Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

RamboFlowerChild

Offline (7 hours ago) | Search for a member

RamboFlowerChild

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4399
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

RamboFlowerChild's page activity

Visits<b>Wizardo</b> - the 10/29/2013 at 11:50am<b>Faith13</b> - the 08/21/2013 at 12:12pm

RamboFlowerChild's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

RamboFlowerChild's favorite FMLs

Today, I helped an old man who fell over. Turns out he was drunk and had pissed himself. He decided to thank me with a hug. FML

#21461220
28 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18285) - you deserved it (1428)

On 08/27/2015 at 2:46am - misc - by philip708 (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was washing my face like I normally do. My mom walked by as I was wiping my face and said "That's the washcloth I use to wipe my ass!" My dad and brothers are now only addressing me as "Assface." FML

#21460902
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19526) - you deserved it (1970)

On 08/26/2015 at 9:55am - misc - by aaaaaaaaasssssssssssssss (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my cousin's husband argued adamantly that the Earth doesn't rotate, and treated me like an idiot when I explained why he was wrong. Not even a video from space of the Earth rotating convinced him. This idiot is a teacher. FML

#21460521
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25087) - you deserved it (1506)

On 08/25/2015 at 1:33pm - misc - by Schizomaniac (man) - United States

Today, at my sister's wedding, I got my 15 month old son to 'sign' the big guest book. I gave him a pen and was hoping for a cute little squiggle or something. But no, he managed to draw something that looked uncannily like a big swastika. FML

#21459659
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12665) - you deserved it (12160)

On 08/23/2015 at 12:46pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, a customer approached me, smiling and asked what kind of cheese was in our cheddar cheese balls. Thinking he was joking, I laughed and said "swiss." He ordered, found they were indeed cheddar cheese, and reported me. FML

Today, I was forced to watch my 5 year old cousin. In an attempt to get him to sit still for a minute, I challenged him to a thumb wrestling match. It's been 2 hours and he keeps thumb wrestling me. If I stop, he cries. FML

Today, I went to the store with my 4-year-old daughter. When I went to change into tight jeans which weren't completely on, my daughter opened the curtain and yelled: "It's the mommy show!" Everyone there heard her and saw me. FML

#21454009
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22854) - you deserved it (2083)

On 08/09/2015 at 8:37pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, in the second week of August, hell has come to earth; my mom has been playing Christmas music all afternoon and is already searching online for decorations. I hope she buys a length of rope to go with them, because I've already given up on life. FML

#21453582
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22241) - you deserved it (2410)

On 08/08/2015 at 6:52pm - misc - by brbkillingmyself - United States

Today, my wife handed over most of our son's college fund, in cash, to an investment scammer going by the name "Herp A. Derpson". FML

#21453336
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27808) - you deserved it (3080)

On 08/08/2015 at 12:02am - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was singing along to my favorite song when a giant bug flew into my mouth. I was so shocked I almost swallowed it. After I was done freaking out, my sister wanted to throw the bug a big funeral for its "heroic sacrifice" in shutting me up. FML

#21450341
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23959) - you deserved it (5624)

On 08/01/2015 at 4:29am - animals - by funnnyyyyy -_- (woman) - Nepal

Today, my brother was telling me about my "sweet" and "pure" ex-girlfriend. Three stab wounds have already proven otherwise. FML

#21448265
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22985) - you deserved it (1590)

On 07/27/2015 at 9:27pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, I went to my girlfriend's job to surprise her for lunch, her manager said she hasn't worked on a Saturday in two months. FML

#21446986
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27994) - you deserved it (1735)

On 07/25/2015 at 11:51am - love - by WhoLikesPie (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was hanging out with my neighbor. He asked me if I wanted to play Twister, and I said no because I thought it would be weird. What was his response? "C'mon. You can leave if it gets sexual". FML

Today, I was on a date, and I tried breaking the ice by telling him my best joke. He laughed hysterically for a good 10 seconds, started beating the table with his fist, then suddenly went deadpan and said "No, seriously, you're a moron. Screw this date." FML

#21446581
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27056) - you deserved it (2756)

On 07/24/2015 at 2:54pm - misc - by HAIL SITHIS (woman) - United States

Today, I was telling 3 classmates on Whatsapp about my depression. One of them told me to "nut up n grow a pear." 2 hours after we mocked him for being an illiterate jackass, one of us has had our car tires knifed and another's house has been egged. I'm terrified of what will happen to me. FML

#21446551
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22053) - you deserved it (4797)

On 07/24/2015 at 1:59pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - Northern Mariana Islands



FML's blog

  • Pauline's illustrated FML
  • Come on, no need to make that face ! Yep, it's sadly the last, mournful days of Summer. People are packing up their beach balls and flip flops, putting their caravans back into storage and trying to forget…

Friday 28 August 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: