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SGTcrazyBoy2000

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SGTcrazyBoy2000

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  • Number of visits : 237
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

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SGTcrazyBoy2000's page activity

Visits<b>photographer49</b> - the 02/20/2015 at 12:48pm

SGTcrazyBoy2000's FML badges

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SGTcrazyBoy2000's favorite FMLs

Today, I was checking the family's computer history, and found that "Shrek Porn" had been searched multiple times. FML

#21365639
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11111) - you deserved it (1001)

On 03/01/2015 at 1:05am - misc - by mszoe - United States (California)

Today, I witnessed the beautiful sight of a tiny baby bird struggling to take flight from its nest. "You can do it," I muttered, which I guess my asswipe of a cat heard as "Quick, go kill that bird and scar me for life, please." FML

#21360123
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27389) - you deserved it (3715)

On 02/20/2015 at 11:25pm - animals - by tulisa (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I got to experience the horror of my wife's pregnancy. She woke me up abruptly at 5 am by throwing up all over me due to her terrible morning sickness, then ate pickles covered in mayonnaise, and later dropped to the floor sobbing when I told her we were out of dog food. FML

#21315694
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35454) - you deserved it (4284)

On 12/11/2014 at 4:47pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend visited my restaurant with some guy I'd never seen before. She introduced him to me as her "new boyfriend". She was always a cold bitch, but I never saw this coming. I had to serve their food while choking back tears, and I couldn't work up the nerve to spit in it. FML

#21260464
225 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51424) - you deserved it (4985)

On 09/18/2014 at 3:32am - love - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, one of my customer's pipes were blocked. As I went to unblock it, about a handful of used condoms collided with my face. I don't know if I should be disgusted by this or disgusted by my customer. FML

#21231545
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44629) - you deserved it (3859)

On 08/07/2014 at 5:09am - intimacy - by failallday (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, a bird got into the walls of my house through a hole. I located where it was by following the chirping and scratching sounds, and drilled a hole to get it out. I pulled out the drill, only to find the drill bit bloody. Suddenly, no more chirps. FML

#21131587
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50237) - you deserved it (16879)

On 05/05/2014 at 5:03pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Indiana)

Today, my overly-attached 14-year-old cat wanted attention while I was in a heated Skype argument with my girlfriend. Worked up from the fight, I raised my voice and said, "Not now, go away!" He ran to his little bed, had a heart attack and died. I was a complete dick to my cat in his last moments. FML

#21108570
359 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65407) - you deserved it (32760)

On 04/09/2014 at 2:40pm - animals - by Brody89 (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, my drunken self became a vaguely racist poet. I am now the author of a four-page poem entitled "Chocolate Men". FML

#21094789
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30347) - you deserved it (16219)

On 03/23/2014 at 11:40pm - misc - by chocochoco - United States (New York)

Today, my girlfriend and I were quite drunk while we were fooling around on the couch, when I decided I wanted to lose my virginity to her. I was two thrusts in when she burst out laughing. Looking down, I realized I was between her cheeks and the couch cushion. I lost my virginity to her couch. FML

#21053213
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52615) - you deserved it (18590)

On 02/07/2014 at 9:18am - intimacy - by Unknown - United States (Iowa)

Today, feeling too lazy to cook dinner, I bought a bagged salad from a low-end store. I dumped the contents into a bowl; the first thing that fell out was a dead mouse. Bon appetit. FML

#21011242
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42573) - you deserved it (6205)

On 12/31/2013 at 2:52am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Oregon)

Today, I had to pull one of those toy stretchy hands out of my dog's butthole. It slapped me in the face when I finally got it out. FML

#20787584
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57331) - you deserved it (6791)

On 07/17/2013 at 12:48am - animals - by anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, as a joke, my friends pushed me into the men's restroom and held the door shut. As I was trying to push the door open, I heard a voice behind me say, "Wow. Immaturity, huh?" I turned to find a guy taking a dump in one of the urinals. FML

#20757332
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54006) - you deserved it (3468)

On 07/01/2013 at 1:50am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, in public, a homeless guy looked me in the eyes and started wanking. FML

#20729997
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48625) - you deserved it (4486)

On 06/16/2013 at 7:27pm - intimacy - by scarredforlife - United States (New York)

Today, I found out my boyfriend has a chicken nugget fetish. He wants me to take a chicken nugget bath in a bikini. He seems to be dead serious. FML

#20549296
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44564) - you deserved it (4565)

On 03/18/2013 at 2:10pm - intimacy - by chickenmcnuggetgirl (woman) - Ireland (Meath)

Today, I was sitting on the chair-lift on a ski trip. There was a shift in gears and the metal in the seat began to vibrate. My dad, sister, and step-mom were all on the lift with me, not feeling a thing. It's terribly awkward to converse with your family while you involuntarily orgasm. FML

#20523671
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44799) - you deserved it (5622)

On 02/26/2013 at 10:00pm - intimacy - by Frostbitten (woman) - United States (Maine)



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