RLJJ

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RLJJ

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 19360
  • Number of comments : 64
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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RLJJ's page activity

Visits<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:33pm<b></b> - the 01/11/2011 at 7:11am<b>ch2358</b> - the 10/28/2009 at 9:44am<b>prplr</b> - the 08/31/2009 at 7:11pm<b>kayla_f_babyyy</b> - the 08/31/2009 at 6:28am<b>Htownmichigan</b> - the 08/27/2009 at 12:22am<b>Not_Ever_Telling</b> - the 08/01/2009 at 6:03pm<b>elliebutton</b> - the 07/05/2009 at 5:06am<b>wienerwagon</b> - the 07/03/2009 at 1:47pm<b>redbluegreen</b> - the 06/27/2009 at 6:12am<b>pyromaniac239</b> - the 06/02/2009 at 12:24pm<b>purelife</b> - the 06/02/2009 at 1:14am<b>5PoPpIn6DrOpPiN</b> - the 05/21/2009 at 5:56am<b>username666</b> - the 05/14/2009 at 5:02pm<b>td32</b> - the 05/12/2009 at 1:06pm<b>tiger01</b> - the 05/10/2009 at 11:15am<b>ness6</b> - the 05/06/2009 at 11:01pm<b>ipwns</b> - the 05/06/2009 at 5:01pm

RLJJ's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

RLJJ's favorite FMLs

Today, my brother came out to our family as being gay. My mother starting crying because "She wanted grandchildren." I told her that I was planning on having children. She started crying harder. FML

by bopbop / 05/19/2009 at 9:21pm / United States (Georgia) / Kids

Today, my 6 year old daughter saw a man in a wheelchair who's leg had been amputated. She walks up to him and says, "What happened?". He answers kindly that he's a war veteran. She then responds, "Well then you deserve to get your leg blown off. You shouldn't be killing people." FML

by embarrassedmom / 05/17/2009 at 9:19pm / United States (Arizona) / Kids

Today, my dog started to hump my leg. He always does this and I heard that humping the dog back asserted dominance. Well, I decided to, and I dry humped him back. As I was doing this I said "How do you like that!" And then my mom walked in. FML

by sucks / 05/17/2009 at 7:40pm / United States (Georgia) / Animals

Today, when done feeding my newborn, I stated to my husband that I'm a cow. He said, in a sincere tone, "Oh, baby, you'll lose the weight soon." I meant cow because I'm producing so much milk. FML

by Heifer / 05/16/2009 at 5:41pm / United States (Washington) / Love

Today, I was selected to give my speech to the entire school. I was later told it had to be censored because it was inappropriate, even though I was just trying to make a point. My speech was on political correctness. My speech on political correctness was censored for political reasons. FML

by Anonymous / 05/16/2009 at 9:06am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, we were running late for school so my mum shouted at me to hurry up and get in the car. I put my school bags in the boot of the car and my mum drove off. It wasn't until she got to my school and told me to get out that she realised I wasn't there. FML

by albert / 05/13/2009 at 8:36am / United Kingdom (Hertford) / Miscellaneous

Today, I told my parents that I was going out with my boyfriend and they agreed to let me go as long as I was home by midnight. Did I come home on time? Yes. Was my shirt right side out? No. FML

by insideout / 05/10/2009 at 4:25pm / United States (Connecticut) / Intimacy

Today, my friend had to take my cat who has a tumor to be put down when I wasn't home since I couldn't bear to take him myself. I have two cats. He took the wrong one. FML

by catlady1989 / 05/10/2009 at 3:01pm / United States (Washington) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I thought it would be funny if I put a 'Free if Hot-Wired' sign on my friend's car. I guess it worked. FML

by t-dawg / 05/09/2009 at 12:18am / United States (Minnesota) / Transportation

Today, my family was preparing a turkey for my grandma's birthday dinner when my aunt noticed a utensil on the counter and asked what it was for. My mom said it was used to keep the turkey's legs together. My aunt responded to her by saying, "Maybe you should get one for your daughter." FML

by Familyskank / 05/06/2009 at 12:57pm / United States (Minnesota) / Intimacy

Today, my girlfriend's mother called her in the bedroom for a serious talk. I overheard them arguing and yelling at each other. It turns out her mother found a condom next to her garbage. We got caught because her cat swallowed the condom and threw it up. FML

by badluckdrew / 05/01/2009 at 10:28am / United States (Wisconsin) / Intimacy

Today, a telemarketer called for my dad. Jokingly, I said, "I haven't seen him for like five days...I'm starting to get worried," in my best child-like voice. Apparently the telemarketer called Child Protective Services. I'm 20. FML

by Telemistake / 04/30/2009 at 2:03pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, my kids told me that for the FIRST time, my cooking was delicious. I made Kraft dinner that night. FML

by Anonymous / 04/28/2009 at 4:47pm / Canada (Ontario) / Kids

Today, I realized the senior thesis I turned in last week uses the word "asses" instead of "assess" 17 times. FML

by fuckspellcheck / 04/28/2009 at 2:47pm / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I turned 18. My parents gave me a card that read "now that you're 18, it's time for some boozy fun... you can do all the things you did before but legally!" Taped to the inside was my fake id that I "lost" three months ago. FML

by owned / 04/28/2009 at 10:12am / Singapore / Miscellaneous