Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

RiverD23

Offline (4 hours ago) | Search for a member

RiverD23

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Sunday 12 February 1995 (19 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1270
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

RiverD23's page activity

Visits<b>MARGIE9</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 6:32pm<b>shadyladyhh</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 5:47pm

RiverD23's FML badges

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

See all of RiverD23's badges

RiverD23's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to explain to my boyfriend that the reason I don't want to stay overnight at his house is because I still occasionally wet the bed. FML

#7614301
235 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36037) - you deserved it (7280)

On 01/27/2010 at 3:33pm - health - by anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, during an episode of King of Queens that my boyfriend has seen more than once, I decided I'd try to get a little frisky. I straddled him while he was on the bed and began taking my clothes of. He pushed me out of the way and said, 'don't get naked in front of the TV.' FML

#7467691
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21099) - you deserved it (3741)

On 01/21/2010 at 12:28am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend and I were about to have sex. He tried to put it in unerected. He was serious. FML

#7103723
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19757) - you deserved it (3180)

On 01/02/2010 at 12:22pm - intimacy - by xxxzzzooo (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my boyfriend had to be hospitalized to drain poison from a bad spider bite. His mom is convinced that he got it from my house and won't let him come over anymore. I suppose she's right, because guess who found a spider web under their bed today, along with 5 new spider bites? FML

#7098506
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29011) - you deserved it (4000)

On 01/02/2010 at 2:50am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was studying for one of my finals that I had later in the week but decided to take a break and play around with my boyfriend in bed for a couple hours. We decided to 69 for the first time, and everything was going great until out of nowhere, I loudly farted in his face. FML

#6753336
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22730) - you deserved it (9455)

On 12/14/2009 at 5:24pm - intimacy - by Gassy (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was studying for one of my finals that I had later in the week but decided to take a break and play around with my boyfriend in bed for a couple hours. We decided to 69 for the first time, and everything was going great until out of nowhere, I loudly farted in his face. FML

#6753336
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22730) - you deserved it (9455)

On 12/14/2009 at 5:24pm - intimacy - by Gassy (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was in a meeting at work. In the middle of our CEO's speech, I farted. Everyone heard including my boss, who looked over and said, "Do you have anything else you wanted to add?" FML

#6708463
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15477) - you deserved it (21269)

On 12/11/2009 at 1:11pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, it was the last day of finals. After sleeping less than three hours in the last two days, I got in the car to go to school. For a second, I thought my steering wheel, the gas pedal, and brake pedal were all missing. That's when I realized I was sitting in the back seat. FML

#6692026
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28996) - you deserved it (12416)

On 12/10/2009 at 8:08am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, me and my girlfriend were riding on my motorcycle. While at a stop light, she started to make these weird noises. Turns out she was having an orgasm. I still can't give her one. FML

#6534520
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24120) - you deserved it (5416)

On 11/30/2009 at 3:35pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I took my daughter to the zoo. I threw a piece of my sandwich towards a very cute chimpanzee. As a thank you, he threw a piece of crap at me, which exploded all over my shirt. FML

#6482495
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9211) - you deserved it (42805)

On 11/27/2009 at 6:36pm - misc - by Thanks (man) - United Kingdom (Northamptonshire)

Today, like many other days, I fell asleep in math class. Unlike other days, however, I woke up with a start while ripping a really loud fart in my sleep. The whole class heard it because it was during a lecture. Even the teacher was laughing at me and I had to walk, no, run out of the room. FML

#6431680
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8610) - you deserved it (25045)

On 11/24/2009 at 12:57am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, my girlfriend broke up me with for being the "perfect boyfriend". Apparently I'm the best boyfriend she's ever had, and she didn't know how to take it. So she dumped me. FML

#6414657
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41927) - you deserved it (3290)

On 11/22/2009 at 10:59pm - love - by Micheal (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, as I put on my pajamas, a large spider ran down my leg. After freaking out, killing it, and recomposing myself, I went to the bathroom. As I sat down to go to the toilet, I looked up to see hundreds of baby spiders hanging over my head. FML

#6389255
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42756) - you deserved it (3454)

On 11/21/2009 at 6:40am - animals - by AussieGirl (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was walking around in Target with my friends and the guy I've liked for a long time. As we approached the patio section, I sat down on a chair only to hear a big wet watery sound. I got up and realized that I had just sat in some little kid's diarrhea. FML

#6378888
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41589) - you deserved it (6639)

On 11/20/2009 at 10:35am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was reading my students' Halloween stories I made them write for my creative writing class in high school. One of my students wrote about attacking me. She got my street address perfect and everything. FML

#6268890
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38693) - you deserved it (4021)

On 11/12/2009 at 2:17am - kids - by Teaching (man) - United States (California)



FML's blog

  • Krumla's Illustrated FML
  • It's Friday, so a bold font is required. I was sitting in my caravan by the side of busy road cooking cocktail sausages over a gas stove when I realised it was time to start writing something about this…

Friday 24 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: