taking a break. After an hour of crying and him saying it would be okay, I accepted it. When I asked when the break would start, he replied, "What are you talking about? I only said I'd thought about it" and then laughed. FML

#20521204
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36494) - you deserved it (6676)

On 02/25/2013 at 1:10am - love - by Gullible (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, while driving extremely fast on a road in the middle of nowhere, I started to go down a hill. Noticing a police car at the bottom, I slammed my brakes and blew a tire in the process. It turns out the police car was an old cutout used to trick people. FML

#20520975
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10332) - you deserved it (51178)

On 02/24/2013 at 10:41pm - misc - by Fox - United States

Today, my son broke his hand when he and his best friend had the genius idea of punching each other in the fists as hard as they could. FML

#20520875
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27335) - you deserved it (3278)

On 02/24/2013 at 9:57pm - kids - by why the fuck would you do that - United States (Arizona)



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