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RaesLilly

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RaesLilly

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 20 April 1995 (19 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1445
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 8 posted

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RaesLilly's page activity

Visits<b>ssgirll98</b> - the 05/28/2013 at 9:11am<b>goalie01</b> - the 05/25/2013 at 5:25am

RaesLilly's FML badges

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RaesLilly's favorite FMLs

Today, I was ringing an old man up in the local grocery store when I had realized all he was buying was 3 bottles of vodka and a box of condoms. While I was loading the bags into his cart he laid his hand on my shoulder and told me "I'd take you home with me but chances are I would be arrested". FML

#711978
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (101266) - you deserved it (5267)

On 03/30/2009 at 9:13pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Maine)

Today, I texted my boyfriend of 6 months saying that I was in the mood, and that I was in bed, and naked. He texted back saying "U got fingers, use them, im going to bed xoxo". FML

#405303
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (136809) - you deserved it (36843)

On 03/17/2009 at 1:06am - intimacy - by princess (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I opened my birthday present from my grandfather. It was a map of the USA color coded by regional percentage of available men. FML

#238786
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54220) - you deserved it (3880)

On 03/07/2009 at 11:28pm - misc - by Noname (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, during my choral concert, I was helping turn the pages for the pianist who was accompanying the singers. In the middle of the song, one of the pages slipped and fell into his crotch area. In a panic, I frantically reached to grab the music. Well, I grabbed something. It wasn't the music. FML

#213399
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36961) - you deserved it (11516)

On 03/04/2009 at 11:29pm - misc - by a person - United States (California)

Today, I was debating weed legalization in drug awareness. I was thoroughly unleashing arguments: how marijuana turns normal citizens into criminals, how the government spends billions to enforce drug laws, when I lost my train of thought. My teacher grinned saying, "My point exactly." FML

Today, I borrowed a van to move some of my furniture. I wasn't used to the brakes so when I stopped at a red light, I pretty much ended up in the cross walk. Suddenly I heard a loud thud at the side of the van. I turned to see what idiot would walk into a van. It was a blind man. FML

#174723
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13791) - you deserved it (46394)

On 03/01/2009 at 8:09pm - misc - by jazojigga (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was pissing in a urinal and I had the urge to sneeze. Unable to hold it, I sneezed and hit my head on a metal beam supporting the urinal. In complete disarray, I had to step back from the urinal while pissing and managed to spray the floor, the wall, and the person next to me. FML

#125156
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56726) - you deserved it (6780)

On 02/24/2009 at 5:57pm - misc - by iliketurtles (man) - United States (California)

Today, I saw my friend across campus, and I decided that I wanted to play a trick on her and scare her from behind. Turns out, I scared a complete stranger with really bad panic induced asthma. FML

#59474
11 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9877) - you deserved it (37672)

On 02/17/2009 at 3:25am - misc - by boo! (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I called my dad to inform him I was coming home from college for the weekend. Expecting him to be excited, he responded with "why?" This weekend was my birthday. FML

#16023
12 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36485) - you deserved it (1865)

On 02/08/2009 at 9:32pm - misc - by seb21 (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my wife left me the following voicemail: “Alex, last night was amazing. You took me to places I’ve never been to before. I can’t wait to see you tonight after work.” My name is Rob. We haven’t had sex in two years. FML

#9051
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55152) - you deserved it (8244)

On 02/05/2009 at 2:57am - intimacy - by Barrel - United States (Missouri)

Today, I found FML for the first time in class, and literally laughed out loud in the middle of the lecture in front of 200 classmates. Today's lecture? The cruelties of slavery. FML

#6752
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28691) - you deserved it (27757)

On 02/03/2009 at 5:55pm - work - by kprice6 (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I woke up and I'm still in the Marine Corps. FML

#2960
13 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15985) - you deserved it (37768)

On 01/28/2009 at 4:24am - work - by carboat - United States (California)

Today, I had a dream that I was 25, unemployed, living with my parents, and still completely in love with someone who no longer feels the same way about me. Oh wait... it wasn't a dream. FML

#1809
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21241) - you deserved it (5655)

On 01/19/2009 at 11:23pm - misc - by HeadTrauma - United States (West Virginia)

Today, I was hanging out with a couple of friends and one of them tells a funny story about how he filled a condom with syrup and put it in his friend's mouth while he was asleep. Me with my big mouth starts to say, "Condoms taste na--" and stopped myself as everyone started laughing at me. FML

#1302
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5480) - you deserved it (22206)

On 01/15/2009 at 7:39pm - misc - by jen - United States (Arkansas)

Today, the only cute girl in my office made fun of me because I'm 27 and bring fruit cups with my lunch. FML

#1197
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18922) - you deserved it (3905)

On 01/15/2009 at 6:36am - love - by liltravol23 - United States (Georgia)



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