About SHAMUS_the_WITTY : http://www.facebook.com/ChurchOfTheCowOverlords
Like it up, page I run (I'm Overlord). Satirical comedy, we're building a fanbase.
Shamus is the nickname I've had from my friends since I was 14 years old. I grew up in southern Alabama, and am attending college at LSU. IMHO, New Orleans is amazing
Why am I up so early?
You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.
An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
100 kick ass comments
100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!
Today, I got a call from work stating that my employment was being terminated. This was after being suspended while they investigated my sexual harassment claim. Their reason for firing me: misuse of company time. Yes, I suppose reporting being sexually harassed is a huge waste of time. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22171) - you deserved it (2103)
On 05/23/2013 at 3:24am - work - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my mom scolded me and threatened to ground me for coming home past midnight. Normally, it wouldn't be unreasonable, except for the fact that I'm 24 years old, and that my parents live with me, in my own house. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38458) - you deserved it (3635)
On 05/21/2013 at 2:30pm - misc - by mammasboy - United States (Illinois)
Today, my brother broke his mountain bike, so he stole mine, and managed to break it as well. Then he made some kind of franken-bike out of parts from both, and messed that one up too. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34474) - you deserved it (2794)
On 05/19/2013 at 3:56pm - misc - by jfc, how just how (man) - United Kingdom (Milton Keynes)
Today, I went to visit my sister, who lives four hours away from me. I'd only just sat down on their couch when her husband told me I needed to leave so they could have sex. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36962) - you deserved it (2566)
On 05/16/2013 at 12:16pm - misc - by earplugsplease (woman) - United States (Minnesota)
Today, my ex-boyfriend called my parents to let them know I broke up with him. He was sobbing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35031) - you deserved it (8161)
On 05/15/2013 at 11:16am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, I walked in on my son trying to carve a bong out of a watermelon. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35621) - you deserved it (6076)
On 05/11/2013 at 12:21pm - kids - by What the fuck, son? (man) - Netherlands (Utrecht)
Today, I had my college graduation ceremony. As I was walking across the stage, some asshat, in front of over 55,000 students and staff, brazenly ran across the stage, snatched my diploma up out of the president's hand, and ran off. FML
I agree, your life sucks (50121) - you deserved it (3141)
On 05/09/2013 at 6:11am - misc - by Uwrongfodat (man) - United States (Texas)
Today, I was laid off from my job as a manager. After cleaning out my office, I began clearing my computer. I received an email from HR announcing a job position that opened up. Too bad it was for my job. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37794) - you deserved it (2798)
On 05/09/2013 at 3:35am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)
Today, my family flew out to surprise my grandma for her 70th birthday. When we arrived, she and my grandpa were both sitting on the couch, high, smoking a joint. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44059) - you deserved it (9429)
On 05/08/2013 at 2:59am - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I tried lying to my parents for the first time. My mother is a neuroscientist and my father is a psychologist. Somehow, they managed to make me admit that I was lying before I'd even finished. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27189) - you deserved it (35176)
On 05/06/2013 at 8:52pm - misc - by blondie107 - United States (Texas)
Today, I went to go see my granddad in the hospital and asked if he needed anything. He replied, "I need you to get out and send that hot nurse in, I may be old but I still got it." FML
I agree, your life sucks (40910) - you deserved it (5332)
On 05/06/2013 at 4:35am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, I woke up to the sound of my newborn screaming. I frantically hopped out of bed and stumbled into the nursery where I was met by the priceless sight of my five-year-old daughter attempting to breastfeed her understandably frustrated little brother. FML
I agree, your life sucks (55643) - you deserved it (4769)
On 05/06/2013 at 2:29am - kids - by SkeetinKeaton (man) - United States
Today, I ran into my ex-girlfriend. Being the mature one, I went up to her and said, "Hey, how's it going?" She maced me and kept walking. FML
I agree, your life sucks (41136) - you deserved it (9169)
Today, I was out with my grandma when a pair of very shady guys approached us in the street, hands in their pockets. Without breaking stride, she pulled a knife out of her handbag and told them they'd better keep walking. They did. What the fuck, gran? FML
I agree, your life sucks (44131) - you deserved it (6071)
On 05/04/2013 at 1:05pm - misc - by emasculated 10000% (man) - Sweden (Kronobergs Lan)
Today, walking by myself, I was caught up in a group of people that got arrested, and we all got fined for creating a public disturbance. When I explained I wasn't with them, the group backed me up. The police thought I was the ringleader, and now I have to go to court. FML
I agree, your life sucks (52844) - you deserved it (2707)
On 05/03/2013 at 9:14pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Netherlands
Monday 20 May 2013
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