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Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
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You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
Racky's favorite FMLs
by chickenmcnuggetgirl / 03/18/2013 at 2:10pm / Ireland (Meath) / Intimacy
Today, I told my girlfriend I've been a vegetarian for 6 years. Hearing this, my mom said, "No, you're not. I fry your mushrooms and onions in bacon grease." With this new information, I've been a vegetarian for about 76 hours. FML
by Anonymous / 03/15/2013 at 12:01am / United States (Wisconsin) / Miscellaneous
Today, I held hands with the boy I like. Without thinking, I commented that his right hand is softer, as if he only used lotion on that one hand. And then we stood there in terribly awkward silence. FML
by Anonymous / 03/13/2013 at 12:57am / United States (Missouri) / Love
by lolk / 03/10/2013 at 3:41am / United States (Arkansas) / Intimacy
Today, a technician from my ISP came to my house to replace my router. He asked for a glass of water, one thing led to another, and for some reason I'll never fully understand, we ended up having sex. Looks like porn logic is not so far off the mark after all. FML
by je_regrette_tout / 03/09/2013 at 1:50pm / Intimacy
Today, my psychopathic ex-girlfriend spray-painted "Free Candy" on the side of my van, knowing damn well I have to park it in front of an elementary school on a daily basis to pick up my daughter. FML
by cjw / 03/05/2013 at 7:07pm / United States / Kids
by DEATHBYEX1LE / 03/04/2013 at 12:01am / Australia / Love
by Anonymous / 03/01/2013 at 2:18am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by Ugh / 02/27/2013 at 4:42pm / United Kingdom / Kids
Today, I gave birth to my daughter in a hospital corridor. The nurse who took me to my room afterward tried to comfort me by saying there've been worse incidents; she said that two years ago, a lady gave birth in the parking lot. That was me too. FML
by laprochainefoisjerestealamaison / 02/25/2013 at 2:47pm / France (Languedoc-Roussillon) / Health
Today, I was holding the door open for a friend. She told me to wait a second because she had to finish a text. Nearly a minute passed before I asked why she wouldn't come inside to finish typing. We were at a Chinese restaurant. She thought the "No MSG" sign meant you couldn't text inside. FML
by cls_x / 02/24/2013 at 2:53am / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 02/21/2013 at 8:43am / United States (Idaho) / Miscellaneous
Today, my son asked me if the short films I write are for little kids or for adults. Since I write horror-filled films, I said it was for adults. He went and told his teacher that I made "adult films". FML
by Laila / 02/20/2013 at 7:01am / United States / Kids
Today, I walked in on my boyfriend taking pictures of his penis in a condom. When I asked him what the hell he was doing he told me that he was making a stop-motion film called "All Dressed Up with Nowhere to go." FML
by Notaplacetogo / 02/17/2013 at 1:45am / United States (California) / Intimacy
Today, I took an afternoon nap, and when I woke up, it was pitch black outside. Still groggy, I went downstairs, only to see my dad sporting a shocked expression and a suspiciously powder-white beard. He actually almost convinced me that I'd just woken up from a five year coma. FML
by Anonymous / 02/17/2013 at 12:56am / United States / Miscellaneous