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Perfectionist
Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
Today, I had to finally accept that my husband is too large for me. Normally, it'd be a bragging point, except my private parts can't handle it. After several infections brought on after vaginal tearing, I'm having to choose between being in perpetual pain, or giving up my sex life. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38184) - you deserved it (2637)
On 08/18/2012 at 10:48pm - intimacy - by sal (woman) - United States (Idaho)
Today, I found myself trying to explain to my puppy why I'm still single. I think I just found out why. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13140) - you deserved it (3952)
On 08/18/2012 at 7:02pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, I found out that my six year old cousin has a raging crush on my boyfriend. She lives across the street and watches from her window for his car to appear in front of my house. She's indicated that she'll stop at nothing until he's hers. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17551) - you deserved it (1354)
On 08/18/2012 at 4:34pm - kids - by yoggabe (woman) - Mexico (Tabasco)
Today, as I was riding my bike, my foot slipped and I did a slow speed-tumble over the top, ripping my balls wide open. Number of stitches: too many to count. Size of balls: softball. Color: blue. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31144) - you deserved it (1491)
On 08/18/2012 at 1:15am - health - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I found out that my new husband is expecting two children: ours, due in January, and our 16-year-old neighbor's, due in March. FML
I agree, your life sucks (48954) - you deserved it (2183)
On 08/18/2012 at 1:09am - misc - by Just_Me_88 - United States (Oregon)
Today, the whole family came over to celebrate my 18th birthday. My grandfather bought me a giant mathematics book. Apparently, he didn't want my 16 year old sister to be "jealous", so he got her the new iPad. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24105) - you deserved it (1105)
On 08/18/2012 at 12:51am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, my family and I went to the movie theater. There weren't enough free seats near the front, so I sat a few rows back with my grandpa. He kept throwing our snacks at my parents' heads all through the movie. He claimed he'd been asleep the whole time, and I'm now grounded. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19512) - you deserved it (1621)
On 08/17/2012 at 8:39pm - misc - by wow, thanks (man) - United States (Washington)
Today, I got a phone call out of the blue from a young man, who screamed that he was going to kill me for sleeping with his fiancée. I told him I am a 49-year-old man who hasn't been laid since my wife passed away, four years ago. He stammered, shouted, "Well she was a slut too" and hung up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25288) - you deserved it (927)
On 08/17/2012 at 8:20pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States
Today, I bought the only cat on Earth that doesn't like chasing after a laser dot. Goodbye, hours of sick, sick entertainment. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8843) - you deserved it (14882)
On 08/17/2012 at 7:33pm - animals - by lonelygirl (woman) - United States (Utah)
Today, while on vacation with my family, my mother told me to put my phone in her purse, so it wouldn't get stolen. Someone stole her purse. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15527) - you deserved it (1156)
On 08/17/2012 at 12:45pm - money - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)
Today, I was talking to my husband about how I wanted our marriage to improve and not just be sex all the time. In the middle of my sentence, he asked for a blow job. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20970) - you deserved it (653)
On 08/17/2012 at 9:31am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (South Carolina)
Today, my dog was run over. The man who ran over my dog was taking his own dog to the emergency vet. As the man awkwardly tried to apologise to me, he said, "Think of the irony". FML
I agree, your life sucks (17685) - you deserved it (1007)
On 08/17/2012 at 7:26am - animals - by byegeorge (woman) - United Kingdom (Hounslow)
Today, my house got broken into. They just made a mess. I saw a note on the kitchen table that read "There's nothing good here. You have shitty stuff." FML
I agree, your life sucks (18009) - you deserved it (1781)
On 08/17/2012 at 3:45am - misc - by Sarah - Canada (Alberta)
Today, my boyfriend was coming home after a month of being away. When I heard him knock on the door, I rushed to open it and jumped into his arms for a hug. It wasn't him; it was the mailman. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15189) - you deserved it (4766)
On 08/17/2012 at 12:08am - love - by SquishFish - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, while I was taking my driver's test, my instructor received a text message. He promptly had a panic attack and screamed for me to pull over. It turned out his wife wanted a divorce. The last 15 minutes of my test consisted of him sobbing to himself as I drove back to the DMV. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20470) - you deserved it (1120)
On 08/16/2012 at 6:36pm - misc - by Samantha (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Monday 20 May 2013
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