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RedLust

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RedLust

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 585
  • Number of comments : 4
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 1 posted

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RedLust's page activity

Visits<b>IceMan0699</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 8:16pm<b>odell687</b> - the 07/18/2014 at 6:30pm<b>badmoments</b> - the 07/11/2014 at 11:20pm<b>Allusivness</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 9:50am<b>dancinwookie</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 8:33pm<b>incoherentrmblr</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 1:38pm<b>iMeowchu</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 12:51pm<b>StupidMonkey497</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 12:37am<b>Lilly2shoes</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 11:52pm<b>starcaller17</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 11:00pm<b>TRaww21</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 8:22pm<b>jojimugo</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 7:35pm<b>k_smitty</b> - the 05/02/2014 at 4:22pm<b>aquaticmammal624</b> - the 02/19/2014 at 6:20pm<b>badlucksabrina</b> - the 12/31/2013 at 3:26am<b>ireply_wlyrics</b> - the 09/07/2013 at 3:26am<b>klovemachine</b> - the 03/23/2013 at 12:11am<b>breakingdawnxx3</b> - the 11/14/2009 at 1:34pm

RedLust's FML badges

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You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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RedLust's favorite FMLs

Today, I was scrubbing the bloody aftermath of a successful mouse trap off of my stove with an old toothbrush. After a few good scrubs, out of habit I put the toothbrush in my mouth while I turned on the water. FML

Today, my vibrator was in another room and I was too lazy to get it. I was also too lazy to do it manually. It's like I've been married to myself for too long. FML

Today, my son got a beating. Apparently, he went to a club, waited until he saw a couple of girls pulling a duckface for a photo, then rushed over and threw pieces of bread at them. Their boyfriends, not too surprisingly, didn't appreciate this. I had to drive the idiot home from the hospital. FML

#21190541
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42749) - you deserved it (6110)

On 06/27/2014 at 5:15pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was driving my 7-year-old daughter to school, when out of nowhere a bird smashed into the windshield. Instead of screaming or being traumatized by the gore like me, my daughter started laughing, eventually calling the bird a "stupid bastard". FML

#21190484
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45848) - you deserved it (8285)

On 06/27/2014 at 4:22pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - Spain (Comunidad Valenciana)

Today, my dad told me that I was conceived while he and my mother were high on LSD. He then stared into the distance, mumbled "Probably explains a few things" and chuckled to himself. FML

#21182176
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40726) - you deserved it (3691)

On 06/20/2014 at 6:05pm - kids - by Alex (man) - United Kingdom (Ealing)

Today, I was feeling frisky and asked my boyfriend if he wanted a blowjob. He said "Fuck no", then rolled over to go to sleep. FML

#21182128
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46750) - you deserved it (8098)

On 06/20/2014 at 5:19pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I came down with diarrhea thanks to a particularly low-class restaurant. My dad has been making constant stupid puns like "pretty shitty state you're in" and "this day and age, you just don't expect this crap". I'm at the point where I want to gouge his eyes out with a goddamn spoon. FML

#21153372
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38812) - you deserved it (6851)

On 05/27/2014 at 1:04pm - health - by fuckmuppet (man) - United Kingdom (Oxfordshire)

Today, one of my year 9 students finished the test an hour early. He decided to spend the time by "stealthily" whacking off. His entire desk was shaking in a silent room. FML

Today, I accidentally said the wrong name during sex. That name just happened to be "Sarah", which is both my ex-girlfriend's name and my wife's sister's name. When she asked me which one I meant, I panicked and said, "Both." FML

#21140956
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31539) - you deserved it (50680)

On 05/15/2014 at 6:57pm - intimacy - by FLIPmcCOOL - Ireland (Cork)

Today, I received yet another rejection letter from a college I'd applied to. After crying for a week about how lousy I felt, my older sister gave me all 6 of the acceptance letters she'd been hiding. Turns out she's been forging rejection letters and keeping the real ones in her room. FML

#21140332
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66714) - you deserved it (4940)

On 05/15/2014 at 1:40am - misc - by livingamongtheflowers - United States

Today, I realized that because of my construction job, I have spent such a huge amount of time with older, cynical guys that I keep uncontrollably using the phrase "fucking kids these days" regularly like an idiot. I'm 18. FML

#21139663
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38334) - you deserved it (8088)

On 05/14/2014 at 1:45pm - work - by workfordayzz - United States

Today, I realised the only preparation I've done for my final French exam has been wanking off to French porn. FML

#21135849
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21527) - you deserved it (51519)

On 05/10/2014 at 4:52pm - intimacy - by vivelawank - United Kingdom

Today, while at work as a telemarketer, I called a customer on his home phone. Once I was connected, an automated voice said, "To speak with a customer, please press 1." Confused, I pressed one. I then heard loud laughter followed by, "Oh my god! What a dumbass!" before they hung up. FML

#21133762
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37445) - you deserved it (19872)

On 05/07/2014 at 11:57pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I farted so loudly I not only woke myself up, but my husband as well. He mistook my gas for someone trying to break in and insisted on checking the whole house. I was too embarrassed to tell him the truth. FML

#21125262
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41682) - you deserved it (8498)

On 04/28/2014 at 12:58pm - misc - by gassymomma (woman) - United States (Illinois)



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