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RabidLimaBeans

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RabidLimaBeans

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
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  • Number of visits : 1180
  • Number of comments : 13
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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RabidLimaBeans's page activity

Visits<b>SteakfryOne</b> - the 06/07/2014 at 11:39pm<b>windell</b> - the 03/18/2014 at 11:48pm<b>seth7_</b> - the 02/13/2014 at 11:00pm<b>martin8337</b> - the 12/20/2013 at 10:37pm<b>rpsrascal</b> - the 12/09/2013 at 8:50pm<b>P_B683</b> - the 12/08/2013 at 3:29pm<b>tlw123</b> - the 08/30/2012 at 6:31pm

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RabidLimaBeans's favorite FMLs

Today, in the middle of the night, I got up to go get some water. When I came back, I was going to flop onto my bed, but I faceplanted into my floor. I'd forgotten that I'd rearranged my room and moved my bed. FML

#20406748
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33391) - you deserved it (19146)

On 12/19/2012 at 12:07am - misc - by ayye_its_nikki - United States (Texas)

Today, I was visiting my daughter, whose husband was still asleep at noon. I made a point of stomping around on the hardwood floor and speaking loudly to wake his lazy ass up. Turns out he's now working a 14-hour graveyard shift, and it has no negative effect on his shoe-throwing skills. FML

#20193830
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5521) - you deserved it (76397)

On 12/06/2012 at 2:23pm - misc - by mom (woman) - Netherlands (Utrecht)

Today, I told my girlfriend that I'm breaking up with her because she's very abusive. After a couple of seconds of awkward silence, she kicked me in the nuts and ran away. FML

#20189170
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28741) - you deserved it (3808)

On 12/03/2012 at 6:53am - love - by Anonymous (man) - Canada

Today, a cute girl sitting next to me asked if she could use my phone. As I handed it to her, I attempted to use the expression "knock yourself out," but for a reason I can still not fathom, it came out as "kill yourself." FML

#20120541
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27460) - you deserved it (6991)

On 10/17/2012 at 12:45am - misc - by Holy Testacles (man) - United States

Today, I caught my brother whacking off with my expensive bottle of lotion. This might not have been quite so disturbing had he not been caught with his entire penis in the bottle. FML

#20117813
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34920) - you deserved it (2685)

On 10/15/2012 at 8:10am - intimacy - by scarred_sibling - United States

Today, the office I work at put up a "No Masturbating at Desks" sign. I'm disappointed by this, not because I usually whack off at my desk, but because enough people do that there needs to be a sign against it. FML

#20043181
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28247) - you deserved it (3767)

On 08/26/2012 at 7:39pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I had to scream for my dad to come help me, after I got my hair caught in a fan while trying to make the Darth Vader voice. FML

#20006198
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8099) - you deserved it (30151)

On 08/06/2012 at 6:08pm - misc - by :$ - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I went to a corner store to re-stock my chocolate stash. A guy from work walked in to see me and the cashier arguing about the amount of candy I was trying to buy with a jar of pennies. He took one look at me and said, "That time of the month, eh?" FML

#19992100
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9406) - you deserved it (23190)

On 07/30/2012 at 2:59am - misc - by fmlgrl (woman) - United States (California)

Today, while waiting for a bus, someone started smoking at the bus shelter, which is illegal in my city. I politely asked him to stop smoking, citing the city ordinance. He just cackled and said that if I'm so concerned about the state of my health, I should start by losing 90 pounds. FML

#19749863
263 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17963) - you deserved it (34470)

On 06/07/2012 at 1:42pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I drunkenly staggered home and crashed on the couch. When I woke up I realized it wasn't my house. FML

#19710160
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10237) - you deserved it (29821)

On 05/31/2012 at 3:03pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada

Today, my boyfriend called me, panicking. Apparently he had a headache, but wasn't concentrating on what tablets he grabbed, and accidentally took tablets for "relief of period pain". He was convinced he was going to grow ovaries overnight. FML

#19697677
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25277) - you deserved it (2638)

On 05/29/2012 at 3:54am - health - by sopheeah - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my wife allowed my mother-in-law to move in with us. She believes the government spies on her in the shower, and that the Prime Minister is a shape-shifting lizard who wants to microchip us all. I have to live with this psychotic wench until someone is desperate enough to employ her. FML

#19662623
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22805) - you deserved it (2436)

On 05/22/2012 at 2:42pm - misc - by fuq (man) - United Kingdom (Cardiff)

Today, I had to collect my daughter from the hospital. Her boyfriend was even more upset than she was, because his iPhone's screen was damaged beyond repair when the doctor pulled it out of my daughter's vagina. FML

#19631928
480 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50533) - you deserved it (4714)

On 05/16/2012 at 12:10pm - intimacy - by smart move there (woman) - Ireland (Kildare)

Today, a repairman came to fix my couch, which is under warranty because the frame had broken in multiple places. To ensure I got a new couch out of the deal, I stabbed multiple holes into the cushion. The guy fixed the frame, but said there was nothing he could do about lacerations on the sofa. FML

#19565371
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4697) - you deserved it (72422)

On 05/02/2012 at 8:43pm - misc - by grovage - United States

Today, I woke up to a really cold feeling down below. I opened my eyes and saw my girlfriend grinning like a maniac and holding my crotch-sausage between two scissor blades. I screamed in terror like a little bitch, and she says I'm never gonna live this down. FML

#19506149
430 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45011) - you deserved it (4123)

On 04/21/2012 at 1:38pm - intimacy - by Hakimstah (man) - Lebanon



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