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Today, I put on some goggles on in the pool, only to go underwater and see an old man "discreetly" jerking it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27006) - you deserved it (2960)
On 03/17/2010 at 2:12am - intimacy - by today -
Today, I was driving with my mom. She had some soda with her from earlier, and even though it was probably warm, I was thirsty. I ask for a sip, she hands it to me and says sure. And I get a mouthful of ash-and-cigarette-butt-filled soda. Apparently she didn't feel the need to mention this to me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20002) - you deserved it (2169)
On 02/25/2010 at 11:28am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Nevada)
Today, I found out my cousin - who suffers from bipolar disorder - shot herself in the chest and has only a 20 percent chance of living. I told my boyfriend, while crying, and he held me for a few minutes. As soon as I got quiet, he pulled out his iPhone and started playing a shooter game. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30191) - you deserved it (2785)
On 02/17/2010 at 1:30am - love - by lynn (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, after recently having had surgery, I Iearnt that some extra tissue was needed to cover up the hole in the roof of my mouth. Where did they get this tissue? From a dead person. I now have the flesh of a dead person in my mouth, which by the way is now infected. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31577) - you deserved it (2776)
On 02/17/2010 at 12:07am - health - by Sophie - United States (Texas)
Today, in a sporting goods store, my mom walked over to the other side of the store, when a cute guy came over to talk to me. When she saw this she grabbed a bat, walked over to us and said "If you ever even look at my daughter again, I will beat you shitless." She was serious. He ran. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23464) - you deserved it (1584)
On 02/16/2010 at 9:54pm - misc - by batter--up (woman) - United States (Georgia)
Today, I found out that I was not adopted and in fact my parents are my biological parents. How did I find out? Over dinner. How long have I been believing I was adopted? 22 years. Why did I start believing I was adopted? My siblings thought it would be a funny joke. My mom played along. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35347) - you deserved it (2226)
On 02/11/2010 at 7:22am - misc - by Biological (man) - United States (California)
Today, my girlfriend of a couple of months texted me that she was very sad because her puppy had just passed away. Feeling sorry for her, I bought her another puppy of the same breed. I wrapped it in a blanket and placed it on the passenger seat and went to pick her up from school. She sat on it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23292) - you deserved it (5800)
On 02/10/2010 at 7:03pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I noticed that my neighbor's house has a clear view of my daughter's bathroom. There is a telescope in his window. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28846) - you deserved it (1842)
On 02/08/2010 at 7:28pm - misc - by disasterbutton (woman) - United States (Virginia)
Today, one of my friends pointed out I'm starting to get a mustache! - "You're finally a man!" To bad it's my 15th birthday, and I'm a girl. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22000) - you deserved it (2219)
On 02/05/2010 at 1:25am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I got sent to detention for saying, "that's what she said" after a girl in my class said, "push a little harder" while disecting a frog. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24017) - you deserved it (16480)
On 02/05/2010 at 12:01am - misc - by eemp - Sent from mobile version
Today, I woke up with my face sharpied. I live alone. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33384) - you deserved it (2612)
On 01/22/2010 at 3:51pm - misc - by Funnymann - United States
Today, I found out my little sister was a stripper. At the same time, she found out that when I said I was having a "quiet birthday with some friends," what I really meant was "hiring a stripper to jump out of a cake." FML
I agree, your life sucks (42755) - you deserved it (6374)
On 01/18/2010 at 3:26pm - misc - by Jon (man) - United States (Oregon)
Monday 20 May 2013
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