Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Redoxx

Search for a member

Redoxx

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4432
  • Number of comments : 541
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 8 posted

About Redoxx : FYL....FYL indeed.

I mean the Lannisters killed me and my entire family but you don't hear me complaining. I take life as it comes. You think your life sucks? Let's see you spend a day in Westeros and see how life can really blow. In the words of Old Nan "what do you know of fear?".

Oh and uh...Winter is coming. Damn if I care though. Not like it snows in hell. Which reminds me, if you wanna feel sorry for someone feel sorry for Jon Snow, now that guy's got it rough. Plus my father is his father so you know that's not gonna end well. Welp that's my rant. And in case anybody's wondering, I'm rooting for Arya cause let's be real, Sansa's not the brightest candle on the chandelier. (Former) King of the North signing out.

Redoxx's page activity

Visits<b>wopchop12</b> - the 07/24/2014 at 11:03pm<b>watermelon1</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 6:58pm<b>zeriously95</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 12:36pm<b>baddayeveryday1</b> - the 07/06/2014 at 1:54pm<b>lizardFace</b> - the 07/06/2014 at 9:29am<b>Medieval_Unicorn</b> - the 07/06/2014 at 9:06am<b>SuperDani</b> - the 07/06/2014 at 7:51am<b>okibi1</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 10:49am<b>IvonaNik</b> - the 07/01/2014 at 5:13pm<b>Bluemoonie</b> - the 07/01/2014 at 1:12am<b>mcm_3</b> - the 06/27/2014 at 6:57am<b>ireply_wlyrics</b> - the 06/26/2014 at 8:53am<b>itsdav</b> - the 06/25/2014 at 1:56pm<b>bburton1986</b> - the 06/25/2014 at 4:36am<b>spork_of_doom</b> - the 06/25/2014 at 12:19am<b>mkay60455</b> - the 06/24/2014 at 12:52am<b>yolomaster101</b> - the 06/22/2014 at 11:23pm<b>stephaniewlntwsk</b> - the 06/22/2014 at 9:28pm

Redoxx's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

See all of Redoxx's badges

Redoxx's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend let me be the first one to read the novel he dropped out of college to write. Turns out it's titled "A Brief History of Ass" and is an incoherent ramble about every time we've had anal sex. FML

#20989324
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50259) - you deserved it (7995)

On 12/11/2013 at 7:51pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I saw my friend's car in front of school. I'd had a bad day and just wanted to talk with her. I got in and sat down, and felt something squish beneath me. Turns out it wasn't actually my friend's car, and I'd just sat on a random woman's cake. FML

#20978310
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35392) - you deserved it (24800)

On 12/02/2013 at 3:04pm - misc - by Sherressa (woman) - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, I called the police to report that my car had been keyed. I remember going to a bar last night and getting drunk. A surveillance camera revealed that after my drunken self couldn't unlock the door to my car, I punched the door and hurt my fist so bad that I keyed my own car. FML

#20977883
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18627) - you deserved it (48948)

On 12/02/2013 at 1:41am - misc - by car keyer (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I had a nightmare in which I was haunted by the ghost of my foreskin. I then spent the whole day moping around, wondering what my life would've been like if my parents hadn't opted to slice it off. Will I see you in heaven, long-lost ghostly foreskin? FML

#20972170
237 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30941) - you deserved it (14700)

On 11/27/2013 at 3:44am - health - by MissYouPieceOfSkin (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, my mom visited. While she was using the bathroom, my man-child of a husband thought it would be funny to knock on the bathroom door with his penis, thinking it was me in there. She opened the door to find him standing there doing the "helicopter". FML

#20969751
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54823) - you deserved it (5801)

On 11/25/2013 at 12:22am - intimacy - by LadyLola (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to try flavored condoms. I guess I enjoyed them a little too much; I almost choked half to death on a strawberry cockcicle. FML

#20961988
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42721) - you deserved it (17412)

On 11/18/2013 at 10:26am - intimacy - by flavored (woman) - United States

Today, some kids used firecrackers to blow up my mailbox. This is the third time this week. FML

#20961862
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37144) - you deserved it (3241)

On 11/18/2013 at 5:14am - kids - by kids next door - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I donated blood. Afterwards, I regained consciousness on the floor with a half-eaten cookie in my mouth. FML

Today, I superglued the sole back into my shoe. Unfortunately, the glue didn't dry as quickly as it said it would on the bottle. The glue seeped through the sole and my foot got superglued to my shoe. FML

#20956277
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38858) - you deserved it (11084)

On 11/13/2013 at 12:51pm - misc - by footstuck - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my sister introduced our parents to her new boyfriend. He's my boyfriend, and he told me he was going to be out of state for a few weeks on business. FML

Today, at a grocery store, a man came up to me while I was picking out apples and whispered in my ear, "That's how Snow White died." FML

#20947922
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42545) - you deserved it (3854)

On 11/06/2013 at 4:16pm - misc - by awkward - Canada (Alberta)

Today, the guy I really like asked me if I'd like to go to a hockey game this weekend. I said I'd love to go, so he said, "Then you'd best get a ticket soon before they sell out." I still don't know if I have a date or not. FML

#20947685
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43802) - you deserved it (3998)

On 11/06/2013 at 12:29pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Iowa)

Today, as my wife and I were getting intimate, I thought I would try a little "dirty talk". I whispered in her ear that I would "dick her down good". She couldn't stop laughing. FML

#20946325
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26210) - you deserved it (52554)

On 11/05/2013 at 10:26am - intimacy - by Something I said? (man) - United States (New York)

Today, while teaching juniors about black holes, I said, "Imagine everything being sucked into a black hole." An African-American student shouted, "I'd better start clenching!" Nobody took the lesson seriously after that. FML

#20946225
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43016) - you deserved it (5217)

On 11/05/2013 at 8:22am - work - by regretsteachinghighschool - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I had the pleasure of driving in central London for the first time, to recover my drunk husband from his own brilliance, puking on the feet of Winston Churchill's statue in Parliament Square. At 4 am. FML

#20944193
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36574) - you deserved it (3223)

On 11/03/2013 at 5:53pm - love - by I am not amused! (woman) - United Kingdom (Hampshire)



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #1: Getting there
  • A lot of people will spout off the tired old cliché that the destination isn't as important as the journey itself. Well, what if you're on your way to the Playboy Mansion then?…

Tuesday 22 July 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: