Submit your FML story
- - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Offline (5 minutes ago) | Search for a member
About RenoTheRhino : Hey, I'm Reno. (That's not my name.) Yes, I really am 80 years old. (No I'm not.) I pride myself in being part of renowned international botany clubs, as well as knitting, sewing, and quilting legions. I participate in underwater basket weaving, lacrosse, cricket, conk smashing, sheep counting, dodgeball, camel racing, curling, frisbee, stair climbing, hackie-sack, and in my spare time, chasing a wheel of cheese down a giant hill.
What rock group has 4 members that don't sing?
Why can't you hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom?
Because the "p" is silent! As well as the fact that they're all dead. The only thing coming from their bodies now are fossil fuels.
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.
You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
Today, I was talking to my friend in Spanish because he understands it better than English. We were in the middle of a discussion about a TV show when some guy from our school ran up, spat on my shoes and screamed, "I SPEAK SPANISH, STOP TALKING ABOUT ME!" and ran away. FML
Today, I got shitfaced at a club. A cute girl I'd met earlier in the evening offered to drive me home in my car and spend the night with me. She crashed my car and did a runner before the cops showed up. They wouldn't believe my story. I now have a wrecked car and a DUI. FML
Today, a customer came in with a laptop smashed beyond repair. She asked if we could recover her files, but thanks to my idiot boss' new store policy I had to ask her a bunch of questions, including if she had tried "turning it on and off". She stared at me, speechless, like I was a complete moron. FML
Tuesday 3 March 2015