Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Rollercoaster

Search for a member

Rollercoaster

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 18 November 1988 (25 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 14823
  • Number of comments : 49
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Rollercoaster : Take a bite out life while you can. Don't waste your time feeling ashamed of past mistakes.

Rollercoaster's page activity

Visits<b>YouMadBra</b> - the 09/28/2014 at 4:56pm<b>doctorhook86</b> - the 09/27/2014 at 2:32am<b>CryoShock</b> - the 09/07/2014 at 7:04pm<b>stonedfly3</b> - the 08/27/2014 at 1:09am<b>seifsoliman</b> - the 08/18/2014 at 8:15pm<b>mip_92</b> - the 06/30/2014 at 1:40am<b>abc1097</b> - the 06/23/2014 at 12:13pm<b>citrusfruit</b> - the 06/11/2014 at 10:34pm<b>RoseWithThorns</b> - the 05/23/2014 at 8:23am<b>MattG2105</b> - the 02/23/2014 at 2:45pm<b>Deuce69420</b> - the 10/13/2013 at 11:33pm<b>ShadowReaper101</b> - the 07/10/2013 at 3:07am<b>claire_schmidt</b> - the 06/01/2013 at 5:15pm<b>Metzler31</b> - the 01/02/2013 at 5:29pm<b>cnator</b> - the 11/29/2012 at 12:17am<b>ha</b> - the 03/11/2010 at 5:46pm<b>baby_gurl2405</b> - the 12/15/2009 at 7:11pm<b>kayla_f_babyyy</b> - the 11/02/2009 at 11:59am

Rollercoaster's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

Rollercoaster's favorite FMLs

Today, I was at a party where I ate bowl of disgusting snacks because I didn't want to drink on an empty stomach. I spent the next twelve hours trying to prevent the world from collapsing into millions of demonic shards, cause apparently that's what a large dose of magic mushrooms does. FML

#6298765
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18622) - you deserved it (32277)

On 11/14/2009 at 8:37am - misc - by swedishdude (man) - Sweden (Skane Lan)

Today, I finally got into a yoga class with the instructor I've been crushing on for 2 years. As he walked closer to greet me, I lifted my leg over my head into a full split, and queefed obnoxiously loud. He responded with his gag reflex. FML

#3241027
236 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44911) - you deserved it (26761)

On 06/26/2009 at 12:51pm - misc - by LondonKitsch (woman) - United States

Today, I walked into the bathroom and found my sister cleaning her vibrator. With my toothbrush. FML

#2740699
363 comments

I agree, your life sucks (117617) - you deserved it (7299)

On 06/09/2009 at 12:18pm - intimacy - by quadropheniac (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, my girlfriend of 2 years and I decided to have sex for the first time. When we were in the room, finally ready to start, she confessed that she had never seen a penis before. To make her more comfortable, I showed her mine. At the sight of it, well, she actually fainted. FML

#2182938
381 comments

I agree, your life sucks (83386) - you deserved it (10219)

On 05/22/2009 at 3:50pm - intimacy - by herve (man) - Lebanon (Beyrouth)

Today, I was hanging out with a few of my friends, including an old ex-girlfriend and her current boyfriend of 5 years. When my ex, whose virginity I had taken years earlier, mentioned, "I had the iPhone first," without thinking, I immediately responded, "Well, I had YOU first." FML

#2103981
240 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18650) - you deserved it (88094)

On 05/20/2009 at 1:10am - intimacy - by Takuma (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was babysitting a really bratty little girl. She came and cuddled up on the couch so I took it as an apology. I feel asleep while she was sitting with me and when I woke up she had peed on me. She locked herself in her room and was laughing about peeing on me for discipling her. FML

#1861801
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52228) - you deserved it (6570)

On 05/11/2009 at 11:43pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I was fingering my girlfriend. When suddenly she started crying at the peak of her orgasm, when I asked what was wrong, she replied. "I-I-I MISS HIM!" She was crying about her ex boyfriend. While I was inside her. FML

#1453860
314 comments

I agree, your life sucks (149021) - you deserved it (11855)

On 04/29/2009 at 11:47am - intimacy - by fingerfuckd (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my grandmother gave me a huge speech on being abstinent until marriage. Being the honest person that I am, I told her I wasn't a virgin anymore. Instead of being mad and telling me I was going to hell. She asked me what my favourite things to do sexually were. And told me hers in detail. FML

#918397
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (72949) - you deserved it (18920)

On 04/11/2009 at 8:20pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, my grandmother gave me a huge speech on being abstinent until marriage. Being the honest person that I am, I told her I wasn't a virgin anymore. Instead of being mad and telling me I was going to hell. She asked me what my favourite things to do sexually were. And told me hers in detail. FML

#918397
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (72949) - you deserved it (18920)

On 04/11/2009 at 8:20pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I went on a date with a guy for the first time. We went to Starbucks and got coffee. We talked for a while, and we were joking and having a good time. Suddenly, he put his hand on my stomach and said, "Soon, this will be plump with my seed." FML

#836792
926 comments

I agree, your life sucks (350558) - you deserved it (38691)

On 04/06/2009 at 3:39pm - misc - by creepermagnet (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I babysat for two little girls, who wanted to play 'mermaids'. I smiled, and said that I would love to play with them. The older girl laughed, saying "You can't be a mermaid. Mermaids are pretty." FML

#614734
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (77282) - you deserved it (4552)

On 03/25/2009 at 11:45pm - kids - by babysitter (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I decided to tell my mom about my choice to wait to have sex until after marriage. Coming from a very christian family I thought she would be proud. Instead she laughed and said, "is that your excuse for not being able to get laid?" and walked out of the room. FML

#283028
279 comments

I agree, your life sucks (263813) - you deserved it (48296)

On 03/12/2009 at 1:53pm - intimacy - by sucks - United States

Today, I was pulled over because I looked like a possible suspect for a robbery. While searching me, the police's radio went off and the person on the other line said, "Possible suspect, 5'5", thin" - the officer stopped right then and murmured, "too short and fat" and walked back to his car. FML

#263421
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54262) - you deserved it (4207)

On 03/10/2009 at 7:03pm - health - by yodada (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was at work and a very obese woman came in to get a pedicure. When she took her shoes off I noticed an odd black substance on her feet. I started scrubbing it off and wondered out loud, "What IS this stuff??" As a chunk of it fell onto my lip, she replied, "Girl, that's just the fungus." FML

#259526
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (101300) - you deserved it (6313)

On 03/10/2009 at 7:55am - work - by SalonGirl (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my mother and I went to Wal-Mart to buy pads. I suggested I get tampons instead, so that I can go swimming at my boyfriend's cottage. My mother then goes to the nearest store employee and asks, "excuse me, if my daughter uses a tampon, does that mean she is no longer a virgin?" FML

#251967
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (182376) - you deserved it (13193)

On 03/09/2009 at 3:30pm - intimacy - by tamponmayhem (woman) - Canada (Ontario)



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Zach's illustrated FML
  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: