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RitzBitzFei

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RitzBitzFei

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  • Number of visits : 2419
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Visits<b>ninjanick1911</b> - the 02/28/2014 at 10:35pm

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RitzBitzFei's favorite FMLs

Today, I bought a kitten. I've wanted a cat for years and decided to finally buy one now that I have my own apartment. It turns out I'm allergic to cats. FML

#4570949
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37131) - you deserved it (9204)

On 08/16/2009 at 11:18am - animals - by annabellebyebye (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I got a paper cut while opening my box of Band-Aids. FML

#4566458
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49117) - you deserved it (8670)

On 08/16/2009 at 3:05am - health - by irony (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I found out my husband had bought my 1-year-old daughter a shirt that says "Birth Control Fail" in pink glittery letters. He even took her out in it while I was at work. FML

#4525246
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59822) - you deserved it (7155)

On 08/14/2009 at 12:57pm - kids - by ohgod (woman) - United States (Iowa)

Today, I found out that 15 years ago my father threw out my college acceptance letters so that I could stay home and take over the family's funeral home business. FML

#4508324
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (86202) - you deserved it (2886)

On 08/13/2009 at 7:29pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, as a supervisor at a water park, several clients came up to me and complained about a topless girl in our wave pool. I found the girl, called her out, and politely told her that she was not allowed in the pool without a top. "She" was a fat 15 year old boy. FML

#4478498
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51759) - you deserved it (7033)

On 08/12/2009 at 4:13pm - misc - by auslander (man) - Switzerland (Zurich)

Today, I told my mom about how my friend is going to China for a year instead of college. My mom suggested that I could do the same. When I told her that a trip to China is probably more expensive than my college tuition, my mom replied, "Not for a one way ticket". FML

#4454040
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39555) - you deserved it (6031)

On 08/11/2009 at 4:31pm - misc - by unwanted - Canada

Today, my mother sat me down to tell me that since coming home from college, I sounded like "a liberated woman". She was disappointed and disturbed by this and said that I should stop having strong opinions and ideals because it would make finding a husband for me difficult. FML

#4448635
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49807) - you deserved it (6703)

On 08/11/2009 at 10:57am - misc - by liberatedwoman (woman) - Oman (Masqat)

Today, I was home alone. I didn't expect anyone to be anywhere near home, so when I got out of the shower, I walked to the living room, naked, to get the tv remote for my room. Only to find the UPS guy standing at our glass front door. I screamed... so did he. FML

#4447976
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39039) - you deserved it (16939)

On 08/11/2009 at 10:01am - misc - by Lilly_28 (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I was alone with a work acquaintance at lunch. A noise came from his pocket; he whipped out his iPod Touch and said "Sorry, I have to take this," before walking away with the iPod to his ear. Not only did he not want to talk to me, he thought I was stupid enough to confuse an iPod with a phone. FML

#4446947
309 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41966) - you deserved it (13707)

On 08/11/2009 at 8:17am - work - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I went to Safeway. Go in, get stuff, come out, and I have almost no room to get into my car because an SUV was parked in a compact spot next to me all crooked. Irritated, I got a pen and paper and wrote 'Nice parking you F*ing idiot' and stuck it on the windshield. Then I notice someone was in the SUV. FML

#4442846
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14146) - you deserved it (41517)

On 08/11/2009 at 1:52am - misc - by Amanda (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I got stuck in an elevator. After ringing the alarm bell consistantly for 10 minutes, I called someone I was staying with. She went down to the front desk and said that there were people stuck in the elevator. Front desk- "Is that what that is? I thought it was some kids messing around." FML

Today, I found out that not only has my father been cheating on my mother with another woman, but they have a child together with the same name as me. FML

Today, as a joke, my friends and I decided to put me in a dress and makeup, to creep out a friend. I'm a guy. I'm not sure which is worse, the fact that I so willingly volunteered to wear the dress and the makeup, or the fact that I thought it was comfy and made me look slim. FML

#4402387
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11891) - you deserved it (49707)

On 08/09/2009 at 3:31am - misc - by twitch01 (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I found out that when you chase a couple of squirrels off your porch for irritating your dogs, sometimes they chase you back. FML

#4397951
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33218) - you deserved it (13577)

On 08/09/2009 at 12:22am - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)



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