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RedX1000FML's favorite FMLs
by Ellie / 10/09/2013 at 7:15pm / United States (Kansas) / Work
by resurrected / 09/04/2013 at 11:59am / United Kingdom (West Sussex) / Work
Today, in a fit of paranoid hysteria, my mom threw out my phone, claiming the NSA can look through the camera to spy on me. I guess that's why you're still using your own phone to sext your latest boyfriend, eh mom? FML
by whoriblemomindeed / 06/20/2013 at 12:02pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
by jku / 01/02/2012 at 8:18am / United States (Montana) / Miscellaneous
by ifailsobadly / 08/13/2011 at 4:22pm / United Kingdom (Worcestershire) / Miscellaneous
by ChubbyTubby / 01/17/2010 at 1:13pm / United States (Georgia) / Geek
Today, I took this gorgeous girl from work to eat at Olive Garden. I was trying to be romantic and had the waiter bring two glasses of wine. I guess she doesn't really drink wine, she covered her fettucini Alfredo in vomit. After dinner, she thanked me with a french kiss. FML
by Anonymous / 10/30/2009 at 2:02am / United States (California) / Love
Today, I was feeling really horny. I decided to send dirty texts to my girlfriend. I sent the first and she didn't reply, so I sent more and more and then I got one back saying 'Stay away from my little girl.' FML
by Oops54321 / 09/28/2009 at 3:12am / France (Midi-Pyrenees) / Intimacy
by fmysexlife / 07/27/2009 at 1:06am / United States (New Hampshire) / Intimacy
Today, I stepped outside to wait for a cute guy to arrive after arduously preparing for our first date. Just as he rounded the corner, I tripped over the last stair and landed headfirst into my mom's fresh pot of snapdragons. My mom uses compost and manure for her plants. FML
by flowerfail / 06/16/2009 at 5:13am / United States (Illinois) / Love
by SoClose / 02/03/2009 at 9:25am / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy
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- 1Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his… 2Today, my boyfriend finally told me that he loved me. This would've been fantastic if he didn't say… 3Today, it's been 2 weeks since I ordered a printer so I could print schoolwork, that way I don't…