Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Ranora

Search for a member

Ranora

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 878
  • Number of comments : 4
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

Ranora's page activity

Visits<b>EconomicCrisis</b> - the 03/13/2012 at 8:40pm<b>inlove72</b> - the 03/05/2012 at 9:51pm<b>katiehilton</b> - the 01/26/2011 at 3:01pm<b>daveb989898</b> - the 01/26/2011 at 1:45pm

Ranora's FML badges

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

See all of Ranora's badges

Ranora's favorite FMLs

Today, I approached my daughter and told her she needs to clean her room. Her response was, "Thank you Captain Obvious." She's 4. FML

#17670632
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27070) - you deserved it (9282)

On 09/05/2011 at 1:04pm - kids - by kidswithnomanners (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I caught my husband farting on my wind-chime in an attempt to make it ring. It did. FML

#17668852
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28117) - you deserved it (4244)

On 09/05/2011 at 8:05am - misc - by Anonymous - Reserved

Today, I was installing updates on my 16 year old daughter's laptop, when I got the urge to snoop around. I found a 5,000 word sex story involving her and the Edward and Jacob weirdos from the Twilight movies. I can't even look her in the eyes. I can't believe I raised this freak. FML

#17589386
679 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30227) - you deserved it (49218)

On 08/26/2011 at 9:13pm - kids - by f*ckingdisgusted - United States

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because I have a "drinking problem". She says I don't drink enough. FML

#17566686
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31919) - you deserved it (5203)

On 08/24/2011 at 7:34am - love - by fmlTGOD - United States

Today, I was invited over to a dinner with the CEOs of my company, along with my two children. My 3 year-old asked loudly why we have two "nose holes", to which my 4 year-old son replied "So you can pick your nose and still breathe!" He then demonstrated. FML

#17088457
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30717) - you deserved it (6383)

On 07/13/2011 at 12:43am - kids - by ohno - United States (Colorado)

Today, I gave a safe sex speech to teens at my local high school. This was just ten minutes after my girlfriend had texted me, telling me she's pregnant. FML

#15038922
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11442) - you deserved it (42665)

On 02/19/2011 at 9:51am - misc - by Anonymous - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, I woke up to a bloody nose. Instead of rushing to the bathroom, I creatively dripped the blood over a knife for photography class because the assignment was to show emotion. So many of the students and faculty were disturbed that I'm now forced to talk to the school psychologist. FML

#15000344
217 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23683) - you deserved it (36266)

On 02/16/2011 at 7:56am - misc - by rhartnett11 -

Today, I went to a restaurant with my boyfriend. Within seconds of getting my drink, I spilled it all over the table and my scarf. When the waiter was helping clean up the spill, he knocked over my boyfriend's drink. All over my pants. FML

#14999054
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27029) - you deserved it (4478)

On 02/16/2011 at 2:40am - misc - by Tori (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I woke up in the middle of the night because I was thirsty. In my groggy state, I grabbed the first bottle of liquid I could find, opened it, and took a sip. It was nail polish remover. FML

#14998091
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16126) - you deserved it (38143)

On 02/16/2011 at 12:55am - misc - by Jade -

Today, my Dad gave me the dreaded sex talk, but he got sidetracked and started talking about how good my mum was in bed. FML

#14998029
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46010) - you deserved it (3680)

On 02/16/2011 at 12:50am - intimacy - by Anonymous -

Today, I had an asthma attack. I grabbed my inhaler and found peanut butter on it. I'm extremely allergic to peanuts. FML

#14997625
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42087) - you deserved it (3500)

On 02/16/2011 at 12:14am - health - by Anonymous - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I decided to wake my fiancé up by giving him a blow-job. When he finally started to wake up he called me by his ex's name. FML

#14791115
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39261) - you deserved it (5694)

On 01/31/2011 at 7:33pm - intimacy - by MollyMadamme -

Today, my girlfriend finally got a Facebook account. Too bad she doesn't know the difference between a wall post and a message. She just described how much she enjoyed our sex last night, in great detail. My mom liked it. FML

#14790156
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47666) - you deserved it (8110)

On 01/31/2011 at 5:46pm - intimacy - by anon - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I got pulled over for a traffic violation. Thinking I could get away with it, I spoke with a French accent. The officer then asked me a question in perfect French. I got a ticket. FML

#14705471
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6929) - you deserved it (49880)

On 01/25/2011 at 1:13am - misc - by nmaidkieavg -

Today, I was at a fire roasting marshmallows. When mine caught on fire, I pulled it back so I could blow out the flames. It flew off the stick, and, still flaming, landed on my face. FML

#14694098
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26969) - you deserved it (5903)

On 01/24/2011 at 1:13am - misc - by crayons128 - United States



FML's blog

  • FML's Thanksgiving Special: TGS
  • As many of us know through popular culture, today is Thanksgiving in the US. Come on, we’ve all seen a TV show involving a Thanksgiving dinner or plans to do so that have gone awry due to one of the main…

Wednesday 26 November 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: