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About RuffianLivesOn : I love animals.
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Today, I accidentally adopted a dolphin for $125. FML
I agree, your life sucks (2762) - you deserved it (6291)
On 05/02/2012 at 10:39pm - money - by Optimus_Prime97 - United States
Today, while standing completely still at Walmart, I was hit by a drunk man on a Jazzy Scooter. He laughed, said it was an accident, gunned the scooter and took out two more people. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16835) - you deserved it (1554)
On 12/08/2011 at 9:48am - misc - by skidmark (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, some friends and I were pulled over on our way back from a party. We'd had a few drinks, so we tried to play it cool just in case we were over the limit. The cop didn't seem to want to breathalyze us, until my really high friend in the back seat said, "These are not the droids you are looking for." FML
I agree, your life sucks (9585) - you deserved it (28319)
On 12/07/2011 at 9:46am - misc - by Notadrinkanddriveidiot - United States
Today, I went to a concert. Being 6'5" was a great advantage because I could see the stage from wherever I was stood. On the downside, I was used by people as a meeting point. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20772) - you deserved it (2445)
On 12/06/2011 at 8:01pm - misc - by jackgrant (man) - Iran Islamic Republic of
Today, I got kicked in the crotch by a horse in my backyard. I don't own a horse. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10593) - you deserved it (963)
On 12/06/2011 at 11:54am - animals - by Rash (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, my girlfriend agreed to doing it doggy style. During it all, I pulled on her hair. I guess I pulled too hard, because when I let go, her face smacked straight into the bedside table. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9201) - you deserved it (27081)
On 11/11/2011 at 5:29pm - intimacy - by Henry - Norway (Hordaland)
Today, we were playing dodgeball at school. I tried to duck and jump around so the idiots on the other team couldn't nail me with the ball. Mid-jump, it tore through the air and smashed straight into my ballsack, sending me curling into a fetal position on the floor. I feel like I got sterilized. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15127) - you deserved it (6746)
On 10/28/2011 at 8:44pm - misc - by ricksterile - United States (Illinois)
Today, I came home from work to my 3 year old daughter sniffing the rug in the living room. When I asked her what she was doing she said "Daddy smell this." So I went, got on my knees and bent down to smell it and she pushed my face in the dog crap smeared in the rug. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23132) - you deserved it (4929)
On 10/22/2011 at 10:06pm - kids - by me - United States (Maine)
Today, my eleven year old sister came in, and bitched to me and my boyfriend about how she was going to tell my mom about the used condom she found. My boyfriend punched her in the face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40685) - you deserved it (11118)
On 10/19/2011 at 10:37am - intimacy - by lolilovemyboyfriend (woman) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, while working in a jail, I had to tell an inmate arrested for domestic violence that no, he could not use his phone call to call me at home. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15267) - you deserved it (1191)
On 10/02/2011 at 11:29pm - work - by Anonymous - United States
Today, after 4 months of no family contact while deployed in the military, I receive an email from my mother. Attached was a picture of a toilet full of green shit, with a message from my mom saying, "Seen neon poo before? Thought I would share!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (19169) - you deserved it (1268)
On 09/29/2011 at 8:27am - misc - by btchzloveit (man) - United States (Armed Forces Pacific)
Today, the boy I like came to my house with a dozen roses to ask me to homecoming. My uncle chased him down the street with a pitchfork. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29465) - you deserved it (1564)
On 09/28/2011 at 5:52pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I woke up next to my boss naked. We are both women and she is married. Work should be interesting tomorrow. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14561) - you deserved it (29844)
On 09/26/2011 at 2:20pm - intimacy - by BigBananaLover - United States (California)
Today, my boyfriend showed me a YouTube video of him popping a huge blackhead on his forehead. He told me he had been "growing" it for more than 2 years now. I have been caressing and kissing that thing for almost 2 years because I thought it was a beauty mark. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23846) - you deserved it (10087)
On 09/26/2011 at 12:58pm - misc - by Yuuucky (woman) - Canada (Quebec)
Today, while resting in bed, I felt a slight tickle on my neck. Thinking it was a cockroach, I panicked and flung it across the bedroom. Turns out it was my brand new necklace, which is now broken into dozens of pieces. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9283) - you deserved it (19889)
On 09/24/2011 at 4:23am - misc - by deee21 - Australia (New South Wales)
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