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RenoTheRhino

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RenoTheRhino

1Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 4 September 1934 (80 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 716
  • Number of comments : 148
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About RenoTheRhino : Hey, I'm Reno. (That's not my name.) Yes, I really am 80 years old. (No I'm not.) I pride myself in being part of renowned international botany clubs, as well as knitting, sewing, and quilting legions. I participate in underwater basket weaving, lacrosse, cricket, conk smashing, sheep counting, dodgeball, camel racing, curling, frisbee, stair climbing, hackie-sack, and in my spare time, chasing a block of cheese down a giant hill.
What rock group has 4 members that don't sing?


Mount Rushmore.

Why can't you hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom?


Because the "p" is silent! As well as the fact that they're all dead. The only thing coming from their bodies now are fossil fuels.

RenoTheRhino's page activity

Visits<b>mmahone9</b> - 8 hours ago<b>cutycat136</b> - yesterday at 6:42pm<b>wowwzaa</b> - the 12/17/2014 at 11:20pm<b>feven</b> - the 12/10/2014 at 6:40am<b>Andrew6499</b> - the 11/13/2014 at 10:00pm<b>teggrito</b> - the 10/22/2014 at 4:12pm<b>ktmla</b> - the 10/22/2014 at 2:02pm<b>coldwar252</b> - the 10/21/2014 at 4:20pm<b>notfat14</b> - the 10/14/2014 at 12:46am<b>Ninjin1986</b> - the 09/26/2014 at 5:31am<b>Tyde</b> - the 09/22/2014 at 2:18am<b>Miranda_F</b> - the 09/13/2014 at 5:16pm<b>ford99</b> - the 09/08/2014 at 7:05am<b>dying_to_know</b> - the 09/08/2014 at 2:44am<b>missmandersxoxo</b> - the 09/07/2014 at 2:36am<b>lynz1193</b> - the 09/07/2014 at 12:46am<b>GEFStryker</b> - the 09/06/2014 at 10:47pm<b>PinkieKeen</b> - the 09/06/2014 at 5:37pm

Liked!<b>dying_to_know</b> - the 09/03/2014 at 3:49pm

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RenoTheRhino's favorite FMLs

Today, while meeting my girlfriend's parents for the first time, her dad made a big show of cleaning his rifle, before loading it, taking aim, and blowing the hell out of a hornet's nest at the back of the yard. I fear for my life. FML

#21124338
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43275) - you deserved it (6053)

On 04/27/2014 at 1:25pm - love - by Shit (man) - United States (California)

Today, I asked my daughter to buy me two pints of milk. Apparently, the shop only had four-pints, so she got that and poured half down the drain. FML

#21099986
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43807) - you deserved it (6371)

On 03/30/2014 at 6:04am - kids - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Havering)

Today, my teacher told us at least 7 different stories about his cat, Jeremy, and how much he eats. And he wonders why we never get anything done in his class. FML

#21097211
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35244) - you deserved it (3199)

On 03/26/2014 at 7:45pm - animals - by alicia75 - United States (Indiana)

Today, at my job as a bouncer at a music venue, a guy got his nose broken in a rowdy mosh pit. When I went to help him up and see if he was okay, he said, "It was an accident, please don't kick me out," but the word "please" came out as a hot spray of his blood across my face. FML

Today, while we were having sex, my boyfriend asked me, "Who's your daddy?" I actually started thinking about my father. Total buzzkill. FML

Today, my 5-year-old son thought it'd be a good idea to pee into the heat vent in the hallway of our apartment building. The whole building now smells like urine. The landlord is a 6-foot ex-convict. He wants answers. FML

#21080782
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43889) - you deserved it (6310)

On 03/07/2014 at 8:16pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was driving along when I noticed a kid struggling to push his car up the crest of a hill. I jumped out to help him, and he acted surprised to see me. Once we got the car over the hill, it rolled on down. I then saw that no one was actually in the driver's seat. I'd helped a vandal. FML

Today, I took a nap in my car right after finishing up at work. I was woken up by a hobo sitting in the passenger seat, watching me sleep. Apparently, he'd managed to unlock the door with a wire hanger. FML

#21027083
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45840) - you deserved it (5384)

On 01/13/2014 at 10:31pm - misc - by ShelterForTheHomless (woman) - United States (California)

Today, to avoid a guy who's been creepily following me around school lately, I ducked into the girl's bathroom. After few minutes, he stuck his head in with his eyes closed and asked if I was done yet. FML

#21021456
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59633) - you deserved it (4356)

On 01/08/2014 at 3:27pm - misc - by stalked - United States (Florida)

Today, I had to explain to one of my high school students that the importance of Pearl Harbor was not, in fact, because the Japanese stole the US pearl supply. FML

#21020544
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41566) - you deserved it (3585)

On 01/07/2014 at 7:00pm - work - by tpj24 - United States (Iowa)

Today, I woke up to every window in my house packed with snow. It was so bad that I thought I'd been snowed-in, and I started freaking out. It took two hours and multiple phone calls before I found out that my neighbor had taken our prank war too seriously and staged the whole thing. FML

#21015630
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36755) - you deserved it (11928)

On 01/03/2014 at 4:04pm - misc - by thanks.... (man) - United States

Today, my 8-year-old came home from school crying. Apparently her teacher told the whole class to write about how they felt when they learned that Santa Claus and the Tooth Fairy weren't real. FML

#20942077
281 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52902) - you deserved it (5244)

On 11/02/2013 at 12:19am - kids - by SantaClaus - United States (California)

Today, my family got together for a big game of paintball. My grandpa wanted to play too, but I told him he was a bit too old for such a rough sport. He joined anyway, and spent the whole 2 hours hunting my dumb ass down. I'm now in constant pain after being riddled with paintballs. FML

#20941762
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21430) - you deserved it (50275)

On 11/01/2013 at 7:55pm - health - by nl4 (man) - Israel (Tel Aviv)



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