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RedLust

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RedLust

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 602
  • Number of comments : 4
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 1 posted

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RedLust's page activity

Visits<b>sohuja</b> - the 07/30/2014 at 3:35am<b>IceMan0699</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 8:16pm<b>odell687</b> - the 07/18/2014 at 6:30pm<b>badmoments</b> - the 07/11/2014 at 11:20pm<b>Allusivness</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 9:50am<b>dancinwookie</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 8:33pm<b>incoherentrmblr</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 1:38pm<b>iMeowchu</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 12:51pm<b>StupidMonkey497</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 12:37am<b>Lilly2shoes</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 11:52pm<b>starcaller17</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 11:00pm<b>TRaww21</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 8:22pm<b>jojimugo</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 7:35pm<b>k_smitty</b> - the 05/02/2014 at 4:22pm<b>aquaticmammal624</b> - the 02/19/2014 at 6:20pm<b>badlucksabrina</b> - the 12/31/2013 at 3:26am<b>ireply_wlyrics</b> - the 09/07/2013 at 3:26am<b>klovemachine</b> - the 03/23/2013 at 12:11am

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You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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RedLust's favorite FMLs

Today, my dad picked me up from school, something he'll be doing while my broken leg heals. He thought it'd be hilarious to arrive early and ask the staff where his "crippled" son was, loudly saying I'd broken my leg in a "masturbation-related accident". FML

#21259401
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33613) - you deserved it (2988)

On 09/16/2014 at 12:18pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, my husband asked our tax professional if we could file my profession as "Expert Dream Murderer." I'm a guidance counselor. FML

#21251173
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33947) - you deserved it (4505)

On 09/03/2014 at 2:24pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, I dreamed I was wrestling an alligator. I quickly woke up to my girlfriend yelling and me holding her in a headlock. FML

#21247589
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37204) - you deserved it (4992)

On 08/29/2014 at 12:16am - misc - by AgentOrion - United States (Alabama)

Today, I told my husband that I'm jealous of all the other girls whose husbands always take pictures of them together and post them online. He responded by posting a picture of himself, with me on the toilet in the background, captioned "The bitch on the pot." FML

#21241016
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43354) - you deserved it (16466)

On 08/19/2014 at 2:16pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, while walking to work, I saw a homeless guy with a funny "NEED MONEY 4 BOOZE" sign, so I gave him a few spare dollars for his humor. On my way back home, he was out cold on the sidewalk with several empty bottles beside him. Whoops. FML

#21238336
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17765) - you deserved it (34300)

On 08/15/2014 at 5:10pm - money - by thoughthewasjoking (woman) - United States (Alabama)

Today, I went for a romantic, anniversary meal with my wife. It was amazing, until we had to rush home halfway through because our daughter rang, informing us that her 20-year-old sister had broken her wrist trying to jump from the roof, onto the trampoline and into the pool. She 'miscalculated'. FML

#21230823
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39670) - you deserved it (3238)

On 08/06/2014 at 9:21am - kids - by We raised that fool (man) - United Kingdom (Derby)

Today, I was pulled over for distracted driving. I'd been eating a donut. Let's just say the officer didn't appreciate being offered one. FML

#21223797
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39641) - you deserved it (13861)

On 07/29/2014 at 2:20pm - misc - by fatty magoo - United States (Washington)

Today, I was scrubbing the bloody aftermath of a successful mouse trap off of my stove with an old toothbrush. After a few good scrubs, out of habit I put the toothbrush in my mouth while I turned on the water. FML

Today, my vibrator was in another room and I was too lazy to get it. I was also too lazy to do it manually. It's like I've been married to myself for too long. FML

Today, my son got a beating. Apparently, he went to a club, waited until he saw a couple of girls pulling a duckface for a photo, then rushed over and threw pieces of bread at them. Their boyfriends, not too surprisingly, didn't appreciate this. I had to drive the idiot home from the hospital. FML

#21190541
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42912) - you deserved it (6125)

On 06/27/2014 at 5:15pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was driving my 7-year-old daughter to school, when out of nowhere a bird smashed into the windshield. Instead of screaming or being traumatized by the gore like me, my daughter started laughing, eventually calling the bird a "stupid bastard". FML

#21190484
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46052) - you deserved it (8305)

On 06/27/2014 at 4:22pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - Spain (Comunidad Valenciana)

Today, my dad told me that I was conceived while he and my mother were high on LSD. He then stared into the distance, mumbled "Probably explains a few things" and chuckled to himself. FML

#21182176
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41288) - you deserved it (3753)

On 06/20/2014 at 6:05pm - kids - by Alex (man) - United Kingdom (Ealing)

Today, I was feeling frisky and asked my boyfriend if he wanted a blowjob. He said "Fuck no", then rolled over to go to sleep. FML

#21182128
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48315) - you deserved it (8267)

On 06/20/2014 at 5:19pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I came down with diarrhea thanks to a particularly low-class restaurant. My dad has been making constant stupid puns like "pretty shitty state you're in" and "this day and age, you just don't expect this crap". I'm at the point where I want to gouge his eyes out with a goddamn spoon. FML

#21153372
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38896) - you deserved it (6858)

On 05/27/2014 at 1:04pm - health - by fuckmuppet (man) - United Kingdom (Oxfordshire)



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