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RaesLilly

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RaesLilly
  • Town/Country : Las Vegas, United States
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 20 April 1995 (18 years)
  • Number of visits : 910
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 8 posted

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Today, I was in a meeting at work. In the middle of our CEO's speech, I farted. Everyone heard including my boss, who looked over and said, "Do you have anything else you wanted to add?" FML

#6708463
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14424) - you deserved it (20022)

On 12/11/2009 at 1:11pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, my greatgrandpa came over for dinner. Halfway through the meal, he pooped himself. My family went through the rest of the meal acting like we hadn't noticed to avoid embarassment. As it was coming to an end, my sister came home and immediately yelled, "Ew! Did someone poop?" He cried. FML

#6676147
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39182) - you deserved it (2369)

On 12/09/2009 at 2:39am - misc - by PoorGramps - United States (Texas)

Today, I went to the grocery store to stock up on booze for the weekend. After the cashier commented on the size my purchase, I claimed to be hosting a dinner party tonight. I'm not. FML

#6608304
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6013) - you deserved it (27901)

On 12/04/2009 at 11:08pm - misc - by Wino (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I spoke with my boyfriend's crazy ex-girlfriend. Actually, she isn't all that crazy. He really did cheat on her with half a dozen other girls. The same girls he's apparently cheating on me with. How do I know for sure? Thank you crazy ex for his email passwords. FML

#6521538
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39317) - you deserved it (4354)

On 11/29/2009 at 9:06pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I had six friends round for pizza. When I went to answer the door to the delivery, my friends turned off the lights and pretended they weren't there when I shouted for help carrying all the food. Not only does the cute delivery guy think I'm greedy, but also that I have imaginary friends. FML

#6464238
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23069) - you deserved it (2857)

On 11/26/2009 at 3:30pm - misc - by has-evil-friends (woman) - United Kingdom (Nottingham)

Today, I went to see the new Twilight movie, for the second time. The first time was at the midnight premiere. I would be "okay" with it if the person who had dragged me to see it both times hadn't been my boyfriend. FML

#6461319
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26306) - you deserved it (5663)

On 11/26/2009 at 11:47am - misc - by HeSaysImNoBeard (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I found out that my dad has been having an affair. With my formerly favorite teacher. The best part? Yesterday, she announced to the class that she was pregnant. I clapped and congratulated her. FML

#6318893
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40126) - you deserved it (1813)

On 11/15/2009 at 10:28pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I went on blind date with a guy because both our moms thought we'd like eachother. Things were going really well until I got up to go to the bathroom and he says: "My mom was right, you do have perfect breedin' hips!" FML

#6255110
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33124) - you deserved it (3387)

On 11/11/2009 at 7:21am - love - by Starchyld (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was performing an experiment in science class. The prac required me to shake up a test tube filled with different materials. Taking the test tube in one hand, I shook it up and down. My teacher then stood next to me and said, "It's disturbing how good you are at that." FML

#6186656
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23007) - you deserved it (4632)

On 11/06/2009 at 8:02pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, driving home, my girlfriend and I decided we were finally going to have sex. We got in the backseat, then I opened my condom to find it was already broken. We ended up playing connect four instead. FML

#6105149
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14806) - you deserved it (3514)

On 11/01/2009 at 5:18pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because her mom said she would buy her a pug if she did. I got dumped for a dog, and an ugly one for that matter. FML

#6100945
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32014) - you deserved it (5582)

On 11/01/2009 at 12:43pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, as I was walking home, a friend passed me by on his moped, and sprayed a bunch of silly string at me. Unfortunately, he hit me in the eye, temporarily blinding me. As I stumbled around blind, I accidentally knocked a bunch of 3 year olds off their bikes, causing them to cry. FML

#5812873
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26173) - you deserved it (2532)

On 10/13/2009 at 6:09am - misc - by sillystring (man) - China (Beijing)

Today, as I was walking home, a friend passed me by on his moped, and sprayed a bunch of silly string at me. Unfortunately, he hit me in the eye, temporarily blinding me. As I stumbled around blind, I accidentally knocked a bunch of 3 year olds off their bikes, causing them to cry. FML

#5812873
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26173) - you deserved it (2532)

On 10/13/2009 at 6:09am - misc - by sillystring (man) - China (Beijing)

Today, I poured my heart out into what had to be my greatest set of lyrics for my band ever, at the same time my teacher was explaining chemical changes to the class. At the end of the lecture he picked up my paper, and set it on fire to demonstrate a chemical change. FML

#5686873
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32885) - you deserved it (29614)

On 10/06/2009 at 6:23pm - misc - by 3LLI0TT (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, when approaching a stop light on my motorcycle, I went to extend my left leg as usual to balance when stopped. Apparently my shoelace loop got wrapped around the shift lever and "tied" my shoe to the bike. It's hard to look cool when you fall over for no apparent reason at a stoplight. FML

#5682176
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30087) - you deserved it (6723)

On 10/06/2009 at 1:33pm - misc - by Crotch_Rocket_Rider (man) - United States (Illinois)



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