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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 27 July 1991 (25 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3536
  • Number of comments : 13
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 8 posted

About Rickymonkeypants : Meh...Fuck It

Rickymonkeypants's page activity

Visits<b>Liv3366</b> - the 03/12/2016 at 9:35am<b>GodSquad87</b> - the 02/16/2016 at 6:43am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/04/2015 at 9:38am<b>StevoKing666</b> - the 02/27/2015 at 1:26am<b>cwrocker</b> - the 10/10/2014 at 4:11pm<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/27/2014 at 5:22pm<b></b> - the 01/11/2011 at 10:25am<b>Cinn</b> - the 06/17/2010 at 9:38am<b>bird12345678</b> - the 06/12/2010 at 3:48pm<b>kevclau2214</b> - the 04/25/2010 at 3:09am<b>Insert_Wit_Here</b> - the 03/25/2010 at 1:35pm<b>Kenshin220</b> - the 03/25/2010 at 9:04am<b>peoplehater</b> - the 03/25/2010 at 9:03am<b>mushoo</b> - the 02/18/2010 at 5:37am

Rickymonkeypants's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

Rickymonkeypants's favorite FMLs

Today, after driving a few hours late at night I decided to entertain the car tailgating me by not letting him pass. After doing this for 3miles, reaching 93MPH, I decided to let the car pass me. When I switched lanes, the car tailgating me light up in red and blue. It was a cop. FML

by Anonymous / 04/26/2009 at 5:50pm / United States (Virginia) / Transportation

Today, I was going on a plane to Chicago. My passport picture is 6 years old, and back then I was a beautiful model. Now, I gave birth to a child and gained 50 lbs. When I showed my passport to the airport atendents, I got arrested for stealing someones passport. FML

by chococool223 / 04/12/2009 at 6:51am / Korea Republic of (Seoul-t'ukpyolsi) / Transportation

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was at the gym with my friends when they invited me to do a few bench presses. Since I'd never done any before, I decided to start with no weights on the bar and work my way up from there. I wound up pinned beneath the bar, calling for my friend to come free me. FML

by MarcusJones713 / 04/08/2009 at 7:17am / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous

Today, my patient, a chubby little girl, stood on a scale to measure her weight. She was 5 yrs old and weighed 65 lbs. I started giving her advice on eating healthy: fruits, vegetables, and more greens. She turned to her mother giving a look of shock and said, "But mommy, the doctor is fat too!" FML

by Shnur / 04/05/2009 at 12:25am / United States (California) / Kids

Today, at my job as a cashier, a man and his 3-year old son got in line. The father said, "Give this to the pretty lady," looking at me. The kid looks at me, looks at his dad, and walks over to the next cashier. FML

by Nottheprettylady / 04/04/2009 at 9:07pm / Canada (Ontario) / Kids

Today, I was talking to my guy friend about prom. I told him I was turned down by 7 guys. So he said "Well, you could always ask me." I then said "Do you want to go to prom with me?" His response was "Nope...now that's 8!" FML

by rejected / 03/27/2009 at 8:38pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Love

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me over the phone. He said there was someone else, and that he has been in love with her for a while. Turns out, the new girl was his online video game character. I got dumped for a video game. FML

by w00tz / 03/27/2009 at 1:12am / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, I found a bell that had been tied into the tassel of my ski hat by my twin sister as part of a longstanding prank war between us. I'm deaf and have apparently been jingling like an elf for over a week. FML

by hipprep83 / 03/20/2009 at 1:40pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got to my underground parking garage at work and saw my boss pulling into a spot. I thought I would show him my reverse parking skills and decided to park beside him. As I was pulling in he opened his door to get out and I smashed into it, nearly running him over. FML

by mikej1985 / 03/20/2009 at 1:11pm / Canada (Ontario) / Work

Today, I was writing a very important email to my college professor. I went upstairs for something and came back down to send it. I later asked him today why he hadn't responded to which he said "I'm flattered...but can't." My roommate had added "love you xxx" at the end of the email. FML

by dntstopmenow / 03/14/2009 at 1:27am / United Kingdom (Belfast) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had drunk sex with a girl that I barely know. I didn't have a condom and was nervous about getting her pregnant, but she assured me that I could pull out. Right when I was about to pull out, she wrapped her legs around me and yelled, "BE MY BABY'S DADDY!" I couldn't get out in time. FML

by RC3Welly / 03/09/2009 at 6:58pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, my wife told me that she wanted a divorce. It is also my 39th birthday today. For my birthday present, she gave me a subscription to match.com. FML

by you would / 03/04/2009 at 12:15am / United States (California) / Love

Today, I went to chill with my best guy friend and his girlfriend, whom I recently met after I moved to the area. After a few beers, my buddy leaned over and tried to make out with me. I quickly backed up and shockingly looked over at his girlfriend to expect the same reaction. She winked. FML

by LilShawty2000 / 02/24/2009 at 12:30am / United States (Virginia) / Intimacy

Today, I arrived at my parents house for dinner. When I got there, I noticed that they had gay pride flags hanging from the porch, and gay rights bumper stickers plastered to their cars. There was also a huge "We accept you, Nick" banner hanging from the garage. I'M NOT GAY! FML

by Nick / 02/22/2009 at 10:04pm / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

Today, we wrote valentine's day poems in class. I wrote a very depressing poem about how I was rejected by all the girls I like and how it hurt to be alone. When it was read to the class, they laughed and told me it was hilarious. Even the teacher. FML

by Yudansha / 02/13/2009 at 10:10pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous